Everton (A) - Wed 1st December 2021 (8:15pm)

[Trumo 16,086]

The shite, managed by an ex-Liverpool boss the Everton fans have long derided to be a fat Spanish waiter, at the pit on Wednesday night, live on Amazon Prime. Not a sentence anyone would have thought possible little over a decade ago, and yet here we are. The name in the hot-seat may have changed from last year, but bloody hell do we owe this lot. Many of last year’s problems had their roots in this fixture, and what the mongrels got away with beggars belief. Incidentally, that's two managers they've had who've exchanged the Bernabeu for the Barn Of Boo in recent years, on top of another who exchanged the Boo Camp for the Nou Camp. Anyway:

 

Front foot. Urgency. Up-tempo football. Utter domination. Creativity. Know-how!

 

I don’t ask for much.

 

Yeah, last year’s game was practically a blueshite fan’s wet dream. They are more bothered about fucking us up than actually beating us. They love to see their players try to cripple ours. They love to roll out the blue carpet for fans of club that are ‘rivals’ to us, laying on the sandwich platters and having their heads patted by people who openly sing about the city and Scousers being workshy dole-queuing hubcap-stealing Neanderthals who eat rats as a treat in their slums. They love it when their team gets a pasting by these so-called ‘rivals’ because it makes things harder for our team. They love David Fucking Coote.

 

I’d never heard of him before that day, but it’s safe to say I know that fucking idiot now. Even Boris the Biff would struggle to make such a hash of things. Two wrong VAR decisions that left me cursing Coote’s dad for not pulling out of his mum at the opportune moment! Sadio had given us an early lead. T-Rex Arms and his reckless lunge put Virg out for the season. Two headed goals conceded. Mo curling in a belter with almost no backlift. And then Hendo denied a last-minute winner when Sadio’s elbow was adjudged to be a millimetre offside. You can’t score a goal with your elbow but that didn’t matter to Coote. He and PGMOL were firmly on the side of looking to rule out perfectly legitimate goals for the most minor of infractions (or non-infractions), and we were on the receiving end of this shit all season.

 

Of course we’ve had much better days at the woodshed. I could have pulled up any number of famous away wins (“Rushie scored 4!” anyone?) but I’ve chosen 6th December 1969. Shanks’ lads made the short trip to take on Harry Catterick’s Blues and their “Holy Trinity” of Ball, Kendall and Harvey. Breezeblock Head Joe Royle played up front for them. It was a side that would claim the league title that very season. By contrast, ours was a side that was in the process of being broken up as many of the manager’s stalwarts no longer had the legs. In this game it didn’t show though, as both the effervescent Emlyn Hughes and striking understudy Bobby Graham got on the scoresheet in a resounding 3-0 win. The game is best remembered for one of the greatest own goals ever. Certainly the greatest in a derby. Step forward Sandy Brown and your magnificent diving header.

 

 

The big film in early December 1969 is another piece of utter magnificence. George Roy Hill directed it. Paul Newman and Robert Redford became box office gold off the back of it. Katharine Ross played it perfectly understated. Butch Cassidy And The Sundance Kid is an endlessly quotable, enormously enjoyable caper where the charismatic leader of a gang of railroad bank robbers and the fastest gunslinger in the West try to escape the mysterious white-hatted bounty hunter Lafors and his team of trackers, going as far as Bolivia. The film is so well done, you can forgive the Burt Bacharach musical number and long montage sequence in the middle of the film. Somehow they don’t detract from the whole experience. Butch’s last line is an absolute gem to go out on. Fuego!

 

 

We know from experience that Rafa favours pragmatism over expansive football, and I wouldn’t expect any different here. I’ve no idea what overall shape his team are in because they just look like Everton regardless. They’re about where I’d expect them to be. We’ve had an excellent week and the worry would be that we then go and lay an egg on Wednesday night. But this is a group of players that know how to get a job done, and Jurgen’s list of available options is slowly increasing as players make their way back from lay-offs and others find a bit of form. We know we have what it takes to go there and win. Just go there and do it, and make their fans once again be like that guy in the gif.

 

 

[Pete 1,904]

Get out there and TWAT them

[Harry Squatter 13,653]

They cannot defend set pieces to save their lives. Need some good deliveries from trent and hopefully Van Dijk, Matip/Konate and Fabinho can score a few. 

[xabi the red 130]

my wife's due to give birth to our first kid (son) on Wednesday...nervous as hell. not about the Derby though 

[Rushies tash 2,763]

23 minutes ago, xabi the red said:

my wife's due to give birth to our first kid (son) on Wednesday...nervous as hell. not about the Derby though 

Good luck mate, although to warn you in advance, our first was two weeks late.

[Jairzinho 25,275]

40 minutes ago, xabi the red said:

my wife's due to give birth to our first kid (son) on Wednesday...nervous as hell. not about the Derby though 

Divock or Divocki, presumably. 

[Anubis 21,355]

 

[Rick Sanchez C-137 5,841]

1 hour ago, xabi the red said:

my wife's due to give birth to our first kid (son) on Wednesday...nervous as hell. not about the Derby though 

 

Welcome to the world, Mohammed Sadio TheRed

[Creator Supreme 1,695]

2-0 to the shite, saves Rafa's hide!

[Reckoner 2,113]

I hope we hammer them and the second half plays out to Rafa songs from the travelling kop.

[VladimirIlyich 9,466]

1 hour ago, Rushies tash said:

Good luck mate, although to warn you in advance, our first was two weeks late.

Ours was too.

[manwiththestick 5,151]

31 minutes ago, Reckoner said:

I hope we hammer them and the second half plays out to Rafa songs from the travelling kop.

And Merry Christmas Everton, it's almost traditional now.

[Reckoner 2,113]

16 minutes ago, manwiththestick said:

And Merry Christmas Everton, it's almost traditional now.

Oh it’s definitely traditional!

[AngryOfTuebrook 24,031]

Excellent opener, @Trumo - great film, hilarious own goal and an acronym inspired by TLW's favourite gif.

 

Last season's match was the start of a season-long cheese-dream that's best forgotten. There's no better way to shit that out of our collective system than playing these deluded bums off the park and sending them back down the M53/A55 with Rafa's name and "Liverpool, Liverpool, Take the piss" ringing in their ears.

More goals, another clean sheet and no injuries, please.

Just get these beat, Reds.

[cloggypop 11,730]

4 hours ago, Rushies tash said:

Good luck mate, although to warn you in advance, our first was two weeks late.

Newcastle then

[an tha 8,226]

I want to see us tear into these with mad intent....kind of intensity and desire and tempo that blows them away....hands them a proper fucking lesson.

 

It still narks me greatly how we meekly lay down for them at Anfield last season - just timidly surrendering a 20 ish year unbeaten home derby record and a 10 ish year unbeaten in all derbies record.....especially after what happened at the pit.

 

It was disgraceful how we showed zero fight, no desire for revenge/to right the wrongs of that day and how we just rolled over for them.

 

Wednesday has to be payback time....big fucking time.

[TD_LFC 656]

We're gonna have a mad starting 11 is about the only guarantee I can make.

 

Wouldn't be surprised in the slightest if Minamino and/or Origi start and one of Thiago/Henderson/Fabinho are rested.

[suzy 3,305]

Interesting Jurgen in his MoTD interview said he wasn’t really looking forward to the game and something like he didn’t like all the noise surrounding it.

Don’t blame him and I’m just hoping for no injuries this year and 3 points of course.

[sh#t waffle 1,726]

12 hours ago, Anubis said:

 

FAO xabi the red: this is unproven advice for a woman in labour, so be sure to check with your Midwife first 

[Anubis 21,355]

50 minutes ago, suzy said:

Interesting Jurgen in his MoTD interview said he wasn’t really looking forward to the game and something like he didn’t like all the noise surrounding it.

Don’t blame him and I’m just hoping for no injuries this year and 3 points of course.

I liked the line “ We’re going to play football. Let’s see what the opponent does.”

[KMD7 9,383]

12 hours ago, Rick Sanchez C-137 said:

 

Welcome to the world, Pickford Own Goal TheRed

 

[Harry Squatter 13,653]

They are all outraged by Klopp now. At least he didn't call them a small club. Like their manager. 

 

[aws 7,966]

Maybe we were so timid because Jurgen had warned us to avoid injury.  

[stringvest 14,063]

13 hours ago, xabi the red said:

my wife's due to give birth to our first kid (son) on Wednesday...nervous as hell. not about the Derby though 

good luck - exciting times!

[an tha 8,226]

The very first thing you have to do in the derby is be ready to fight....you win the fight then you win the right to play football and impose your quality on them.