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The "things that make you realise you're getting older" thread


Section_31
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1 hour ago, Mudface said:

https://metro.co.uk/2022/01/04/90-day-fiance-star-selling-farts-in-a-jar-for-38k-a-week-hospitalised-15863914/

 

Damn, I had my retirement all planned out too. Anyone know someone who'll take several thousand one hundred mil jars off my hands?

All you'd need do was go down a shit farm with about 50 jam jars, wave them through the air then screw the lids on and sell 'em on fleabay at 50 quid a time.

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10 minutes ago, dockers_strike said:

All you'd need do was go down a shit farm with about 50 jam jars, wave them through the air then screw the lids on and sell 'em on fleabay at 50 quid a time.

I've got integrity, man. My Instagram fan (hi Brian!) deserves the true Mudface smell.

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For Christmas Mrs. Stouffer got me some new slippers but they only arrived yesterday. 

 

Grey moccasin with a furry lining, memory foam and a quality "going to the bins" sole.

 

Genuinely the best slippers I've ever owned.

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4 hours ago, Stouffer said:

For Christmas Mrs. Stouffer got me some new slippers but they only arrived yesterday. 

 

Grey moccasin with a furry lining, memory foam and a quality "going to the bins" sole.

 

Genuinely the best slippers I've ever owned.

How the other half live.

 

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My lad was looking at a pair of sandals like Paul McCartney had on, and then took off, for the photo on the Abbey Road album. When he showed me the sandals in question (see below) I remarked that they were known as desert wellies. My wife, daughter and son all looked at me like I had 2 frigging heads and told me they'd never heard of them.

 

I ended up googling the phrase and came up with one mention of it in the 'scouse bible'. My wife's a few years younger than me but fuck's sake, I feel ancient now. 

 

desert wellies.jpg

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15 minutes ago, Jimmy Hills Chin said:

My lad was looking at a pair of sandals like Paul McCartney had on, and then took off, for the photo on the Abbey Road album. When he showed me the sandals in question (see below) I remarked that they were known as desert wellies. My wife, daughter and son all looked at me like I had 2 frigging heads and told me they'd never heard of them.

 

I ended up googling the phrase and came up with one mention of it in the 'scouse bible'. My wife's a few years younger than me but fuck's sake, I feel ancient now. 

 

desert wellies.jpg

Tony M will love them

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19 minutes ago, Jimmy Hills Chin said:

My lad was looking at a pair of sandals like Paul McCartney had on, and then took off, for the photo on the Abbey Road album. When he showed me the sandals in question (see below) I remarked that they were known as desert wellies. My wife, daughter and son all looked at me like I had 2 frigging heads and told me they'd never heard of them.

 

I ended up googling the phrase and came up with one mention of it in the 'scouse bible'. My wife's a few years younger than me but fuck's sake, I feel ancient now. 

 

desert wellies.jpg

Desert wellies or Jesus boots!

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I took the 11 year old to the barbers. He wanted to go to the barbers his dad usually takes him to instead of mine which was no bother. 
 

However, as we sit down I notice a sign in the corner saying they don’t take card payment. 
 

I check with Owen if he’s ok to wait on his own and tell one of the barbers I’m just going to pop up the road to go the the cash point. 
 

He tells me that’s absolutely fine, then as I’m walking out the door I hear him say to Owen “doesn’t Grandad carry cash”? 

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7 minutes ago, lifetime fan said:

I took the 11 year old to the barbers. He wanted to go to the barbers his dad usually takes him to instead of mine which was no bother. 
 

However, as we sit down I notice a sign in the corner saying they don’t take card payment. 
 

I check with Owen if he’s ok to wait on his own and tell one of the barbers I’m just going to pop up the road to go the the cash point. 
 

He tells me that’s absolutely fine, then as I’m walking out the door I hear him say to Owen “doesn’t Grandad carry cash”? 

 

 

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13 minutes ago, lifetime fan said:

I took the 11 year old to the barbers. He wanted to go to the barbers his dad usually takes him to instead of mine which was no bother. 
 

However, as we sit down I notice a sign in the corner saying they don’t take card payment. 
 

I check with Owen if he’s ok to wait on his own and tell one of the barbers I’m just going to pop up the road to go the the cash point. 
 

He tells me that’s absolutely fine, then as I’m walking out the door I hear him say to Owen “doesn’t Grandad carry cash”? 

 

The fuck, does he think you were a drummer boy when you started sowing oats? 

 

Was chatting to a salesman the other day who was born after 9/11.

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4 minutes ago, Section_31 said:

 

The fuck, does he think you were a drummer boy when you started sowing oats? 

 

Was chatting to a salesman the other day who was born after 9/11.


Think I posted in the faceaids thread, a girl in my year at school has been a Nan for a couple of years now. 

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Having a neice who's 43 your mum and dad getting old and losing it, sometimes wishing i can go back to when you had your mum and dad, uncles aunties nan and grandad, everything was ok, not that it bothered you at the time, birds and all that, i shan't be looking in the mirror tonight. 

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16 minutes ago, lifetime fan said:


Think I posted in the faceaids thread, a girl in my year at school has been a Nan for a couple of years now. 

Me Mrs had two lads in her class who were both 10 and one was the other's uncle, I've never been able to work that one out.

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Started a new temporary job. Anyway 5 of us have been temporarily promoted. They set up a teams group for us. One bird who was born in 1995 says " I'm that old I remember buying cds with my pocket money"

I piped up that I'd bought tapes. Next response was " are you from the 1800s?"

The bird born in 1995 is the second oldest after me. To me 1995 is quite recent.

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1 minute ago, littletedwest said:

Started a new temporary job. Anyway 5 of us have been temporarily promoted. They set up a teams group for us. One bird who was born in 1995 says " I'm that old I remember buying cds with my pocket money"

I piped up that I'd bought tapes. Next response was " are you from the 1800s?"

The bird born in 1995 is the second oldest after me. To me 1995 is quite recent.


Fucks sake. 
 

My first Saturday job was on the record counter in Woolworths. 

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