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Premier League Round Up (Dec 10-16 2021)

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Loads to get through and I’ve got very little time to do it, so I’m not going to necessarily stick to the order of games and might end up going off on several tangents.

 

The main theme this week is it’s been a mad week of penalties. So many games were decided by pens and a lot of them were fairly contentious to say the least.

 

I’ll start at Stamford Bridge last weekend where Chelsea were awarded two pens, including one in stoppage time that gave them the points against Leeds, who were later charged with failing to control their players after they protested the decision. I can’t get on board with that, it feels like rubbing salt in the open wounds. Those players had given everything in a fixture where they were given no chance, only to lose it at the death to a soft pen. What are they meant to do, just shrug their shoulders and say “ah well, win some, lose some”?

 

Leeds SHOULD be charged, however, for the pitiful showing they put up at the Etihad a few nights after. That was much more unacceptable than anything they did at Stamford Bridge. They’ve now conceded six to United and seven to City. And this is a team/city that sees Manchester as their mortal enemy. They’ve shown zero pride or fight and just allowed themselves to be humiliated. It’s pathetic. Arsenal like even. Just fucking relegate them. Send them back to the Championship where they belong.

 

In fairness they are literally hamstrung by injuries currently. Phillips is out for a couple of months with a torn hammy and my boy Bamford is out again after doing his while celebrating a goal last week. That’s hard for a thin squad like Leeds to deal with.

 

They were surprisingly good at Chelsea though. Raphinha put them ahead from the spot after Alonso was adjudged to have fouled James. I didn’t think that was a pen initially and it was only the replay behind the goal that convinced me. I thought Alonso made a block tackle and got the ball because of the weird angle it squirmed out, but he didn’t actually get anywhere near it. Good decision.

 

Raphinha’s pen wasn’t convincing. He stuttered, waiting for Mendy to dive, but Mendy didn’t dive. He did really well to stay rooted to the spot, but unfortunately he stayed rooted to the spot after the kick was taken and by the time he moved it was too late. Really weird one that. 

 

Raphinha’s good but he’s got a face I want to slap. I can’t really put my finger on why, but I think it’s the Poundland Richarlison look he has about his grid that I don’t like. Don’t get me wrong, I’d get over it in a hurry if we signed him and I’m not saying his face is anywhere near as bad as Richarlison’s, but there is a similarity there with the permanent look of a smacked arse he has.

 

Reece James should have been sent off for a high, late challenge on his namesake Dan. He got a yellow, but that looks a stonewall red to me and I can’t believe he got away with it and I can’t believe how little was made of it on MOTD. Chelsea equalised soon after too, just to make it worse.

 

Not a great goal to give away that one. Mount finished at the near post but it’s such a strange looking goal because when it goes in you’re thinking “where’s the fucking keeper??”. He’s actually stood in the middle of the goal just watching it, doing nothing. His positioning there was schoolboy stuff. He’s shite him though. He makes some amazing saves at times but overall he’s fucking terrible as some of the goals he lets in I genuinely think I’d save, and you won’t find a worse keeper than me.

 

He let in seven at City and although I’ve only seen one of them (which he was partly culpable for) I’d bet there’s at least three that you can look at and say he should be doing better. He probably made three amazing saves too though.

 

He was beaten by a Jorginho penalty after Raphinha was adjudged to have fouled Rudiger. It could have gone either way but it looked like a clumsy ‘forward’s tackle’ and I don’t think Leeds can complain that was given, even if on another day it might not have been.

 

Joe Gelhardt came off the bench and equalised with his first touch. I’m surprised he didn’t put something on his instagram trolling the Reds for letting him go after that one. Maybe he would have if Chelsea hadn’t gone and won it deep into stoppage time with a somewhat questionable pen. On Rudiger again. There wasn’t much in it and Rudiger milked it for all its worth, but Klich did kick him on the foot and VAR definitely can’t overturn that one as there is clear contact.

 

Jorginho scored again and the closing seconds of the game seemed to be Chelsea players doing all they could to incite a reaction from Leeds. Havertz was doing all he could to provoke trouble and Rudiger was unsurprisingly the first to go steaming in at the first sign of aggro. 

 

He reminds me of Martin Keown. Proper horrible fucker but you want someone like that on your side. Keown was, without a hint of irony, moralising about Rudiger’s antics and saying he’s too aggressive and needs to be calmer. This is like when Souness is frowning on bad tackles. It’s like they’ve forgotten how they played the game.

 

Rudiger’s contract is up this summer and there’s talk that Chelsea are going to give him… wait for it…. 400k a week!!! Fuck me, he’s good but he’s not exactly Joel Matip is he? (Yeah that’s right, forget Virg, I’m setting the high bar with my guy Big Bird now). If he’s getting 400k a week then we can forget about getting Mo signed to a new deal. Oil clubs fucking up the market, as per.

 

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Traore put two chances on plates for his fellow forwards late on but they wasted his good approach work. That’s two assists he didn’t get through no fault of his own which feeds the narrative peddled by most of you reading this that all he does is “run really fast”. You know who you are. And I know who you are. God I hope we sign him just so I can be proved right. He’s a unique, special talent who could be amazing in the right environment.

 

Cry more. Santa doesn't exist. It's never going to happen. Klopp praises him so they'll play him against us to make it easier for us.

 

wwhl warmup tell nice more me love listening juicy interesting flirting flirt cohen andy i'm trending curated GIF

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'an automatic booking.   Seriously, is there such a thing? Seems to me, the issuing of yellow cards is the most random of random things. How many times did Fernandinho get away with that kind of shit over the years?

 

I had a real downer on Gallagher last year when all he seemed to do was dive and kick people, but he's been really impressive this season, especially with him playing a bit further forward. As Viera was saying.....ah, too late, you've nodded off again

 

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5 hours ago, tlw content said:

(I) might end up going off on several tangents.

 

"Might"? Jesus. Talk about no shit Sherlock. 

 

In many ways a great TWTWTW Dave, but you undid all the good work with, well, you absolutely know what you did. You're getting the TLW equivalent of a red card - mega-negged - and as you skulk off the field, there will be no applause from me or anyone else. 

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2 hours ago, DaveT said:

'an automatic booking.   Seriously, is there such a thing? Seems to me, the issuing of yellow cards is the most random of random things. How many times did Fernandinho get away with that kind of shit over the years?

 

 

 

Jimenez was probably stunned to be booked for the blocking of the free kick after watching at least three of his mates being ignored by Chris Kavanagh doing the same against us.

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1 hour ago, index1000 said:

What the fuck is wrong with your boy Bamford? Been injured for ages must be some bad medicine they are giving him.

 

He got injured celebrating a stoppage time equaliser on his comeback. Pulled his hammy after sprinting half the length of the pitch and then doing a knee slide!

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4 hours ago, Red_or_Dead said:

Hate Arsenal, but they did do a tribute to Ray before the West Ham game.

 

 

Probably because there were complaints about them not doing it the game before.

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Dave, did you see Arteta kicking off at Martinelli when he went down injured outside the touchline against West Ham? He yelled at him, picked him back up and forced him to go on to the pitch again and lay down there to waste time.

 

 

Martinelli was clearly in real agony and had to be subbed off, so that was hella funny. Proper shithousery by Arteta

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2 hours ago, dave u said:

I do these deliberate mistakes just to see who is paying attention. Well done those of you that spotted it...

We definitely deserve a free fridge magnet or a shirt, don’t we ? Thanks Dave !

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See, that just re-enforces what I said in the Newcastle report. Are we really expected to believe that if games get stopped every time a player claims a head injury, that cunts like Playmobil head aren't going to encourage players to do it any time the team is under pressure?

 

The reason refs do what Mike Dean did last nighty is because too many players and managers want to cheat at every possible opportunity.

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2 hours ago, dave u said:

Probably because there were complaints about them not doing it the game before.

Good point.  Had the Arsenal West Ham Game on in the back ground, and it did sound a bit half-arsed.

 

 

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15 hours ago, dave u said:

 

He got injured celebrating a stoppage time equaliser on his comeback. Pulled his hammy after sprinting half the length of the pitch and then doing a knee slide!

Give him something for the pain!

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