Jump to content
  • Sign up for free and receive a month's subscription

    You are viewing this page as a guest. That means you are either a member who has not logged in, or you have not yet registered with us. Signing up for an account only takes a minute and it means you will no longer see this annoying box! It will also allow you to get involved with our friendly(ish!) community and take part in the discussions on our forums. And because we're feeling generous, if you sign up for a free account we will give you a month's free trial access to our subscriber only content with no obligation to commit. Register an account and then send a private message to @dave u and he'll hook you up with a subscription.

Euro 2020 Round Up (Days 1-3)


tlw content
 Share

Recommended Posts

Two months ago I’d made up my mind I wasn’t going to watch a single minute of the Euros, other than maybe Scotland games. I just wanted the season over and then the plan was to forget about footy completely until August. Then the Reds went on a run, we finished the season well, fans were back in stadiums and suddenly… well, footy didn’t seem quite so bad.

 

Plus I need you to keep subscribing over the summer and I have to give something back in return, so here we are with the round ups again.

 

First off, and long time readers will be expecting this, the thing I’ve been looking forward to the most - the Italian National Anthem. Fucking sensational. After watching that before the opening game I toyed with the idea of switching off as that was definitely going to be the highlight of the whole tournament for me. Hopefully they go all the way to to the final. Not arsed if they win it or not but the more times we see that the better.

 

I have to say the Turkish players belted out their anthem with just as much gusto but the tune was shit so it’s entirely forgettable. Makes me laugh whenever I see the Italy anthem trending on twitter and you get all these flag shaggers complaining that England players never show that kind of passion singing their anthem.

 

Just a thought, but maybe them having to sing about God and Queen just doesn’t really stir the old passions in the way an Italian or French anthem does? Plus there’s the other issue that being English absolutely fucking sucks as the country is populated by morons who number sufficiently to ensure that it’s governed by cunts. It’s mainly just the song being shit though. You’ve got to have Stuart Pearce levels of Brexitness to be able to get passionate about that.

 

Anyway, the opening game got under way when the ball was driven onto the field on a remote control car. What the fuck? I think I liked it though if I’m being honest.

 

Looking at the team line up on the screen I didn’t even know half the players in the Italy team because I don’t watch Serie A and other than Juve, Italian teams have done fuck all in Europe for years.

 

The first take I had from this game was that Chiellini thinks he’s Joel Matip with all those little forward forays. The second take I had was that Turkey aren’t going to score a goal in this tournament. Not with that big old statue up front. He’s the captain, he’s 35 and he kept getting caught offside all the time even though he wasn’t trying to run in behind. 

 

He was just stood offside every time the ball was played up to him and the one time he tried to run he was outpaced by Chiellini and threw himself to the floor looking for a pen. He looked like a Sunday League player but he’s just won the farmer’s league with Lille so he must have something, I guess.

 

Italy looked good in the first half but struggled to break down Turkey’s blanket 11 man defence. Fuck me they were negative weren’t they? Turkey looked so scared I can only think someone must have told them Christmas was coming. 

 

The opening goal eventually came early in the second half when Berardi fired in a cross and it hit one of the Turkey defenders in the chest and bounced in. Immobile made it 2-0 with a rebound and the lively Insigne added a third. He was subbed immediately afterwards, which wasn’t a surprise as he’d ran his tiny little legs off. They should have sent that remote control car back on to give the little guy a well deserved ride off the field.

 

I was pleasantly surprised by how good Italy were, especially as I knew so little about them beforehand. There are three players in their squad from Sassuolo, whoever the hell they are. I don’t know where Sassuolo is or if indeed it is even a place, or just a name like Lazio, Juventus or Sampdoria. 

 

Not sure if the inclusion of three of their players shows how strong or how weak that league is now. Used to be that their entire squad would be taken from the Milan clubs, Juve, Roma and Lazio and they were all household names. There are no stars in this team. Not one. Yet I’ve rarely seen them play as positively as this. 

 

This was the first time ever they’d scored more than two in a game at the Euros, which is an incredible stat really. They don’t look like Italy any more, either in playing style or visually. The Italian side lost a lot of its magic for me when they stopped having the best hair in these tournaments and the team started to look like extras from Gomorrah. Every one of the fuckers is covered in tattoos and they all have the same haircuts. If UEFA allowed it they’d be wearing bubble coats, smoking ciggies and riding onto the pitch on scooters too. They get a pass on all this though because… well, the anthem.

 

I thought the atmosphere in the stadium was shite. Virtually no singing and the only noise came from Turks who were booing whenever Italy had the ball, which was pretty much all game as Turkey couldn’t put more than two passes together all night. 

 

It remains to be seen whether Turkey are this bad or if Italy were just really fucking good. I suspect a little of both. Italy played with a pace and intensity I don’t think I’ve ever seen from them before. Their pressing was great and even at 2-0 they didn’t sit back and kept looking for more goals. 

 

The only thing that stops me going all in on rooting for Italy to win it is Mancini. I’d forgotten how much I disliked him but seeing him preening on the touchline brought it all back. Pretentious wanker. Based on this though he’s completely transformed how Italy play, so I’ll praise him through gritted teeth.

 

 

This is just a teaser, click here to view the full article

 

Please note that Euro 2020 round ups are only available to website subscribers. Subscriptions cost just £2 a month (you need to register first) and can be purchased here. 

  • Upvote 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • dave u pinned this topic

Reportedly Arnautovic's celebration was directed towards Alioski, so it was probably justified. That Alioski acts like a total cunt anytime I see him play, whether it be for Leeds or North Macedonia, he's always more interested in winding up opponents than actually playing

  • Upvote 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

3 hours ago, Through Ball said:

Reportedly Arnautovic's celebration was directed towards Alioski, so it was probably justified. That Alioski acts like a total cunt anytime I see him play, whether it be for Leeds or North Macedonia, he's always more interested in winding up opponents than actually playing

Yeah he does seem like a right bastard him. Always involved in little spats. Remember the thing with him and Dwight McNeil? Hilariously petty.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

“Tell you what’s proper shit though. Wales having to play in fucking Baku. What’s that all about?"                                      One of the main sponsors of UEFA are an Azerbaijani state owned oil company which I'm sure has nothing to do with why Baku was given a game to host or why they got the UEFA cup final a few years back its just a coincidence.

  • Upvote 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

17 hours ago, dave u said:

Yeah he does seem like a right bastard him. Always involved in little spats. Remember the thing with him and Dwight McNeil? Hilariously petty.

Haha, yeah, I think that was the moment I realized he really is a tool, although the signs were already there

  • Upvote 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • dave u unpinned this topic

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

 Share

×
×
  • Create New...