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2 minutes ago, johnsusername said:

Found this on the landing. After a titanic chase, catch, kill episode I needed a small Jack Daniels to help me calm down. I wasn't going to kill it I usually leave them free in the garden but this twat was heading for the barbecue and no man nor beast disrespects another man's barbecue. 

IMG20210906224817.jpg

IMG20210906224807.jpg

kuz-torched.gif

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6 hours ago, Anubis said:


Linked in that article. 
 

https://www.express.co.uk/news/uk/1463383/false-widows-spider-news-brits-warned-about-environment-uk-heatwave-ont

 

Now they’re biting people in their houses and causing serious damage. It’s best to kill first, ask questions later. 

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Fortunately, we have an eight-headed beast the size of a cow und#r the kitchen floor calling the shots here. After lengthy negotiations, she's agreed to send her childr£n over the road to that annoying cunt with the yappy d)g. In return, we'll let her 'take her true form' without calling the army in prematurely.

 

I'm not sure if it's relev@nt, but the local paper had an article on the remarkable lack of !nsects and birds in a one mile radius of our village. There's several leaflets going round about missing pets now. I'm not sure if I've done the right thing, but she's calling me to be milked and I'm finding it hard to ty[[[[[[[[ anyTh[[aaaa els@#'.

 

F[ck!ng Edinb%rgh TSOP man

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On 16/08/2021 at 03:43, The-Sir said:

Had to rescue this little guy tonight. When I took the lid off the tin I'd captured him in he wasn't there though... 

IMG-20210814-WA0020.jpeg

Where the fuck do you live? 

 

And how much rent does your spider master charge you? The fucking size of him. I'd definitely have to burn the house down if I found him in mine. It'd be the only logical solution. 

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On 11/09/2021 at 09:06, chrisbonnie said:

Where the fuck do you live? 

 

And how much rent does your spider master charge you? The fucking size of him. I'd definitely have to burn the house down if I found him in mine. It'd be the only logical solution. 

Manchester, unfortunately. 

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Fucking house is full of spiders. I wouldnt mind so much but the fuckers leave bits of their eaten food, flies and other bugs, all over the window sills. Have to get me shark on the job and hoover the crap up!

 

By the way, if you want a good hoover, get a shark, far better than the dyson we had. And they have lights on them so you can see where you're hoovering. Beep, beep!

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11 minutes ago, dockers_strike said:

Fucking house is full of spiders. I wouldnt mind so much but the fuckers leave bits of their eaten food, flies and other bugs, all over the window sills. Have to get me shark on the job and hoover the crap up!

 

By the way, if you want a good hoover, get a shark, far better than the dyson we had. And they have lights on them so you can see where you're hoovering. Beep, beep!

 

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1 hour ago, dockers_strike said:

Fucking house is full of spiders. I wouldnt mind so much but the fuckers leave bits of their eaten food, flies and other bugs, all over the window sills. Have to get me shark on the job and hoover the crap up!

 

By the way, if you want a good hoover, get a shark, far better than the dyson we had. And they have lights on them so you can see where you're hoovering. Beep, beep!

I'd rather live with an actual shark than a spider. I hate this thread I don't know why I came in. 

 

That fucking thing @TheSire has posted has shit me up. If he said he lived in Australia or Tatooine fine I guess but up the road? I bet the cunt can jump as well. 

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1 hour ago, Bjornebye said:

I'd rather live with an actual shark than a spider. I hate this thread I don't know why I came in. 

 

That fucking thing @TheSire has posted has shit me up. If he said he lived in Australia or Tatooine fine I guess but up the road? I bet the cunt can jump as well. 

Ha! One of my grown lads is like that. Cant stand spiders and I mean cant stand them.

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1 hour ago, Bjornebye said:

I'd rather live with an actual shark than a spider. I hate this thread I don't know why I came in. 

 

That fucking thing @TheSire has posted has shit me up. If he said he lived in Australia or Tatooine fine I guess but up the road? I bet the cunt can jump as well. 

What has The Sir being able to jump got to do with anything?

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13 minutes ago, dockers_strike said:

Ha! One of my grown lads is like that. Cant stand spiders and I mean cant stand them.

I'm terrified of them. Not little ones but anything over the size of a penny and I get a proper shiver right through me. I'm shit with them. 

6 minutes ago, General Dryness said:

What has The Sir being able to jump got to do with anything?

hahaha. I bet he jumped higher than he thought he could when he saw that Russian spider robot dismantling his wall

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4 minutes ago, Bjornebye said:

I'm terrified of them. Not little ones but anything over the size of a penny and I get a proper shiver right through me. I'm shit with them. 

hahaha. I bet he jumped higher than he thought he could when he saw that Russian spider robot dismantling his wall

He did, but then he punched its head off and lashed it out of the window.

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