Top Ten Conspiracy Theories

[Anubis]

Not sure if everybody saw about that UFO that crash landed in Canada a few days ago as there seems to have been a massive worldwide government controlled media black out. I only heard because someone posted this on Facebook

 

http://earthweareone.com/ufo-crash-lands-in-canada-government-cover-up-as-we-speak/

 

Kudos to our new alien prisoners for making their ship look exactly like a really big common Earth stud fastner.

[Bobby Hundreds]

Was Diana in on this?

Diana is still alive she makes her money as a Flash Gordon lookalike in Abu dhabi.

[Guest Numero Veinticinco]

Diana is still alive she makes her money as a Flash Gordon lookalike in Abu dhabi.

Ah, makes sense. Is she married to Alf Highhead?

[General Dryness]

Not sure if everybody saw about that UFO that crash landed in Canada a few days ago as there seems to have been a massive worldwide government controlled media black out. I only heard because someone posted this on Facebook

 

http://earthweareone.com/ufo-crash-lands-in-canada-government-cover-up-as-we-speak/

 

The witness on the scene is called "Brent Mancheese".

 

And for that reason, I'm out.

[sybian]

Thats not a UFO thats Charlie Adams penalty.

[VladimirIlyich]

Thats not a UFO thats Charlie Adams penalty.

You know the rules.

[Total Longo]

The witness on the scene is called "Brent Mancheese".

 

And for that reason, I'm out.

 

For that reason, i'm in.

[Red Dawn]

Ahh..UFO's ..remember them?....... Have UFOs Gone Out of Style?

It seems that like any trend, conspiracy theories go in and out of style. At this point, Bigfoot and UFOs, while objects of perpetual interest, have ceased being subjects of legitimate study and investigation. Sure, the UFO phenomenon continues to have its diehard proponents, but the relative paucity of new evidence compared to the incredible proliferation of camera equipment seem to have largely laid to rest mainstream interest in the UFO question.

Let’s take a look at that Canadian UFO crash. It seems there was indeed something in the ice of military interest on Feb. 18. Pictures of military vehicles near Jackhead, Canada abound on Twitter:

 

 

 

However, beyond obvious fakes, no one seems to have any photos of the actual UFO crash site. The nearest is this one:

 

 

Passed around as evidence of… something (one conspiracy theorist, desperate to make something of it, overlaid a strange ziggurat structure for comparison), a reverse image search quickly reveals this kind of ice upheaval to be a common byproduct of the long Lake Winnipeg winters. Check it out right here.

 

UPDATE: Even this single piece of evidence turns out to be baloney. As Jared points out in the credits, the photo is actually a cropped portion of the Lake Winnipeg photo found by a reverse image search.

In other words, with one of the biggest UFO incidents of the year, the evidence collected amounts to pictures of military trucks on a Canadian highway.

 

The official story states that the supposed UFO cover-up was simple military drills. The commanding officer of the 38 Territorial Battalion Group told CBC News, “There’s no aliens, just my friends in the air force who are out there helping us on this exercise… I have the commander of that air force contingent sitting right beside me and, you know, he assures us that that was not a UFO, but that was him.”

Sounds like a pretty convenient story for a UFO cover-up to maintain. Is there any evidence that these drills were scheduled? Why yes, here’s the announcement for Exercise Arctic Bison, which “will provide realistic and challenging scenarios in harsh environments to the ARCG to ensure readiness for events that may arise. The exercise scenario will include response to a major air disaster, support to Ground Search and Rescue, and public relations activities in some communities along the shore of Lake Winnipeg.”

 

Debunking aside, it’s curious that the UFO community in the days of the Internet and universal camera carrying is reduced to such weak sauce. What happened to all the hoaxers chucking pie tins into the air and taking snapshots?

 

For now, there are no easy answers. It seems to be a combination of factors, including post-9/11 interest in government-centric conspiracies. It seems that for today’s conspiracy theorists threats are primarily from shady international geopolitics and false flag operations.

 

Another possibility is that YouTube and the Internet has taken the financial incentive out of UFO hoaxing. The national cottage industry of UFO publications, UFO cults, and UFO conventions are no longer necessary in the age of the r/UFO subreddit. There’s no longer financial incentive to fake a UFO sighting, meaning that the UFO subculture has lost a significant chunk of its hucksters.

 

Would anybody believe that spending the money on a fake alien autopsy would recoup its investment today?

[General Dryness]

For that reason, i'm in.

 

You are Brent Mancheese, and I claim my superpowers of alien origin.

[Bobby Hundreds]

Years ago I read a book called transformation America about some woman who said she was raped by Clinton, Dick Cheney, loads of top brass and they were all into peadophilia and sacrifice and all kinds of mad shit. Totally bonkers book. I've probably already mentioned it in this thread but since I was abducted by kim basinger and fingered by her handbag my memory is a little hazy.

[AngryOfTuebrook]

Not sure if everybody saw about that UFO that crash landed in Canada a few days ago as there seems to have been a massive worldwide government controlled media black out. I only heard because someone posted this on Facebook

 

http://earthweareone.com/ufo-crash-lands-in-canada-government-cover-up-as-we-speak/

Anyone heard from Nunavut Patrick?  Or have they got to him too?

 

 

Damn, man!  How deep does this go?

[General Dryness]

Anyone heard from Nunavut Patrick?  Or have they got to him too?

 

 

Damn, man!  How deep does this go?

 

He's working under his deep cover name now.

 

Chad Buncake.

[Anubis]

Anyone heard from Nunavut Patrick?  Or have they got to him too?

 

 

Damn, man!  How deep does this go?

 

NP's busy running some tests and saving the world.

 

 

 

[Dr Nowt]

[Einch]

What the fuck is that from?

[Guest Numero Veinticinco]

What the fuck is that from?

By the sound of it, the Express.

[Dr Nowt]

What the fuck is that from?

 

It's from m̶y̶someone's blog.

[Lee909]

Had to look that article up,what can you say?

 

Yet another theory that has been gaining traction and deserves serious consideration is that America’s massive science-industrial complex is attempting a most dangerous experiment. Since Lyndon Johnson’s presidency, we have seen a grave movement towards science-based strategic thinking in all forms of national policy. Whole swathes of government have been taken over by academic PhDs with an intense obsession with scientism. From the National Science Board to the Department of Education, from NASA to the National Institute of Standards, a powerful cadre of elite intellectuals is seizing control. A common thread amongst these activist bureaucrats is a love of science over God.

 

Links to Radical Atheist Movement

 

President George W. Bush famously fought against the scientists entrenched in his administration. At many points they promoted evolution “theory” and “global warming” over good old-fashioned common sense. They tried to uproot Christianity in our schools through activist judges. And while President Bush fought the good fight, he ultimately did not win the battle. The long line of anti-theists ruling the inner halls of power since Lyndon Johnson remained in control.

 

So what is at the heart of this secret society of globalist atheism? One of their most significant concerns is the power of Faith. They despise the Glory of Jesus and the hope that He brings to countless Americans. The atheists are so insanely dedicated to their obscene cult they will try just about anything to destroy every remnant of Christian Love on this earth. As this sickening obsession was wed to advances in aerial spraying technology in the last century, one can surmise the evil compound that resulted. In this formula, it seems quite logical that the atheist’s next step would be to attempt the widespread murder of Jesus’s very Heavenly Agents of Love.

 

Angels. They are much more than a Christian bedtime story. They are much more than the sweet flutterings in the ears of believers. Angels are quite literally the factory workers of faith. They are tireless and everywhere. They accomplish innumerable feats, from minor pangs of guilt to the throbbing passions of love. The angels are there to guide us, to inspire us and, ultimately, to remind us of our obligation to Jesus. The fly through the air at His beckoning. They are gentle and ever willing. We would be far less human and humane were it not for the angels. And that is exactly why atheists fear the power of angels.

 

The top secret “EROS” government facility, where data of the efficacy of chemtrails is gathered by atheist scientists.

 

Atheists shake with contempt at the thought of love and decency. Their whole lives are dedicated to nothingness, to the gaping void of pain that nihilism defines. Indeed, atheists love pain. They love pain in their sexual rituals, in their drug addictions and in their secret globalist power schemes. Why do we have war? It’s the atheists who spread contempt of God and invite such reckless notions of communism and Islam.

 

Will Atheistic Science Annihilate Love and Prayer?

 

As secret atheist scientists in government pursue their goals of undermining Jesus in America, it only stands to reason that they would take their battle to the skies. The aerial dogfight is likely a vicious one. Who knows what advances they have made since the days of DDT and Agent Orange. Yet fight on they do, every single day! Our heavens are coated in a thick aerosol haze of spiritual hate and this nation’s faith is sinking.

 

In our lifetime, the United States has been bombarded by supposedly “natural” disasters and terrorist attacks. Religion is at an all time low, while sodomy and perversion are at epic heights. Clearly the overlap of these symptoms with the widespread usage of chemtrails is more than just a coincidence. Clearly the astonishing rise of militant atheism in America must factor in. So what is the ultimate answer to the mystery of the chemtrails? Have Heaven’s angels forsaken us for such an offensive maneuver? Or are they actually losing, dying off in plumes of jetliner butchery? Surely America’s atheists in the great halls of government are asking these very same questions.

 

[Bob]

If just like to say, these nutty American god types are ace and deserve applauding. I'll give my full reasoning in the near future.

[SilverSong]

Agenda 21.

Just saying like.

Runs away.

[Anubis]

Has Kal El been kidnapped by the Paragraph Snatchers?

[Lee909]

Just copied and pasted on my phone mate.

[Red Phoenix]

So according to Christianity, St. Michael can defeat Lucifer and cast him out of heaven. But according to that article, chemtrails are just a bit too much. Fucking has to be a wind up that thing.

[Guest Numero Veinticinco]

So according to Christianity, St. Michael can defeat Lucifer and cast him out of heaven. But according to that article, chemtrails are just a bit too much. Fucking has to be a wind up that thing.

 

No, it's real. As in, it really happened.

[Red Phoenix]

No, it's real. As in, it really happened.

 

Not sure exactly what you mean there, but anyway : I know that the article is fucking daft, but what I meant was that (I'd just woken up actually so should've waited a bit and made a better post.) I think they did it intentionally (that's why I said wind up.) I don't think the writer has done that with any intent of being serious, I simply think that they're taking the piss.

 

It should've probably been posted on The Onion or something.