Jump to content
  • Sign up for free and receive a month's subscription

    You are viewing this page as a guest. That means you are either a member who has not logged in, or you have not yet registered with us. Signing up for an account only takes a minute and it means you will no longer see this annoying box! It will also allow you to get involved with our friendly(ish!) community and take part in the discussions on our forums. And because we're feeling generous, if you sign up for a free account we will give you a month's free trial access to our subscriber only content with no obligation to commit. Register an account and then send a private message to @dave u and he'll hook you up with a subscription.

Premier League Round Up (Jul 26 2020)


tlw content
 Share

Recommended Posts

The longest season in history is finally over, and for the first time I'm able to write one of these final day recaps without having to mention another club being Champions. Feels good.

 

It wasn't the most dramatic of final days was it? Leicester, Watford and Bournemouth were the biggest losers, with Villa, Chelsea and United the ones left celebrating (much to the annoyance of Roy Keane, I'll get to that later).

 

Watford are so shit that they couldn’t even get a result against an Arsenal side with both eyes on next week’s FA Cup Final. Arsenal had nothing to play for, Watford had everything to play for. And Arsenal still won. Watford would have probably gone down even if they’d kept Nigel Pearson but getting rid of him ended any slim hope they had.

 

The Gunners went ahead after just five minutes with a VAR awarded penalty after Dawson clumsily barged into the back of Lacazette. Notorious Arsenal hater Mike Dean didn’t give it initially but VAR corrected that mistake and Dean’s face was a picture as he got the message through his ear piece. You could see him thinking “Ok, if that’s how you want it, but I still say I was right”.

 

Aubamayeng converted from the spot to edge closer to Vardy in the race for the Golden Boot. He then teed up Tierney for the second, which came immediately after Watford had wasted a glorious chance to equalise. Soon it was 3-0 as Aubamayeng produced a brilliant overhead kick to get himself within one of Vardy. That’s as close as he would get as Watford dominated the rest of the game and Arsenal almost went the full Arsenal.

 

Dean confirmed his true colours by awarding a penalty AGAINST Arsenal when Luiz caught Welbeck. The striker got his shot away, it was saved, and Luiz arrived a fraction late and kicked him. There is no way on earth though that Dean gives that at the other end.

 

I read somewhere that Luiz set a Premier League record for penalties conceded with that. At least this time he didn’t also pick up a red card. Money well spent that new contract. I'm glad he's staying as he's one of the most entertaining players in the league. He's like the golfer who goes birdie, eagle, quadruple bogey right the way through his round. He's the one you want to follow around as you never know what he's going to do next. That's David Luiz that.

 

Deeney tucked the penalty away and he didn’t go down the middle this time. Must have read what I said last week. That sparked a Watford flourish and Welbeck’s close range strike made it 3-2. They peppered the Arsenal goal after that but couldn’t force an equaliser.

 

So off you fuck, Watford. Hopefully the newly promoted teams will fare better against Man City than you did. Let’s face it, they can hardly do worse.

 

I’ll miss my boy Troy though, unless he gets picked up by another top flight club of course. He was asked by an interviewer after the game if he was planning on retiring and replied: “I’m not that old. You cheeky bastard. Sorry, shouldn’t swear. Sorry!”. Like I say, I’ll miss him, he’s good entertainment.

 

Is there anything worth scavenging from the Watford carcass? Sarr seems to be a player who a lot of Reds would take. I liked him before he even joined Watford as I remember him excelling as an attacking right back in the World Cup or Senegal. I wouldn’t want us to sign him though. Maybe in a couple of years he might reach the required standard but right now he’s nowhere near. Doesn’t score enough goals, misses too many chances and still has a lot of developing to do.

 

Doucoure will be in demand and Deulefeu would be getting a lot of attention too if he hadn’t picked up that bad injury against us. Neither would be of interest to us but both are good Premier League players. On his day, Deulefeu is brilliant. That ‘day’ used to be two or three times a season but over the past year or so he’s improved his consistency. Danny Welcrap is finally about to find his level though, at long last.

 

There is one player from Watford I’d probably take though depending on the circumstances and cost. Ben Foster. Now hear me out. He’s not someone I’d be looking at if we didn’t already have Alisson. He’s not number one at a top club material but name me a better number two in this league. I don’t think there is one.

 

Foster has easily been a top ten keeper in the Premier League these last few seasons. He’s got the occasional howler in him but every week on MOTD he seems to be making miracle saves. I don’t know what’s happening with Adrian and whether we’ll be in the market for a new number two, but if we are I’d defo be kicking the tyres on Foster (I'd consider Joe Hart too, although I'm pretty sure I'm in a minority on that). He’s English too which helps on the home grown quota, although I think we’re fine on that anyway.

 

So Watford can fuck off, they have no complaints, but I can see why Bournemouth will be looking angrily at that failed hawkeye incident that gave Villa a point against Sheffield United. They’re talking about legal action but it won’t get them anywhere. Not unless they can borrow Man City’s lawyers.

 

This is just a teaser, click here to view the full article

 

Please note that PL Round Ups are only available to website subscribers. Subscriptions cost just £2 a month (you need to register first) and can be purchased here. 

  • Upvote 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • dave u pinned this topic

I would have loved for us to be in the upcoming CL tournament in Portugal trying to retain it but since we are out - do you think it will be better for us for preparing with the new season? Would it have been better for the players to have more competitive games in the CL or would the 6 weeks off with a bit of rest be better for them?

 

  • Upvote 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

18 minutes ago, Moin Kapadia said:

I would have loved for us to be in the upcoming CL tournament in Portugal trying to retain it but since we are out - do you think it will be better for us for preparing with the new season? Would it have been better for the players to have more competitive games in the CL or would the 6 weeks off with a bit of rest be better for them?

 

Erm, hang on a minute. Are you really asking Dave to answer your question? Have you read nothing of these reports?

 

Look, it goes like this. He asks his mother what she thinks. He then makes a pronouncement which will either:

1. Turn out true in which case he'll say "called that one last week." 

2. Turn out false in which case he'll say "it turned out like that because of what I wrote last week". 

Then he'll add in some dumb Italian/Americanisms (usually "jabroni", or "cojones", or "gotten"). He'll then go off on one about Mike Riley or Fraudiola or Fat Fwank before a final flourish involving a few "my boy"s and a dig at either one or both of Everton or the red Mancs. 

 

Please don't be asking him serious questions. It's neither the time nor the place. 

 

  • Like 2
  • Upvote 6
Link to comment
Share on other sites

27 minutes ago, rb14 said:

Erm, hang on a minute. Are you really asking Dave to answer your question? Have you read nothing of these reports?

 

Look, it goes like this. He asks his mother what she thinks. He then makes a pronouncement which will either:

1. Turn out true in which case he'll say "called that one last week." 

2. Turn out false in which case he'll say "it turned out like that because of what I wrote last week". 

Then he'll add in some dumb Italian/Americanisms (usually "jabroni", or "cojones", or "gotten"). He'll then go off on one about Mike Riley or Fraudiola or Fat Fwank before a final flourish involving a few "my boy"s and a dig at either one or both of Everton or the red Mancs. 

 

Please don't be asking him serious questions. It's neither the time nor the place. 

 

Yeah that template seems pretty accurate -  also need to include the obligatory laugh at David Moyes every time he loses a game which usually happens every other week. 

  • Upvote 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

On 30/07/2020 at 12:38, tlw content said:

The longest season in history is finally over, and for the first time I'm able to write one of these final day recaps without having to mention another club being Champions. Feels good.

I've been 'good' since the final whistle of the Chelsea-Man City game. Every morning I wake up and my first thought is to marvel that it has finally happened, and the feeling persists throughout the day. 

  • Upvote 3
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Hart made the 'my boy XI' because I needed a keeper and none came to mind. I'm rooting for him to get his form back as I feel bad for how his career just went down the shitter almost overnight.

 

I think he might be over that run of brutal form he was in for a few years because he was playing well for Burnley while Pope was injured. They just kept losing all the time but it wasn't down to him. Then their form picked up when Pope came back in. Maybe that's not a co-incidence but maybe it was.

 

Either way, I want him to have a resurgence as what happened to him was completely inexplicable.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

33 minutes ago, dave u said:

Hart made the 'my boy XI' because I needed a keeper and none came to mind. I'm rooting for him to get his form back as I feel bad for how his career just went down the shitter almost overnight.

 

I think he might be over that run of brutal form he was in for a few years because he was playing well for Burnley while Pope was injured. They just kept losing all the time but it wasn't down to him. Then their form picked up when Pope came back in. Maybe that's not a co-incidence but maybe it was.

 

Either way, I want him to have a resurgence as what happened to him was completely inexplicable.

Yeah he's a strange one alright. Was a very decent goalie for a few seasons then his form dropped off a cliff. 

  • Upvote 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

2 hours ago, KMD7 said:

Yeah he's a strange one alright. Was a very decent goalie for a few seasons then his form dropped off a cliff. 

I sense something a presence I have not felt since.......... watching the Mancs - DeGea

  • Upvote 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • dave u unpinned this topic

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

 Share

×
×
  • Create New...