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Featured: That was the Week that Was (May 2-6 2022)


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Monday May 2:  

 

Haven’t done of these in a while but I can’t really be going over all of the things I missed because we’d be here forever. The plan was to pick up from today and go from there. However, there’s one thing I needed to cover because it’s pissed me off so much I needed to vent. So I’ll have to go back seven days….

 

The Blues wrote to PMGOL to demand why they weren’t given a penalty when that Anthony Gordon rat did his regular Tom Daley impression as soon as he got in the box. I mean, what exactly are they expecting for an answer? Surely even they have to know what happened there. First and foremost it wasn’t a foul by Matip, so there is that. Even if it was though (which it wasn’t), it wasn’t an egregious enough error to be writing letters of complaint about. 

 

It’s a decision that sometimes you might get if the ref just gets it wrong. And if that happened, VAR wouldn’t have overturned it because that’s not how it works on subjective calls. You actually have some pundits mistakenly saying it’s a pen but I’d say based on what I heard there were more saying it wasn’t. So what you have here is one of those “could go either way” type deals.

 

Everton are the ONLY club in the entire fucking league that would write a letter of complaint over a decision like that. There’s absolutely nobody else that would do that. They’re missing the bigger picture here though. They want to know why the referee didn’t give them the benefit of the doubt on a subjective decision, but the answer to that is fucking easy.

 

It’s because Gordon and Richarlison spent the entire game trying to con the referee and fool him into giving them decisions they didn’t deserve. So when one came along where he probably wasn’t sure, he no doubt weighted it up in his head like this: “Was that a foul or a dive? It could be a foul but how do I know these cunts aren’t just trying to cheat me yet again?”. And so he waved it away, as most people would because it’s human nature.

 

PGMOL should reply by simply reciting the story of the boy who cried wolf. Nothing else, just that story and leave it at that. Crying fat, balding, tory twat.

 

The other thing in play here is that refs have been told to interpret these things differently now and that contact between two players in the box isn’t always a foul because sometimes its the striker who initiates it. The Calvert-Lewin / Lovren one would never be given as a pen now as that’s a classic example of why they’ve changed things. You could also take away 50% of the pens Jamie Vardy has won and 100% of any decisions Shane Long has been given.

 

We suffered from that new interpretation when the ref wrongly decided that Jota initiated the contact at Spurs, but by and large you see a lot less pens given now for the kind of shit Gordon pulled in the derby, and that’s a good thing. Fuck Lampard and fuck Everton.

 

Honestly, the fucking balls on these wankers kicking off over that. It’s like a murderer who kills a dozen people and then gets all wound up and outraged when he’s asked about a thirteenth one that he actually didn’t do. "Why are you picking on me? This isn't fair". Except that doesn’t really work because in that analogy Gordon would have actually been fouled for the pen, and he wasn’t.

 

What else has been happening? Well I've been watching Top Boy on Netflix and I'd highly recommend it. Probably the best way to describe it is like watching Arsenal Fan TV only there's a bit less aggression and fewer threats on Top Boy. Man defo says da ting worth a watch though, fam.

 

Anyway, back to the present. Richarlison threw a flare into the crowd yesterday as they beat Chelsea at Goodison. Firstly, I called that result a week ago. I knew it would happen. Chelsea were always going to shit the bed there, just as Arsenal and United did before them. Those three are going to be responsible for Everton staying up. They should be ashamed of themselves. Chelsea should have their world champions crown taken away immediately. I’m not even joking. Cunts.

 

But yeah, Richarlison has to be suspended for that. Carra got three games for throwing a coin into the crowd and that’s not as dangerous as throwing a fucking lit flare. That also happened in much different times when you could actually do stuff without there being a massive clamour for excessive punishment. Yeah, I’m saying Richarlison should be cancelled, the fucking scumbag.

 

The Blues actually had a banner yesterday with the PL logo and the word ‘corrupt’ underneath it. Was that there in the game after they got screwed on the handball against City, or do they only get upset when a decision goes against them in the derby? I want them down almost as much as I want the quadruple.

 

As for us, Klopp’s press conference today was decent. Usually these CL ones are shite because the questions he gets asked are so fucking lame that not even Klopp can make an interesting answer out of them. Even this one opened with “is the job done?”. I mean fucking hell, what kind of question is that? There isn’t a manager in the world who would say “yeah this one’s over”. The follow up was “just how important is this game in the context of your season?”. IT’S A EUROPEAN CUP SEMI FINAL!! For fuck’s sake.

 

The Spanish ones were shite too. One fella asked Klopp if he’s worried about the amount of times he’s lost away to Spanish teams. Klopp looked baffled and pointed out times when he hadn’t lost, and also made the point that most of the time he lost he went through anyway. He asked the fella how many times he’d been knocked out by Spanish teams and there were crickets on the other end of the headset. Honestly, some of these journos are stealing a living.

 

The best bit of the presser was on Thiago, who a Spanish reporter asked about because he’s not been getting selected for Spain. Klopp said Spain have great midfield players but that Thiago could play in any national team in the world and look like the best player. 

 

That’s true, he often looked like the best player in a star studded Bayern side, and recently he’s looked a level above even in this incredible team. I joked on the pod last week that I’m looking at Thiago recently and wondering if he’s the best player I’ve ever seen. He might be, but it’s way too soon to make that kind of statement.

 

 

 

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Please note that 'the Week that Was' is only available to website subscribers. Subscriptions cost just £3 a month (you need to register first) and can be purchased here. 

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Quote

This trophy decides who it wants to be lifting it, and clearly it fucking hates City. It loves us, but it loves Madrid more. 

Quote

The European Cup didn’t want City’s corrupt paws on it so it did its thing. City fans think it's UEFA conspiring against them when really it's just old big ears itself.

I do love me some personification of the European Cup. 

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We’ve apparently made £100m from this year’s CL run. The question is what to do with it. We could do what Chelsea and City did and buy a Lukaku or Grealish. Or alternatively we could just set fire to it, the end result would be the same.

 

Ahahahahahah

 

That's why you get paid the big bucks, gaffer.

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I totally agree with this?

 

<blockquote class="twitter-tweet"><p lang="en" dir="ltr">José Mourinho in tears after reaching the Conference final. Might not be the biggest final in his career, but man does this show how much he loves the game. Imagine not loving this man. <a href="https://t.co/ZNXoAGqzOq">pic.twitter.com/ZNXoAGqzOq</a></p>&mdash; Xav Salazar (@XavsFutbol) <a href="https://twitter.com/XavsFutbol/status/1522331772838633478?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">May 5, 2022</a></blockquote> <script async src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js" charset="utf-8"></script>

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20 hours ago, Captain Turdseye said:

More diaries, less podcasts please. 

Here’s the thing about the diary. There are only 7 days in a week so there’s an entry for each day. So you can’t really have more diaries. Just the diary. 
 

Here’s the thing about the podcasts. There’s one after every game and others on special occasions. So you can’t really have less of them. 
 

Tough breaks. I guess the people who like both get to enjoy that though, eh?

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3 hours ago, Chris said:

Here’s the thing about the diary. There are only 7 days in a week so there’s an entry for each day. So you can’t really have more diaries. Just the diary. 
 

Here’s the thing about the podcasts. There’s one after every game and others on special occasions. So you can’t really have less of them. 
 

Tough breaks. I guess the people who like both get to enjoy that though, eh?

A day on Uranus takes 17 hours. Therefore more days in a week. Or less. Actually I'm not really sure. 

 

I just saw your name and thought of Uranus. 

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On 07/05/2022 at 13:21, rb14 said:

A welcome return of TWTWTW but a reluctant neg for rissing up the Mourinho quote/pic/gif/tweet.

 

Fixed it now. But this is what it was meant to be...

 

 

 

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