Summer Shorts

[diamondjoe]

It's hard to get a decent pair of shorts to look passable on a middle aged fucker like me, especially as I've short legs. What's an acceptable amount to spend on a good pair. And what length should we be looking at?

Was looking at https://www.mrmarvis.co.uk/ but fuck me, £80 for shorts?? 

[Rick Sanchez C-137]

I wear any old shorts as long as they're comfy. £80 for shorts is fucking mental. At least to me. Maybe I'm just poor/stingey.

[Captain Turdseye]

It’s pissing down, Joe. 

[VladimirIlyich]

15 quid shorts from Asda.

[mattyq]

If i paid £80 for shorts I'd expect them to be made of gold or diamonds

M&S do perfectly good ones for £15

[Lee909]

Not sure there's enough pockets for some on here. These might be better

 

 

 

 

[Stouffer]

Shants Ants Thants.

[VladimirIlyich]

Sharts.

[easytoslip]

Sharnt. 

[Tony Moanero]

48 minutes ago, Lee909 said:

Not sure there's enough pockets for some on here. These might be better

 

 

 

 

Fuck’s sake, Lee, they’re shite. The sort of thing Mike from Spaced would wear. 

[Lee909]

25 minutes ago, Tony Moanero said:

Fuck’s sake, Lee, they’re shite. The sort of thing Mike from Spaced would wear. 

I know they are

 

Turdseye loves a pair of cargo shorts doesn't he

 

 

[Bjornebye]

32 minutes ago, Lee909 said:

I know they are

 

Turdseye loves a pair of cargo shorts doesn't he

 

 

When it comes to pockets "the more the merrier" with that cunt. He never gets a round in at the match. Not because he is a tight cunt from Runcorn but because he has forgotten which pocket his money is in. He's got more chance rescuing a baby off David Bowie with Hoggle in tow. 

 

 

[VladimirIlyich]

5 minutes ago, Bjornebye said:

When it comes to pockets "the more the merrier" with that cunt. He never gets a round in at the match. Not because he is a tight cunt from Runcorn but because he has forgotten which pocket his money is in. He's got more chance rescuing a baby off David Bowie with Hoggle in tow. 

 

 

I bet you he wears boxing gloves at the bar when it's his round too.

[Trumo]

3 hours ago, diamondjoe said:

It's hard to get a decent pair of shorts to look passable on a middle aged fucker like me, especially as I've short legs. What's an acceptable amount to spend on a good pair. And what length should we be looking at?

Was looking at https://www.mrmarvis.co.uk/ but fuck me, £80 for shorts?? 

 

This is the key bit I think. Just wear a set of boxers, no-one will know. They'll look like regular knee-length shorts to the rest of us. If your legs are so short that you could audition to be an oompah loompah, then they'll look like 3/4 shorts to the rest of us. Either way, don't go wasting 80 notes on a pair of shorts from that site. That sort of folly is reserved for tits who buy "clothing essentials" like the ones listed in the back of FHM.

[Bjornebye]

Diamond Joe after a few lockdown beers

 

 

 

[Captain Turdseye]

1 hour ago, Lee909 said:

I know they are

 

Turdseye loves a pair of cargo shorts doesn't he

 

 

Of course. Not in that green colour though, they look rank. My favourites were some French Connection ones that I ordered when I was pissed and paid £70 for. They were smart as fuck, in your classic Steve Irwin colour, but they were only good for one summer because the way the material was, every time they went in the wash they got harder and harder to iron so I gave up in the end and they became expensive house shorts. If you keep your eyes open there’s decent ones to be found sometimes in Sainsbury’s/Tesco. 
 

I bought and wore a couple of pairs of cotton Adidas shorts last summer for the first time in about 10 years and it was a refreshing change. Nice and comfy with plenty of breathing room for your cock and balls. Need to order some more or suggest to the kids that I want some for my birthday. 
 

Denim shorts and chino shorts are holiday/beach gear to be worn with flip flops. 

[Bjornebye]

2 minutes ago, Captain Turdseye said:

Of course. Not in that green colour though, they look rank. My favourites were some French Connection ones that I ordered when I was pissed and paid £70 for. They were smart as fuck, in your classic Steve Irwin colour, but they were only good for one summer because the Vietnam War ended. 

. 

[Captain Turdseye]

1 hour ago, VladimirIlyich said:

I bet you he wears boxing gloves at the bar when it's his round too.

You can call me a gormless, multi-pocketed mong and that’s fine but I’m not tight when it’s time to get a round in. That’s out of order. 

[Stickman]

I’ve been wearing these for the past week, chaff a bit but great value for £15 from Primark 

 

 

 

 

[Captain Turdseye]

Just now, Bjornebye said:

. 

Ha. 

[Bjornebye]

2 minutes ago, Captain Turdseye said:

You can call me a gormless, multi-pocketed mong and that’s fine but I’m not tight when it’s time to get a round in. That’s out of order. 

Last pub I was in with you, you were sat on a stool at the bar fast asleep. 

[Captain Turdseye]

1 minute ago, Bjornebye said:

Last pub I was in with you, you were sat on a stool at the bar fast asleep. 

If I was awake I’d have bought you a beer. 

[Bjornebye]

2 minutes ago, Captain Turdseye said:

If I was awake I’d have bought you a beer. 

We were all on the shorts by then.. 

[diamondjoe]

3 hours ago, Lee909 said:

Not sure there's enough pockets for some on here. These might be better

 

 

 

 

These are a bit Mikey Carroll lottery lout.

 

[diamondjoe]

19 minutes ago, Captain Turdseye said:

Of course. Not in that green colour though, they look rank. My favourites were some French Connection ones that I ordered when I was pissed and paid £70 for. They were smart as fuck, in your classic Steve Irwin colour, but they were only good for one summer because the way the material was, every time they went in the wash they got harder and harder to iron so I gave up in the end and they became expensive house shorts. If you keep your eyes open there’s decent ones to be found sometimes in Sainsbury’s/Tesco. 
 

I bought and wore a couple of pairs of cotton Adidas shorts last summer for the first time in about 10 years and it was a refreshing change. Nice and comfy with plenty of breathing room for your cock and balls. Need to order some more or suggest to the kids that I want some for my birthday. 
 

Denim shorts and chino shorts are holiday/beach gear to be worn with flip flops. 

This the key. All I have is denim and Chino shorts and some cotton ones might reduce the sweaty bollocks coefficient.