Christmas 2021

[Creator Supreme]

53 minutes ago, John102 said:

 

Go to sleep kids, or Cliff will come and get you, along with his cabal of creepy kids with candles.

One scary cunt that.

[Jairzinho]

Spain has their own version of Cliff - Raphael.

 

Off the scale nonce vibe.

 

[TheHowieLama]

Liberace: "Hold my beer."

 

 

[Tony Moanero]

Elizabeth Montgomery was ace.

 

[Captain Turdseye]

My twat mother-in-law who lives over the road is having her brother come to stay for like two weeks over Xmas. He arrives on Saturday. Apparently he’s like a recluse, lives like one of the people on those shows about compulsive hoarding. His other sister has had to cut his hair and pack his bags. They’re having to drive an hour and a half to pick him up from Northampton because he can’t be trusted to travel from the North East and change trains in that London. 
 

I’ve been in this family for 10 years and I’ve never even seen a picture of the bloke. 
 

My bird’s mum gingerly asked her the other day if she perhaps knows someone around here that can sort him out with some of his “wacky baccy”

 

Her dad, who I love, has been looking far from impressed every time this visit has been mentioned. Poor bastard not only has to have this fella attached to him for a fortnight, but they’re also meant to be going to stay with Mrs Turdseye’s sister for a few days over Xmas so he’s gonna have to take him there too. I’m getting a strong sense that he’s quietly fuming. 
 

I’ll be honest, I can’t wait. He sounds ace. I’m gonna get wasted with him and tell him his sister’s a cunt. 
 

If Covid puts pay to their trip away, we’ll probably end up over there for Xmas dinner. That’d be one less thing to worry about and they’re better cooks than us…

[Anubis]

I’m beginning to see a pattern emerging here on both sides of the Turdseye family….

[Elite]

That Gloria Hunniford can't say a sentence without mentioning her beloved Cliff.

 

Paedophile sympathising bitch.

[stringvest]

2 minutes ago, Elite said:

That Gloria Hunniford can't say a sentence without mentioning her beloved Cliff.

 

Paedophile sympathising bitch.

Turkey necks voting for Christmas

[Captain Turdseye]

32 minutes ago, Anubis said:

I’m beginning to see a pattern emerging here on both sides of the Turdseye family….

I’m half expecting him to be Carvalho Diablo, who’s been playing the long game from the start.

 

Christmas omelette with peas. Mmmmm. 

[TheHowieLama]

#sir_gotcha

[Bjornebye]

1 hour ago, Captain Turdseye said:

My twat mother-in-law who lives over the road is having her brother come to stay for like two weeks over Xmas. He arrives on Saturday. Apparently he’s like a recluse, lives like one of the people on those shows about compulsive hoarding. His other sister has had to cut his hair and pack his bags. They’re having to drive an hour and a half to pick him up from Northampton because he can’t be trusted to travel from the North East and change trains in that London. 
 

I’ve been in this family for 10 years and I’ve never even seen a picture of the bloke. 
 

My bird’s mum gingerly asked her the other day if she perhaps knows someone around here that can sort him out with some of his “wacky baccy”

 

Her dad, who I love, has been looking far from impressed every time this visit has been mentioned. Poor bastard not only has to have this fella attached to him for a fortnight, but they’re also meant to be going to stay with Mrs Turdseye’s sister for a few days over Xmas so he’s gonna have to take him there too. I’m getting a strong sense that he’s quietly fuming. 
 

I’ll be honest, I can’t wait. He sounds ace. I’m gonna get wasted with him and tell him his sister’s a cunt. 
 

If Covid puts pay to their trip away, we’ll probably end up over there for Xmas dinner. That’d be one less thing to worry about and they’re better cooks than us…

He's gonna bum you and I reckon he's been planning it. 

[Captain Turdseye]

9 minutes ago, Bjornebye said:

He's gonna bum you and I reckon he's been planning it. 

 

1 hour ago, Captain Turdseye said:

 

I’ll be honest, I can’t wait.

 

[Bjornebye]

 

 

[AngryOfTuebrook]

 

[Bjornebye]

2 hours ago, AngryOfTuebrook said:

 

Hahahahahahahahaha not seen that clip in years. Outstanding 

[AngryOfTuebrook]

[Tony Moanero]

A GF Christmas thread isn’t the same without input from @Champ.

[Remmie]

22 hours ago, AngryOfTuebrook said:

 

One of my all time favourite comedy moments that, repped

[Preston Red]

22 hours ago, AngryOfTuebrook said:

 

Christmas tradition in our house is watching that episode.

 

Duly repped, sir. 

[Preston Red]

 

 

 

[KMD7]

6 minutes ago, Preston Red said:

 

 

 

Hahahaha. Love Bottom.

[Preston Red]

20 minutes ago, KMD7 said:

Hahahaha. Love Bottom.

"Now, come on! It's time! Let's get our big ones out!!!"

[Captain Turdseye]

On 15/12/2021 at 19:41, Captain Turdseye said:

My twat mother-in-law who lives over the road is having her brother come to stay for like two weeks over Xmas. He arrives on Saturday. Apparently he’s like a recluse, lives like one of the people on those shows about compulsive hoarding. His other sister has had to cut his hair and pack his bags. They’re having to drive an hour and a half to pick him up from Northampton because he can’t be trusted to travel from the North East and change trains in that London. 
 

I’ve been in this family for 10 years and I’ve never even seen a picture of the bloke. 
 

My bird’s mum gingerly asked her the other day if she perhaps knows someone around here that can sort him out with some of his “wacky baccy”

 

Her dad, who I love, has been looking far from impressed every time this visit has been mentioned. Poor bastard not only has to have this fella attached to him for a fortnight, but they’re also meant to be going to stay with Mrs Turdseye’s sister for a few days over Xmas so he’s gonna have to take him there too. I’m getting a strong sense that he’s quietly fuming. 
 

I’ll be honest, I can’t wait. He sounds ace. I’m gonna get wasted with him and tell him his sister’s a cunt. 
 

If Covid puts pay to their trip away, we’ll probably end up over there for Xmas dinner. That’d be one less thing to worry about and they’re better cooks than us…

 

Going over for a roast after the match tonight. 
 

I’m buying wine. 

[tokyojoe]

Having given up on the sheer hopelessness of the Boots.com website I now come to realisation of the amount of stuff I still have to wrap for HI.

 

She's also taking the piss by saying she wants a 'Christmas Stocking' which is full of small shit, each will take a millenium to wrap. It takes me a fornight to wrap a box of chocs.

 

I might try and do a deal with the (fit) lass who works down our local who says she loves wrapping presents.

 

She will of course be suitably rewarded.

[Bjornebye]

1 minute ago, tokyojoe said:

 

I might try and do a deal with the (fit) lass who works down our local who says she loves wrapping presents.

 

She will of course be suitably rewarded.