The "things that make you realise you're getting older" thread

[tokyojoe]

20's terrific. 30's shite (married). Early 40's still shite, sorting out the leftovers from the 30's. Mid 40's and onwards, yeah, not too bad.

[Bjornebye]

11 minutes ago, tokyojoe said:

20's terrific. 30's shite (married). Early 40's still shite, sorting out the leftovers from the 30's. Mid 40's and onwards, yeah, not too bad.

We are talking about age not decades mate although yeah I bet the early 40's was shite 

[tokyojoe]

40 minutes ago, Bjornebye said:

We are talking about age not decades mate although yeah I bet the early 40's was shite 

Cheeky twat.

[Bjornebye]

2 minutes ago, tokyojoe said:

Cheeky twat.

Hahaha

[VERBAL DIARRHEA]

Got moaned at to go for an Asthma review and got ambushed for all sorts, blood tests pending. Had not been for them in years, knew I should but I’m a soft cunt.

Feel good today after second jab though.

[tokyojoe]

Still got my own teeth.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

And my stunning boyish good looks.

[Davelfc]

1 hour ago, tokyojoe said:

Still got my own teeth.

 

 

 

In a jar doesn't count. 

[tokyojoe]

22 minutes ago, Impostor said:

In a jar doesn't count. 

I suppose I asked for that.....

[Preston Red]

Stepson is trying arrange his stag do and it involves lots of drinking.

 

"Can't be fucked with that shit!" says my inner old bastard.

[Dr Nowt]

Started a 6 week fitness challenge yesterday at a local strength and conditioning gym. Had the crystal clear thought ‘You are in the wrong place, my friend’. During the warm-up. Walking like a cowboy who’s found himself in Shawshank prison showers accompanied by The Sisters.

[DalyanPete]

When the dentist during check up say,

"1- -4, 5,6,7,- - -11."

Which then leads to eating a cashew nut and your mouth is like a tumble dryer spinning the fucka round and round for hours.

 

[lifetime fan]

Having reminders on your phone which colour bin it’s meant to be put out each week. 

[Paulie Dangerously]

Having children constantly reference things from YouTube or the Internet that I have no concept of despite considering myself IT literate. 

 

Roblox

DJ Marshmello 

Fortnight "seasons"

Unboxings

 

The brief return of pokemon cards was great because I had some point of reference, but they've been banned due to covid concerns. 

[VladimirIlyich]

10 minutes ago, Paulie Dangerously said:

Having children constantly reference things from YouTube or the Internet that I have no concept of despite considering myself IT literate. 

 

Roblox

DJ Marshmello 

Fortnight "seasons"

Unboxings

 

The brief return of pokemon cards was great because I had some point of reference, but they've been banned due to covid concerns. 

Unboxings are everywhere on almost every type of item you can imagine. The other stuff you mention I have no idea of either.

[Section_31]

Went to the Liverpool shop to get my uncle a retro shirt for his birthday. Said to the lad 'it's nice this shirt, it's from 2001/2. 

 

"I wouldn't know mate, I wasn't born." 

 

Cunt. 

[Mudface]

I popped up to the shop before, and there were a bunch of kids messing about outside. As I walked past, one of them said, 'If you get my phone out the bin, I'll give you a wank.'

 

He probably wasn't talking to me and it would no doubt be a shit wank as he was only about 14, but still, that's the most action I've had all year.

[stringvest]

On 24/06/2021 at 22:56, Colonel Kurtz said:

I’ve finally accepted the inevitable 

 and started playing walking football after 40 years of Sunday league/5 a side. I feel properly old tonight. 

try and resist the urge to do the Benny Hill walk.  Hold on to your dignity.

[Bjornebye]

On 29/06/2021 at 20:52, Mudface said:

I popped up to the shop before, and there were a bunch of kids messing about outside. As I walked past, one of them said, 'If you get my phone out the bin, I'll give you a wank.'

 

He probably wasn't talking to me and it would no doubt be a shit wank as he was only about 14, but still, that's the most action I've had all year.

Mudface looking in bins as he walked past

 

 

 

[Elite]

Ear hairs. They grow at crazy angles in the most awkward parts of the ear. I've nearly ended up doing a Van Gough a few times with the razor as those grooming shavers can't get near them.

[dockers_strike]

15 minutes ago, Elite said:

Ear hairs. They grow at crazy angles in the most awkward parts of the ear. I've nearly ended up doing a Van Gough a few times with the razor as those grooming shavers can't get near them.

So true! The side trimmers on my Philishave do a good job on them though. Now nose hair, fuck me, you have to pluck them out otherwise you look like you have trees growing out of your nose!

[VERBAL DIARRHEA]

25 minutes ago, Elite said:

Ear hairs. They grow at crazy angles in the most awkward parts of the ear. I've nearly ended up doing a Van Gough a few times with the razor as those grooming shavers can't get near them.

I use tweezers to get the fuckers.

[Elite]

13 minutes ago, VERBAL DIARRHEA said:

I use tweezers to get the fuckers.

Ouch.

[Lario]

Arms not being long enough to read the paper anymore.

 

Need glasses really, but I'm gonna hold off until I wrap the car around a tree.

[VERBAL DIARRHEA]

18 minutes ago, Elite said:

Ouch.

It does hurt but it’s eye water effective.

[VERBAL DIARRHEA]

7 minutes ago, Lario said:

Arms not being long enough to read the paper anymore.

 

Need glasses really, but I'm gonna hold off until I wrap the car around a tree.

Will fuck your eyes up more. Get the gigs.