Coronavirus

[Nelly-Szoboszlai]

[Carvalho Diablo]

I've got Bruce's bottles of booze burning a hole in these Co-op bags but the nursing staff have forbidden me to lash it into me due to the obscene amount of tablets they've got me on.

 

Torture tactics.

[chrisbonnie]

18 hours ago, littletedwest said:

Just tested positive. The Mrs is high risk so I agreed to take a test due to a bit of a cough just being overcautious. I have no temperature, sense or taste and smell is fine.

It was a lateral flow test, now I've read these are unreliable. I genuinely feel its a bad chest but I'll be responsible obviously and stay home. 

Out of curiosity is it not being battered into you guys in the UK about getting tested and isolating at the faintest whiff of a cough? 

 

Here in Ireland it's absolutely non stop, between adds on the radio and TV to billboards. You're being advised to stay at home if you have a runny nose and get a test, only leave your house when you test negative. 

 

Our little lad (5) had a cough last Monday, for no more than an hour and we all had to stay at home until he was given a negative test. I missed 4 days work because of it. Pain in the ring, but that's the advice we're being given. 

 

I'm just curious to the messaging you chaps in the uk are getting compared to us here in Ireland

 

[Pete]

5 minutes ago, chrisbonnie said:

Out of curiosity is it not being battered into you guys in the UK about getting tested and isolating at the faintest whiff of a cough? 

 

Here in Ireland it's absolutely non stop, between adds on the radio and TV to billboards. You're being advised to stay at home if you have a runny nose and get a test, only leave your house when you test negative. 

 

Our little lad (5) had a cough last Monday, for no more than an hour and we all had to stay at home until he was given a negative test. I missed 4 days work because of it. Pain in the ring, but that's the advice we're being given. 

 

I'm just curious to the messaging you chaps in the uk are getting compared to us here in Ireland

 

You appear to be mistaken in thinking our 'government' knows what it's doing. 

[Carvalho Diablo]

Well, taking a 3rd step test with the physio today; I need my O2 saturation level to hit an 93% threshold following a short period of exercise if I'm to be allowed to go home. Yesterday hit 88%, Monday was 86%.

 

I have a plan though.

 

I intend to get a hot steamy shower half an hour before the test is due to commence, hopefully that'll help clear my lungs as best as possible. I'll also whack half a packet of Polos into me for similar reasons.

 

Failing that I'm just gonna level with the physio and tell her straight, it's the Reds v Spurs at 8pm and I'm getting a new sofa delivered today in time for the match. So recalibrate your flipping O2 machine just by a couple of points, give me a fighting chance to GTFO of this dementing fucking gulag.

 

3rd time lucky, wish me luck guys...

[Rick Sanchez C-137]

9 minutes ago, Carvalho Diablo said:

Well, taking a 3rd step test with the physio today; I need my O2 saturation level to hit an 93% threshold following a short period of exercise if I'm to be allowed to go home. Yesterday hit 88%, Monday was 86%.

 

I have a plan though.

 

I intend to get a hot steamy shower half an hour before the test is due to commence, hopefully that'll help clear my lungs as best as possible. I'll also whack half a packet of Polos into me for similar reasons.

 

Failing that I'm just gonna level with the physio and tell her straight, it's the Reds v Spurs at 8pm and I'm getting a new sofa delivered today in time for the match. So recalibrate your flipping O2 machine just by a couple of points, give me a fighting chance to GTFO of this dementing fucking gulag.

 

3rd time lucky, wish me luck guys...

 

All the best CD!

[John102]

12 minutes ago, Carvalho Diablo said:

Well, taking a 3rd step test with the physio today; I need my O2 saturation level to hit an 93% threshold following a short period of exercise if I'm to be allowed to go home. Yesterday hit 88%, Monday was 86%.

 

I have a plan though.

 

I intend to get a hot steamy shower half an hour before the test is due to commence, hopefully that'll help clear my lungs as best as possible. I'll also whack half a packet of Polos into me for similar reasons.

 

Failing that I'm just gonna level with the physio and tell her straight, it's the Reds v Spurs at 8pm and I'm getting a new sofa delivered today in time for the match. So recalibrate your flipping O2 machine just by a couple of points, give me a fighting chance to GTFO of this dementing fucking gulag.

 

3rd time lucky, wish me luck guys...

I don't think luck is required. I'd maybe go Trebor mints instead of Polo's, however, seems a pretty flawless plan otherwise. 

[Carvalho Diablo]

1 minute ago, John102 said:

I don't think luck is required. I'd maybe go Trebor mints instead of Polo's, however, seems a pretty flawless plan otherwise. 

Subterfuge and cunning, I'm onboard with that skipper.

[Rick Sanchez C-137]

50 minutes ago, Carvalho Diablo said:

Well, taking a 3rd step test with the physio today; I need my O2 saturation level to hit an 93% threshold following a short period of exercise if I'm to be allowed to go home. Yesterday hit 88%, Monday was 86%.

 

I have a plan though.

 

I intend to get a hot steamy shower half an hour before the test is due to commence, hopefully that'll help clear my lungs as best as possible. I'll also whack half a packet of Polos into me for similar reasons.

 

Failing that I'm just gonna level with the physio and tell her straight, it's the Reds v Spurs at 8pm and I'm getting a new sofa delivered today in time for the match. So recalibrate your flipping O2 machine just by a couple of points, give me a fighting chance to GTFO of this dementing fucking gulag.

 

3rd time lucky, wish me luck guys...

 

If she won't the you leave just find her email address and leave it to the internet terrorists.

 

FREE TLW ONE!

 

Not sure how signing her up to 3 gay porn sites will help but it's worth a try.

[johnsusername]

[Bruce Spanner]

Grim...

 

 

 

That's what a decade of Tory government gets you.

[littletedwest]

2 hours ago, chrisbonnie said:

Out of curiosity is it not being battered into you guys in the UK about getting tested and isolating at the faintest whiff of a cough? 

 

Here in Ireland it's absolutely non stop, between adds on the radio and TV to billboards. You're being advised to stay at home if you have a runny nose and get a test, only leave your house when you test negative. 

 

Our little lad (5) had a cough last Monday, for no more than an hour and we all had to stay at home until he was given a negative test. I missed 4 days work because of it. Pain in the ring, but that's the advice we're being given. 

 

I'm just curious to the messaging you chaps in the uk are getting compared to us here in Ireland

 

To be honest I feel ( and others may disagree) that it's a cough in conjunction with temperature or loss of taste/smell. It's interesting to speak to other people as I found out my cousin had it with just a cough and so did my mate just from speaking to them yesterday.

 

This feels no worse ( at the moment) than a normal seasonal thing. And those are pretty frequent at this time of year.

 

I defo feel a bit lethargic. On the bright side I'm alone in my leper colony with her dropping food off and without any moaning 

[M_B]

1 hour ago, johnsusername said:

Not sure I get that one. Can the government force a private school to remain open?

[Bruce Spanner]

So here’s the Gov’s big ideas guidance...

 

Schools need up to nine members of staff to complete the tests and subsequent admin, these can be existing, over stretched staff, or they can employ them from imaginary budgets.

 

All for test that a demonstrably ineffective and other governments have dismissed out of had as pointless. 

 

‘World beating’

 

[Bjornebye]

I haven't been watching the news much lately its too grim but has Chris Whitty been about? Not seen him for a while. He might still be doing his stuff but I always got the feeling that he didn't agree with the government line. 

[Section_31]

The lack of apparent Covid chaos in China is mad. I'm not into conspiracy theories but fucking hell, the population density there and the relatively poor health system, cases should be like India. A couple I know live there and not a day goes by without them posting pics of themselves at a Christmas market in Shanghai or some shit (which in itself rouses suspicions, seeing as the Chinese block on social media use means they've usually only been able to post about once or twice a year, but maybe they don't mind this stuff getting out at the moment?). 

 

[johnsusername]

29 minutes ago, M_B said:

Not sure I get that one. Can the government force a private school to remain open?

I think it's more that headteachers are telling the government that things are grim in their schools and can there be some leeway (either teaching online or closing a few days early for Christmas), and the government threatening them with legal action.

[Paulie Dangerously]

Smelled something for the first time since Friday today. My coffee. Got emotional. 

[Rick Sanchez C-137]

9 minutes ago, Paulie Dangerously said:

Smelled something for the first time since Friday today. My coffee. Got emotional. 

 

Better than discovering you senses are back with a bad fart

[Carvalho Diablo]

3 hours ago, Carvalho Diablo said:

Well, taking a 3rd step test with the physio today; I need my O2 saturation level to hit an 93% threshold following a short period of exercise if I'm to be allowed to go home. Yesterday hit 88%, Monday was 86%.

 

I have a plan though.

 

I intend to get a hot steamy shower half an hour before the test is due to commence, hopefully that'll help clear my lungs as best as possible. I'll also whack half a packet of Polos into me for similar reasons.

 

Failing that I'm just gonna level with the physio and tell her straight, it's the Reds v Spurs at 8pm and I'm getting a new sofa delivered today in time for the match. So recalibrate your flipping O2 machine just by a couple of points, give me a fighting chance to GTFO of this dementing fucking gulag.

 

3rd time lucky, wish me luck guys...

So then, I failed again to hit this fucking 93% threshold score, scoring 91% today.

 

However, the physio Nicole (who is drop dead gorgeous, even underneath all of her PPE clobber) told me that the step test is supposed to be for only 40 steps, and I'd walked for well over 100 steps.

 

She's recommending that I go home but that needs to be rubber stamped by the doctors who are now saying that the 93% threshold is a lower one and that they'd like to see me hit another 97 / 98% threshold instead. The cunts are moving the goalposts!

 

Anyway, Nicole is still vouching for me and the docs have agreed to another step test, which Nicole will rigourously cap at the 40 max. That test will take place at 1:30 and it's a huge deal for me now.

[cloggypop]

14 minutes ago, Paulie Dangerously said:

Smelled something for the first time since Friday today. My coffee. Got emotional. 

Marcel Proust over here. 

[Scott_M]

137k had their first vaccination last week.

 

Given the logistical challenges, it sound like a good start. 
 

Only another 19.863m to go. Twice. 

[Bjornebye]

33 minutes ago, Carvalho Diablo said:

So then, I failed again to hit this fucking 93% threshold score, scoring 91% today.

 

However, the physio Nicole (who is drop dead gorgeous, even underneath all of her PPE clobber) told me that the step test is supposed to be for only 40 steps, and I'd walked for well over 100 steps.

 

She's recommending that I go home but that needs to be rubber stamped by the doctors who are now saying that the 93% threshold is a lower one and that they'd like to see me hit another 97 / 98% threshold instead. The cunts are moving the goalposts!

 

Anyway, Nicole is still vouching for me and the docs have agreed to another step test, which Nicole will rigourously cap at the 40 max. That test will take place at 1:30 and it's a huge deal for me now.

Pics of Nicole 

[TheHowieLama]

@chrisbonnie

Almost sure that a runny nose has nothing to do with Covid and that was one of the signs that you did not have it.

Think it is probably in one of the articles in this thread.

 

 

[Bjornebye]

1 minute ago, TheHowieLama said:

@chrisbonnie

Almost sure that a runny nose has nothing to do with Covid and that was one of the signs that you did not have it.

Think it is probably in one of the articles in this thread.

 

 

Yeah and if you've got symptoms you can mingle as much as you want, snog the face off strangers, bin your mask etc because apparently asymptomatic people we've now learned barely transmit the virus. Enjoy your freedom for a few days until you get your result.