The "things that make you realise you're getting older" thread

[Harry's Lad]

7 minutes ago, PestiRed said:

at least you can take pocket money from them now

My hands have never been out of my bloody pocket.

[Special K]

I was lucky enough to go to Dave Grohl's show in London on Monday night. The theatre was tiny and the seats have left my back in fucking agony. It's Friday morning and I'm still finding it difficult to move properly.

[Bruce Spanner]

24 minutes ago, Special K said:

I was lucky enough to go to Dave Grohl's show in London on Monday night. The theatre was tiny and the seats have left my back in fucking agony. It's Friday morning and I'm still finding it difficult to move properly.

 

Put your preconceptions aside and do a little yoga, it is a game changer.

 

There are loads of videos on youtube you can do at home without a soul watching.

 

Twenty minutes here and there and you'll notice a world of difference.

[Section_31]

On 16/09/2021 at 22:24, Captain Turdseye said:

Are we all staying on this forum for life and watching each other die off?

 

 

GF, 2055. 

 

 

 

"What's your favourite episode of Airwolf?" 

 

"Hi all, new poster here, just wondering what you all think of this pics doing the rounds from the weekend about Yakubu's recent 27th birthday bash, and whether you think Stevie G's grandson has what it takes to keep his place at left back?" 

 

"Fuck off Noob."

 

"My nan said Internet forums were like this, that's why nobody goes on them anymore since they invented quantum computing and AI."

 

"Pics or GTFO." 

 

 

[Special K]

14 minutes ago, Bruce Spanner said:

 

Put your preconceptions aside and do a little yoga, it is a game changer.

 

There are loads of videos on youtube you can do at home without a soul watching.

 

Twenty minutes here and there and you'll notice a world of difference.

I'm more than happy to give it a go.

 

My wife suffers from chronic back pain and she's dosed me up with her painkillers. While that makes me high as a kite it's not permanently shifting the pain

[Section_31]

I'm gonna give Yoga a go at some point. Mrs tried it once and she said everyone was farting, sounds boss. 

[tokyojoe]

My ex did yoga once. Fell asleep in a large class.

[Babb'sBurstNad]

1 hour ago, Section_31 said:

I'm gonna give Yoga a go at some point. Mrs tried it once and she said everyone was farting, sounds boss. 

I've been there. One for the small pleasures thread, managing to slooooowly release a massive fart in a crowded yoga class, feeling all pleased the 10 minute sphincter workout culminated in no noticeable noise or smell.

[VladimirIlyich]

I'd definitely give Yoga a try. I'd use it to recover from visits to the gym which are killing me at my age.

[Elite]

You have to be careful which Yoga/Pilates you do, the ones in some gyms are fucking ridiculous and some of the movements can cause more damage. Look for the 'clinical' classes as they are usually led by physios and not some numpty with a level 1 in yoga or some shit.

[Harry's Lad]

Finding out you are actually older than this....thing.

 

 

[PestiRed]

Bugger yoga - going all the way to a class to feel like a tit for an hour in front of pensioners. A few basic core exercises at home every day like planks, bird dogs and bicycle crunches will take 15 minutes and achieve the same if not more

[Ezekiel 25:17]

Just been on holiday with her for 7 days to ayia napa, I was an absolute wreck after 4 days of none stop drinking, physically and mentally and it was like water off a ducks back to her, me an unfit 39 year old, her a fit 30 year old, jesus I couldn't wait to get home. She goes to boot camp three times a week and I go to Boots three times a week.

[lifetime fan]

20 hours ago, Section_31 said:

"Ooooh I'm 28 look at my working bladder and intact dreams!"

 

Negged.

Negged for not negging him. 

[lifetime fan]

18 hours ago, RJ Fan club said:

Looking at pension statements then thinking about a nice camper van. But one with a bit more comfort and a solid bathroom.

 

ideally one that can dispose of a pound of mashed up Dundee cake without a trace. 

That’s a Motorhome not a camper van you old bastard. 

[lifetime fan]

10 hours ago, PestiRed said:

I can tell people in their 30’s that I’m old enough to be their dad

And the fucking rest! 
 

From memory you’re 2/3 years older than me…and a girl in my year at school is a grandmother to a 10 year old lad. 
 

The mucky bitch. 

[Section_31]

3 hours ago, Ezekiel 25:17 said:

Just been on holiday with her for 7 days to ayia napa, I was an absolute wreck after 4 days of none stop drinking, physically and mentally and it was like water off a ducks back to her, me an unfit 39 year old, her a fit 30 year old, jesus I couldn't wait to get home. She goes to boot camp three times a week and I go to Boots three times a week.

I've got to admit, when you checked in there on Facebook it sent a shiver down my spine. 

[PestiRed]

1 hour ago, lifetime fan said:

And the fucking rest! 
 

From memory you’re 2/3 years older than me…and a girl in my year at school is a grandmother to a 10 year old lad. 
 

The mucky bitch. 

Yeah, I was referring to civilised people rather than Bristolians. I could probably be a great grandfather to a whole tribe of 6-fingered monsters down there

[lifetime fan]

1 minute ago, PestiRed said:

Yeah, I was referring to civilised people rather than Bristolians. I could probably be a great grandfather there

It wouldn’t surprise me in the slightest if she was a great grandmother in the next 3 years. 

[sir roger]

Went to phone my daughter to see how her night out with her friends went and noticed she was ' last seen ' on whatsapp at 5.36am. I needed to have a sit down at even the thought of still being out at that time.

[Section_31]

7 minutes ago, sir roger said:

Went to phone my daughter to see how her night out with her friends went and noticed she was ' last seen ' on whatsapp at 5.36am. I needed to have a sit down at even the thought of still being out at that time.

 

Yeah it's mad now, very continental, they drink in the house and often don't go out until midnight.

 

Back in the day if I wasn't in the pub by 8pm I'd have a panic attack. You only had a few hours a week to get tanked and it required military precision. Few hours in the pub, insist you're not going the club, go the club at midnight, in there til 2am, kebap and bed.

[tokyojoe]

9 minutes ago, Section_31 said:

 

Yeah it's mad now, very continental, they drink in the house and often don't go out until midnight.

 

Back in the day if I wasn't in the pub by 8pm I'd have a panic attack. You only had a few hours a week to get tanked and it required military precision. Few hours in the pub, insist you're not going the club, go the club at midnight, in there til 2am, kebap and bed.

What the fuck's a kebap?

[Stouffer]

Just now, tokyojoe said:

What the fuck's a kebap?

Getthefuckouttahere.

 

Extra large mixto kebap with chilli and salad.

 

Drooling here.

[YorkshireRed]

1 minute ago, tokyojoe said:

What the fuck's a kebap?

I think they call it a kebarm in Liverpool. In Yorkshire we call it a kebreadcake. 

[VERBAL DIARRHEA]

I’m 54 at Christmas and a walking ache, sport and work has caught up with me in the last year. Painkillers all round.