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Welcome to the new and improved TLW!

 

Some of you may experience issues logging in and will get an 'incorrect password' error. Don't worry, you haven't typed it in wrong and your password hasn't been changed. You will need to reset it though in order to log in. Click the reset password link and you will receive an email with your new temporary password. Once logged in, you need to choose a new password (or restore to your old one) otherwise you will be locked out again.

 

If you have an out of date email address linked to your account, then you won't receive the new password. If that's the case then you'll need to email me (dave @liverpoolway.co.uk) or send me a tweet @theliverpoolway and I'll update your password manually. 

 

Any other problems or questions just let me know.

 

Thanks

Dave

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I swallowed a load of scrabble pieces earlier, my next trip to the toilet could spell disaster

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A young daughter is at home when her father calls. The daughter picks up.

"Hello?"

"Hi honey. This is Daddy. Is Mommy near the phone?"

"No Daddy. She's upstairs in the bedroom with Uncle Paul."

A brief pause. "But honey, you haven't got an Uncle Paul."

"Mommy says I do! He's with Mommy in the room, right now."

Another brief pause. "Uh, alright, here's what Daddy wants you to do. Put the phone down on the table, run upstairs and knock on the bedroom door, and shout to Mommy that Daddy's car just pulled into the driveway."

"Okay Daddy, just a minute."

A few minutes later, the little girl comes back to the phone. "Okay, I've done it, Daddy."

"And what happened, honey?"

"Mommy got all scared and jumped out of bed with no clothes on and ran around screaming. Then she tripped over the rug, hit her head on the dresser and now she's not moving at all."

"Oh my god!!! What about the Uncle Paul?!"

"Uncle Paul jumped out of bed with no clothes on too! He got all scared and jumped out the window into the swimming pool. But I think he doesn't know you took out the water last week to clean it. He hit the bottom of the pool and now he isn't moving too."

A long pause this time. "Swimming pool...? Is this 555-5731?"

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2 minutes ago, AngryofTuebrook said:

I was going to post a joke about time travel, but you lot didn't like it. 

hahahahaha 

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10 hours ago, AngryofTuebrook said:

I was going to post a joke about time travel, but you lot didn't like it. 

And orders a pint. 

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I received an accidental text today: 'I'l be home soon, love ya, Dave xxx'

 

Being Valentines weekend I thought I'd text the bloke back: 'Don't bother, I don't love you, you're a twat & I've been shagging your brother!'

 

I couldn't wait for the reply, but then it came.....

 

'WTF mum???'

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On 10/31/2010 at 11:24 AM, halewood pete said:

Take That have announced they are playing at Anfield next year on their tour.

I have got a tenner on them to win

Prescient!

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On 2/14/2019 at 1:52 PM, Hank Moody said:

How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

 

To get to the other side.

 

 

I find that very offensive. 

 

In fact, Hank, did you feed the dog and get the coal in?  Mary’s coming over for dinner and I’ve got to do the shopping before Woolworths closes. 

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Article in the Grauniad today about male decor by a guy called Kevin McKenna and I thought this bit was worth posting on here.

 

 Tam is a veteran of the building trade and on being asked in a wine bar by a lady he was squiring to order her a margarita he told her that they could have a pizza later.

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