The "things that make you realise you're getting older" thread

[luna985]

I was at a gig recently, Blur Song2 came on the PA before the main band came on and this one kid says to his mate - "This is Blur, they are really retro".

 

Made me feel like a right old bastard

[Stouffer]

Getting out of bed and stretching you legs sounds like someone playing the maraccas.

 

I love doing that when I get into bed, cold beds are best.

[hamstrung]

When there are people competing in sports events that are younger than you.

 

Every day must be a struggle for you Robbie.

[robslappa]

When the barber spends more time on your nose and ears than he does on your head.

[hamstrung]

I was having sex prior to some people on here having been born.

 

Therefore, it is reasonable to conclude that I might be Robbie's or Kopitelewis's dad. At a push, Woo, ODris, Carradonna et al may also have come from my loins. Might need to do the maths on that.

 

If any of them are devastatingly handsome and witty, they probably came from my balls.

[RoboRiise]

Went to the doctors before and I'm pretty certain he's younger than me, a disturbing turn of events to be sure, doesn't it take about 50 years to become a GP?

 

 

I had to see a consultant about an ankle injury about two months ago and he was seven years younger than me. It really hit me, I was thinking "fucking hell Dougie Howser, run along and fetch the grown-up doctor" but he's probably been working at that level for a couple of years now.

 

 

Recently I've noticed myself checking out birds from the call centre at work and then realising I'm actually old enough to be their dad.

 

I'm a disgrace really, I'm going to be such a grumpy, patronising, lecherous old man if I'm around that long. Still, why change the habits of a lifetime?

[Remmie]

Some girls that I'm sure we're 'of age' on the train today actually said the following: 'That Zac Efron is good looking for an older bloke'. Older? As in 14? Jesus H Christ.

 

To be fair they were massive dribble chins.

[RobbieOR]

I was having sex prior to some people on here having been born.

 

Therefore, it is reasonable to conclude that I might be Robbie's or Kopitelewis's dad. At a push, Woo, ODris, Carradonna et al may also have come from my loins. Might need to do the maths on that.

 

If any of them are devastatingly handsome and witty, they probably came from my balls.

 

Dad, Is that you?

[kop]

Loads of good ones in here, not many I can add.

 

There's one though; caring less and less about my age reminds me of getting older... "the alternative is worse" is a line I use pretty much every time the topic arises. Don't know yet if it's self-protective or if I really mean it, but I think it's the latter (having mates died of chancer makes it a valid comment).

 

Thought of another aswell... engaging in discussions like this is a reminder.

[kop]

I was having sex prior to some people on here having been born.

 

Therefore, it is reasonable to conclude that I might be Robbie's or Kopitelewis's dad. At a push, Woo, ODris, Carradonna et al may also have come from my loins. Might need to do the maths on that.

 

If any of them are devastatingly handsome and witty, they probably came from my balls.

 

You're Phil Spector, where do I claim my prize?

 

[RobbieOR]

Another one: When you start to take an intrest in politics.

[DJLJ]

This made me feel old.

 

BBC NEWS | UK | Magazine | Giving up my iPod for a Walkman

 

Giving up my iPod for a Walkman

Scott Campbell with Walkman

 

When the Sony Walkman was launched, 30 years ago this week, it started a revolution in portable music. But how does it compare with its digital successors? The Magazine invited 13-year-old Scott Campbell to swap his iPod for a Walkman for a week.

 

My dad had told me it was the iPod of its day.

 

He had told me it was big, but I hadn't realised he meant THAT big. It was the size of a small book.

 

When I saw it for the first time, its colour also struck me. Nowadays gadgets come in a rainbow of colours but this was only one shade - a bland grey.

 

LISTEN UP TEENAGERS... THE CLASSIC WALKMAN EXPLAINED

Sony Walkman

1: Clunky buttons

2: Switch to metal (that's a type of cassette, not heavy rock music)

3: Battery light - usually found flickering in its death throes

4: Double headphone jack (not to be found on an iPod)

5: Door ejects - watch out for flying tapes and eye injuries

 

Walkman v iPod: Scott's verdict

 

So it's not exactly the most aesthetically pleasing choice of music player. If I was browsing in a shop maybe I would have chosen something else.

 

From a practical point of view, the Walkman is rather cumbersome, and it is certainly not pocket-sized, unless you have large pockets. It comes with a handy belt clip screwed on to the back, yet the weight of the unit is enough to haul down a low-slung pair of combats.

 

When I wore it walking down the street or going into shops, I got strange looks, a mixture of surprise and curiosity, that made me a little embarrassed.

 

As I boarded the school bus, where I live in Aberdeenshire, I was greeted with laughter. One boy said: "No-one uses them any more." Another said: "Groovy." Yet another one quipped: "That would be hard to lose."

 

My friends couldn't imagine their parents using this monstrous box, but there was interest in what the thing was and how it worked.

 

In some classes in school they let me listen to music and one teacher recognised it and got nostalgic.

 

It took me three days to figure out that there was another side to the tape. That was not the only naive mistake that I made; I mistook the metal/normal switch on the Walkman for a genre-specific equaliser, but later I discovered that it was in fact used to switch between two different types of cassette.

 

I managed to create an impromptu shuffle feature simply by holding down 'rewind' and releasing it randomly

 

Another notable feature that the iPod has and the Walkman doesn't is "shuffle", where the player selects random tracks to play. Its a function that, on the face of it, the Walkman lacks. But I managed to create an impromptu shuffle feature simply by holding down "rewind" and releasing it randomly - effective, if a little laboured.

 

I told my dad about my clever idea. His words of warning brought home the difference between the portable music players of today, which don't have moving parts, and the mechanical playback of old. In his words, "Walkmans eat tapes". So my clumsy clicking could have ended up ruining my favourite tape, leaving me music-less for the rest of the day.

 

Digital relief

 

Throughout my week using the Walkman, I came to realise that I have very little knowledge of technology from the past. I made a number of naive mistakes, but I also learned a lot about the grandfather of the MP3 Player.

 

You can almost imagine the excitement about the Walkman coming out 30 years ago, as it was the newest piece of technology at the time.

Scott Campbell and mum Susan

The Walkman was a nostalgic sight for Scott's parents

 

Perhaps that kind of anticipation and excitement has been somewhat lost in the flood of new products which now hit our shelves on a regular basis.

 

Personally, I'm relieved I live in the digital age, with bigger choice, more functions and smaller devices. I'm relieved that the majority of technological advancement happened before I was born, as I can't imagine having to use such basic equipment every day.

 

Having said all that, portable music is better than no music.

 

Now, for technically curious readers, I've directly compared the portable cassette player with its latter-day successor. Here are the main cons, and even a pro, I found with this piece of antique technology.

 

SOUND

 

This is the function that matters most. To make the music play, you push the large play button. It engages with a satisfying clunk, unlike the finger tip tap for the iPod.

 

When playing, it is clearly evident that the music sounds significantly different than when played on an MP3 player, mainly because of the hissy backtrack and odd warbly noises on the Walkman.

 

The warbling is probably because of the horrifically short battery life; it is nearly completely dead within three hours of firing it up. Not long after the music warbled into life, it abruptly ended.

 

CONVENIENCE

 

With the plethora of MP3 players available on the market nowadays, each boasting bigger and better features than its predecessor, it is hard to imagine the prospect of purchasing and using a bulky cassette player instead of a digital device.

Sony Walkman

Music on the move

 

Furthermore, there were a number of buttons protruding from the top and sides of this device to provide functions such as "rewinding" and "fast-forwarding" (remember those?), which added even more bulk.

 

As well as this, the need for changing tapes is bothersome in itself. The tapes which I had could only hold around 12 tracks each, a fraction of the capacity of the smallest iPod.

 

Did my dad, Alan, really ever think this was a credible piece of technology?

 

"I remembered it fondly as a way to enjoy what music I liked, where I liked," he said. "But when I see it now, I wonder how I carried it!"

 

WALKMAN 1, MP3 PLAYER 0

 

But it's not all a one-way street when you line up a Walkman against an iPod. The Walkman actually has two headphone sockets, labelled A and B, meaning the little music that I have, I can share with friends. To plug two pairs of headphones in to an iPod, you have to buy a special adapter.

 

Another useful feature is the power socket on the side, so that you can plug the Walkman into the wall when you're not on the move. But given the dreadful battery life, I guess this was an outright necessity rather than an extra function.

 

Scott Campbell co-edits his own news website, Net News Daily.

[hamstrung]

My 34th birthday...

[RobbieOR]

Happy Birthday Hammy.

[Thants]

When you think of something to post in this thread, but wondered if you'd maybe already posted it. Then when you actually come to post it anyway, you've completely forgotten what the fuck it was.

 

Love that.

 

Happy birthday Ham. Enjoy a birthday bluetit.

[odris]

My 34th birthday...

 

You would have to have been around 14/15 to be my dad.

[RJ Fan club]

I did an exam last week. Fuck me, that made me feel old, not so much the sore hand from two hours writing, or from the young ladies around me sitting an exam at masters level despite being born in the same year as the Seoul olympics or even one of the lecturers being younger than me.

 

No I felt old as I realise I don't have the bladder of a 20 year old anymore. A two hour exam was conducted like a military operation. I had to go nil by mouth for three hours before the exam and decided not to drink anything till an hour in. Result: had to legit at the end to prevent said young birds from seeing me about to piss myself.

[bri]

calling young uns in the st bloody idiots, look at the state of him.

 

The idea of wearing tight jeans is just to ridiculous,

 

young fanny in work being to young.

 

going grey

 

were all bloody doomed

[hamstrung]

You would have to have been around 14/15 to be my dad.

 

I threw it around a bit at 15.

 

As much as any clumsy, inept 15 year old can, obviously.

[Section_31]

I did an exam last week. Fuck me, that made me feel old, not so much the sore hand from two hours writing, or from the young ladies around me sitting an exam at masters level despite being born in the same year as the Seoul olympics or even one of the lecturers being younger than me.

 

No I felt old as I realise I don't have the bladder of a 20 year old anymore. A two hour exam was conducted like a military operation. I had to go nil by mouth for three hours before the exam and decided not to drink anything till an hour in. Result: had to legit at the end to prevent said young birds from seeing me about to piss myself.

 

Hooooo! and he's back!

[ToxtethTerror]

When a new trainee joins your company and their year of birth is 1993!

[Unrighteous]

I have avoided this thread, but I think it's time to chime in.

 

Alright, I have been, over the last two years, been shaking my head and saying things like "fucking kids" and etc.

 

I'm shocked to see that my classmates in university seem so fucking young... and, quite frankly, stupid. I sit there and think to myself, "Did I use to be like that? Fuck sakes... I hope not."

 

I've also noticed things that I grew up with and hearing that someone doesn't know what they are and stuff... and it's crazy.

[RoboRiise]

This made me feel old.

 

BBC NEWS | UK | Magazine | Giving up my iPod for a Walkman

 

 

I still own this bad boy (picture isn't mine)

 

 

and also a later one - the model number escapes me, I'm getting old now you see. That kid knows fuck all - show me an MP3 player that's as loud as an FX20 and I'll eat my own turds. Typical of today's youth, they're even too stupid to deafen themselves properly.

 

These days, no-one in their right mind would trust a teenager with the delicate task of dismantling a Walkman using only a butter knife, in order to extract a TDK C90 that has become trapped around the drive heads. As for splicing a favourite, snapped tape using sellotape before winding it back onto the spools using a Bic biro (with another one to keep the tension on the other spool) because a tape with five second's silence as the sellotape passes over the playback heads is better than no tape at all, they wouldn't have a clue where to start.

 

This is why when the balloon finally goes up, you'll find my generation in the woods hunting animals and living in relative comfort whilst today's sallow youth die slowly from dehydration in the ruins of a burned out Starbucks.

Edited June 30, 2009 by RoboRiise

[RJ Fan club]

I still own this bad boy (picture isn't mine)

 

 

and also a later one - the model number escapes me, I'm getting old now you see. That kid knows fuck all - show me an MP3 player that's as loud as an FX20 and I'll eat my own turds. Typical of today's youth, they're even too stupid to deafen themselves properly.

 

These days, no-one in their right mind would trust a teenager with the delicate task of dismantling a Walkman using only a butter knife, in order to extract a TDK C90 that has become trapped around the drive heads. As for splicing a favourite, snapped tape using sellotape before winding it back onto the spools using a Bic biro (with another one to keep the tension on the other spool) because a tape with five second's silence as the sellotape passes over the playback heads is better than no tape at all, they wouldn't have a clue where to start.

 

 

This is why when the balloon finally goes up, you'll find my generation in the woods hunting animals and living in relative comfort whilst today's sallow youth die slowly from dehydration in the ruins of a burned out Starbucks.

 

Balloon?, while we're cutting a tennis ball in half in readyness to hot wire a mk2 Cortina and heading for the Peak District; they'll be tweeting about the latest half witted fat titted celeb non entity and wondering whose 'inventive' new tune this whirring sound is.

[Ted]

Feeling I hit my peak when I was eighteen.

 

Fuck.