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It should be possible to rep everybody in one thread. This is fucking hilarious. Sitting on my couch, laptop on my knees, in fucking tears. Brilliant. I can't wait til that becomes fashion over here. I'm gonna die laughing at one of those silly bastards.

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I explained to my oblivious mates tonight who/what guidos were, so by the schoolboy logic of 'if you've heard of them you must be one of them' I am now supposedly the ring leader of the guidos, the guido master, the all powerful guido, etc, etc.

 

I'm considering turning up at the party we're going to tomorrow with 4 layers of false tan on and a couple of tubs of brylcream on my head, just to call their bluff.

 

This thread was fucking A by the way.

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If you watched a 1960s sci-fi interpretation of what humans would look like in 2008, you'd probably get this:

 

10518982ba5.png

 

Take a moment to marvel at the phenomenon that is Scott Alexander.

 

Scott Alexander

 

"Number one - multi millionaire"

 

Some might say he is a bit full of him self.

Weight: 16 Stone of sliced and diced muscle

Nickname: NUMBER 1

Personal Power Phrases:

"Second place is just NOT an option."

"Weakness, is to trust and rely on others"

"Money is like water, it runs freely out of a tap, you just got to turn that tap hard!!".

Favourite Watch: "Rolex, oyster 2 special addition in solid platinum, covered in diamonds, just like mine!!"

I like to think of him as dead hard.

back.jpg

 

 

Seriously though, he is nothing but a crazy manc roid junkie

with some pretty huge self esteem problems.

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We call them "muzza's" down here.

 

YouTube - summerdayze 2008 muzzas

 

A muzza is a young male, usually of southern European decent (even though they've never been there), that are born and raised Melbournians. Living in middle-class western and northern suburbs they are depicted by their cars..

Usually canary yellow VL turbos (often built by the Rajabs), VN 5 litre's, VQ Statesmans or the R33 Skyline..

 

Baseball caps are constantly worn alongside hair product, but to make sure they dont wreck their hair the caps sit on top of their hair (and away from the fringe). Bum-bags are a must to hold all your mobile phones (one for the bros, and one for the hoes), and also some change to spend at maccas.

 

They walk like they're trying to immitate a scarecrow, or like they're holding a bucket of water in each hand (with a subtle swaying motion) This is often a result of going to the gym once or twice and thinking your lats are so huge you cant put your arms straight down your side.

 

As soon as there's any drizzle outside muzzas call all their bros and go do some demos in your cars.. ripping it up in the wet is considered "free demos" because it doesnt bald your tires as much.

 

Muzzas are often highschool dropouts currently doing apprentiships, with every cent they earn going towards their cars (mostly on tires and petrol), and they end up wondering why all their bros who went to uni end up driving mercs and picking up chicks while they stick to their teeny bopper marias (which are the 13-16yr old female equivalent of a muzza) who are the only chicks who go for these guys.

 

Common hangouts are Bell St maccas, or any other Hungry Jacks 24hour store carpark, but the most common place (which is guarenteed to give you some pure muzzas) has got to be Chapel Street on Friday and Saturday nights. Doing constant and repetitious laps of this popular shopping strip is a must, and ensures many hours of sitting in traffic at 3am on a Saturday morning.

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