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Premier League Round Up (Jul 14-17 2020)

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Chelsea kicked things off for this round of fixtures with an unconvincing 1-0 win over already relegated Norwich. They never looked in danger of conceding but it hardly inspires any confidence they'll hold United off for a Champions League place. 

 

Giroud headed the only goal of the game. I said last week he’s never really been given the credit he deserves and he’s very under-rated. Gary Lineker then tweeted it. So if you’re reading this, Gary, feel free to use my “Portuguese Gylfi” line next time you’re talking about that Fernandez twat. 

 

Chelsea though. Fucking pricks, they’ve put us in a situation whereby beating them will almost certainly put United in the Champions League next season. I’m genuinely resentful over this. Chelsea should have wrapped this up weeks ago and we could have avoided this unpleasantness. I want us to beat them but it’s going to annoy me if we do because of the consequences.

 

I wonder what will happen to Norwich over the next few weeks as they have some decent young players they might not be able to keep hold of. Aarons, Lewis and Cantwell might all be in demand this summer.

 

Tim Krul is too good for the Championship as well. I’d actually take him over Adrian if he was available on the cheap. Krul is an ideal number two for a top club, assuming he's willing to accept that role. Maybe he just wants to play? He’s a bit of a knobhead like, but then so was Adrian.

 

Speaking of knobheads, Man City beat Bournemouth 2-1 in a surprisingly competitive game. Having gone 2-0 up I’m sure we all expected them to go on and get five again, but Bournemouth gave it a right good go. 

 

David Silva put City in front with a quality free-kick. Keeper shouldn’t be getting beat like that though. Wasn’t even in the corner.

 

Stanislas went within a whisker of an equaliser with a free-kick of his own that was tipped onto the post by Ederson. It bounced back off the post, hit his stupid fucking head and hit the post again before bouncing clear.

 

That free-kick incidentally came about when Solanke dribbled past Otamendi and was brought down. You know how they keep stats on who has dribbled past Van Dijk and it’s seen as a badge of honour? They need to do the reverse on Otamendi. Anyone who hasn’t dribbled past that shit cunt needs to be named and shamed.

 

 

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Please note that PL Round Ups are only available to website subscribers. Subscriptions cost just £2 a month (you need to register first) and can be purchased here. 

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'They need to do the reverse on Otamendi. Anyone who hasn’t dribbled past that shit cunt needs to be named and shamed'. Luv it, add Kyle Walker to that.

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That Ramsdale goalie for Bournbemouth looked quite good a while ago, pulling off some decent saves. Just like Henderson. The more I see of both of them, the less impressed I am.

 

The two disallowed goals against - you guessed it - the two Manc teams just underline how useless the refereeing community is. If it's that close a call that you can't measure it and spend minutes on end jiggling about with the graphics, surely you just call it leve with the defender? Far too common sensible for those idiots. 

 

Also during the City game, there was a shout for a handball/penalty against Silva, when he stopped a cross (throw-in?) hitting his face with his hand. Penalty all day long for me. Commentator says - 'that's allowed, he's protecting his face'. Completely different to the Doherty situation, with the flying boot. I'd have been embarrassed to come up with that excuse when I was playing for my junior school team!

 

 

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Surprised when you mention Chelsea fucking it up that you’re not accounting for a Roggo masterclass on the last day of the season. I mean, how could you possibly doubt Roggo...

 

Also disappointed to see Deeney retains ‘my boy’ status after all the shit he’s come out with over the last few months.

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Top, top, reverse jinxing analysis on the FA Cup semifinal.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Yeah, ok, that's not what I was doing, I fully expected Arsenal to get twatted.

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17 hours ago, Anubis said:

Surprised when you mention Chelsea fucking it up that you’re not accounting for a Roggo masterclass on the last day of the season. I mean, how could you possibly doubt Roggo...

 

Also disappointed to see Deeney retains ‘my boy’ status after all the shit he’s come out with over the last few months.

 

I contemplated such a severe punishment, but decided to put him on probation. Not for the first time in his life.

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