Premier League Round Up (May 7-12 2021)

[tlw content]

The weekend was going pretty well for us overall until City threw away their game against Chelsea. The one time we actually wanted the pricks to win and they fucked it up.

 

They opened the scoring just before half time through Sterling, who took the ball off the toe of Aguero to convert a cross by Jesus. Aguero actually gets credited with an assist for that, which shows just how pointless that stat is as it was a dreadful touch that would have seen a defender clear the danger if Sterling hadn’t been on the spot. Worst assist since Aquilani fell over at Burnley, the ball hit him on the back and Stevie lashed it in from 30 yards.

 

City were then were awarded a penalty immediately after as Jesus went tumbling following a minor collision with Gilmour, who was not Happy about that. *sniggers*

 

That’s not a pen for me as Jesus stepped across him and Gilmour isn’t even really trying to do anything except avoid him. Not that I cared, I just wanted Chelsea to lose so this was all good. Until Aguero fucked it up.

 

He’s absolutely shite on pens, always has been. I don’t have his record to hand, but it feels like he misses as many as he scores. I don’t know why they don’t have Ederson just leathering all of their pens as he strikes a ball better than anyone they have other than De Bruyne.

 

Anyone who attempts a ‘Panenka’ should be fined a week’s wages. And if they miss, it should be a month’s. Showboating twats. That miss basically cost City the game because if he scores Chelsea aren’t coming back from 2-0.

 

Not that they will care. The title was more or less wrapped up anyway as they knew United had to play three games in five days. I had this one down as a Chelsea loss though so for them to come back and win was a kick in the balls.

 

Ziyech levelled with a low shot that Ederson probably should have saved and Werner and Hudson-Odoi both had goals ruled out for offside as Chelsea pushed hard for a winner.

 

Sterling should have had a penalty late on but then he shouldn’t have even been on the field to win it, so that one evened itself out. It was definitely a red card tackle on Werner in the first half but he’s done that before and got away with it. One of those ‘ho ho ho wee Raheem canna tackle’ kind of things. 

 

As for the pen he didn’t get, I get the school of thought that says he slowed down to ensure the defender ran into him, but he’s entitled to do that as there’s no rule that says you need to run flat out at all times. If there was I’d have never bothered lacing up a pair of boots because fuck that.

 

The point is, he may have slowed down to draw contact, but Zouma’s knee caught him on the thigh and caused him to go down. It wasn’t a dive but you can say he played for it. If we hadn’t been given a pen for that I’d have gone mad. 

 

That was a huge moment in the game because Chelsea went up the other end and won it through Alonso’s scuffed finish. Annoying as fuck, but if Chelsea can repeat that in the Champions League Final then that will soften the blow somewhat.

 

 

This is just a teaser click here to view the full article

 

Please note that PL Round Ups are only available to website subscribers. Subscriptions cost just £2 a month (you need to register first) and can be purchased here. 

[alles ist gut]

Top, top Arsenal stench analysis there, Dave

[grazywalker]

I messaged the lads group straight after that Richarlason move. Not only did he make shit run, he also stood there like a ducking ugly statue with that cunty face. He should have been busting a gut to get to 6 yard box as Coleman was legging it and tried to put balls across. 

The cunt.

[Peter Cormack]

Piss poor Hodge analysis Dave, the only hot place he should be sent to has no beaches or golf courses. On our neighbours and West Ham.....”Moyse outmoysed by boring blues”

[DaveT]

Solskjaer was entirely within his rights to use his squad against Leicester. But he was clearly going out of his way to fuck us over and give Leicester an advantage......... he chose to play his first choice team at Villa on the Sunday, most of the team having played in Rome three days before, rest them all against Leicester and bring them back against us. How did that work out for you Ole? Fuck Solskjaer, fuck United and fuck their moronic fans.

[aws]

Managers without an agenda would have rotated half the team for each of the three games.  He may well have got two wins if he had.  

[KMD7]

32 minutes ago, aws said:

Managers without an agenda would have rotated half the team for each of the three games.  He may well have got two wins if he had.  

He's a small time snidey goblin faced cunt. 

[Razoray]

Can't agree with the Kane analysis Dave. He can't run anymore. All he does is stand outside the box, and if the ball comes to his feet he can find a pass and when he gets it in the box he can score.

I know creating and scoring goals are "the most difficult things in football" but he is like playing with 10 men otherwise. 

It shouldn't be like this. He is only 28 this summer but his fitness has dropped like a stone in the past 3 years and will only get worse. 

If Bobby and Mané had their shooting boots on this season Salah would have at least 4 or 5 more assists and would be close to Kane's numbers but would have contributed a lot more to his team. 

I can't see Guardiola or Tuchel buying Kane and his lack of energy, on and off the ball, so the only place he can go in England is to Man United and is he going to give them much more than Cavani does? 

I think he will stay at Spurs but the goal hanging lark will only get worse - no wonder you're a fan. 

[Razoray]

Bang on re Fat Sam. 

The players this, before I was appointed that. It's bullshit. They have improved slightly since he was appointed but they have 19 points from 22 games. That's 30 points from 35 games 

They would still be 7 points off Brighton with 3 games to play. 

Hope we never see his chops again 

[DaveTucker]

You're right about the over the top praise for Dias. I'm not denying he has made a difference and is a quality player but they've only conceded 6 less than last year and there's still 2 games left. They are also only 2 points better off which could be 8 if they win the last 2. When you consider the lack of pressure they've played under this year it's hardly a remarkable turnaround.