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How Do I Boil an Egg?

Section_31

By Section_31,
in GF - General Forum

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Section_31 Grand Master

Section_31

Posted
Posted

I've been waiting for the old girl to get up since 11.30, she's still in bed so it looks like I'll have to do the unthinkable and actually cook my own breakfast.

 

I quite fancy a soft boiled egg and some soldiers, how do I go about this? I googled the same question and it gave me this:

 

I shit you not

 

equation.gif

 

This document is an introduction to of some of the science relevant to preparing boiled eggs. It has evolved from a letter published in the Last Word section of New Scientist magazine (04-April-98) which answered a question by Chris Finn, who asked 'Does anybody have a formula to calculate the boiling time for a soft-boiled egg, given its weight and initial temperature?'.

 

Boiling an Egg

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sh#t waffle Grand Master

sh#t waffle

Posted
Posted

It's fucking difficult though. You can put an egg in for three minutes and it will come out perfect. The next day you take an egg from the same carton, put it in for the same time and it comes out barely boiled at all, with the white not having set at all. Sooo, you try again with another egg from the same carton, put it in for about four minutes and it explodes. In short, get your ma to do it.

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  • 12 years later...
Sugar Ape Grand Master

Sugar Ape

Posted
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Looking for a thread and stumbled across this one. A good example of how many of us, who now have wives and kids, were absolute man babies back in the day. 
 

I probably couldn’t boil or scramble an egg in 2008 and now, I don’t like to boast, I can even make an omelette. 

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Stouffer Grand Master

Stouffer

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11 minutes ago, Elite said:

You'll have to explain that one for me?

Its from the Athletico Mince podcast with Bob Mortimer.

 

He does a character of Peter Beardsley and his missus is a massive egg fan, it's brilliant you should give it a listen.

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Bobby Hundreds Grand Master

Bobby Hundreds

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I got myself an old fashioned missus I guess, she does all the cooking, she's a great cook and baker, when it comes to food I dont do anything. She won't even let me put the shopping away because she's fucking OCD about where stuff goes. Eventually as you get older the saying a way to a man's heart is through his stomach becomes more true or at least the way to keep the heart once the initial fuck phase hits normality.

 

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Elite Grand Master

Elite

Posted
Posted
18 minutes ago, Bobby Hundreds said:

I got myself an old fashioned missus I guess, she does all the cooking, she's a great cook and baker, when it comes to food I dont do anything. She won't even let me put the shopping away because she's fucking OCD about where stuff goes. Eventually as you get older the saying a way to a man's heart is through his stomach becomes more true or at least the way to keep the heart once the initial fuck phase hits normality.

 

Don't rely on her too much, there might come a time when you need to do all that shit yourself. I remember my nan waiting on my grandad hand and foot, he couldn't even make toast by the time he was 70 odd.

 

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Bobby Hundreds Grand Master

Bobby Hundreds

Posted
Posted
44 minutes ago, Elite said:

Don't rely on her too much, there might come a time when you need to do all that shit yourself. I remember my nan waiting on my grandad hand and foot, he couldn't even make toast by the time he was 70 odd.

 

I can do it. Things I cant can easily be learnt in today's world of information.

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Guest

Guest

Posted
Posted

I stil haven't tried to poach an egg since I ruined a saucepan years ago. Water in, swirl, egg in, stuck to bottom, couldn't get it off.

 

It sounds like laws of physics were defied there.

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