Coronavirus

[TheHowieLama]

Australia back to lockdown - 300 thousand people.

 

The good news is they had a farewell party to the virus in Prague

[lifetime fan]

1 minute ago, Captain Turdseye said:

I’ve just ordered a test. I’ve been feeling like absolute shit since Monday afternoon. 99% sure it’s just one of the bouts of fatigue I get from time to time but seeing as they’ve expanded the list of potential Covid symptoms to include absolutely fucking anything then I thought fuck it. It’s something to look forward to at least. 

Hope to fuck it isn’t mate. 

[TheHowieLama]

2 minutes ago, Captain Turdseye said:

I’ve just ordered a test. I’ve been feeling like absolute shit since Monday afternoon. 99% sure it’s just one of the bouts of fatigue I get from time to time but seeing as they’ve expanded the list of potential Covid symptoms to include absolutely fucking anything then I thought fuck it. It’s something to look forward to at least. 

Been swabbed twice - not bad but not sure I could do it to myself.

Anti body test would be nice.

[Captain Turdseye]

4 minutes ago, lifetime fan said:

Hope to fuck it isn’t mate. 

It would get me out of this home schooling for a few days. 
 

Although I am learning a lot of stuff. 

[cloggypop]

54 minutes ago, Captain Turdseye said:

I’ve just ordered a test. I’ve been feeling like absolute shit since Monday afternoon. 99% sure it’s just one of the bouts of fatigue I get from time to time but seeing as they’ve expanded the list of potential Covid symptoms to include absolutely fucking anything then I thought fuck it. It’s something to look forward to at least. 

Flakka comedown. 

[sir roger]

53 minutes ago, TheHowieLama said:

Been swabbed twice - not bad but not sure I could do it to myself.

Anti body test would be nice.

Got picked for a random test by ICL and came up negative. Didnt enjoy the process  basically sticking a large cotton bud right at the back of the throat for 5 x 10 secs and then up each nostril until it met resistance, and was pretty much gagging. 

[Mudface]

2 minutes ago, sir roger said:

Got picked for a random test by ICL and came up negative. Didnt enjoy the process  basically sticking a large cotton bud right at the back of the throat for 5 x 10 secs and then up each nostril until it met resistance, and was pretty much gagging. 

Ugh, is that 5 to 10 secs, or 5 lots of 10 seconds each? A friend of my wife's vomited when they did her test, I was going to make a remark about practicing deep throat but thought it best not to. 

[3 Stacks]

I had a test a couple days ago when I had a sore throat. Unless you have a debilitating gag reflex it's not that bad. The nose one is unpleasant but it's over in a couple seconds. 

[Bjornebye]

42 minutes ago, Mudface said:

Ugh, is that 5 to 10 secs, or 5 lots of 10 seconds each? A friend of my wife's vomited when they did her test, I was going to make a remark about practicing deep throat but thought it best not to. 

I can't even brush my tongue without retching. They would have to put me to sleep unless they wanted to be covered in a half arsed attempt at a keto diet. 

[Guest]

2 hours ago, TheHowieLama said:

Been swabbed twice - not bad but not sure I could do it to myself.

Anti body test would be nice.

I did the self test last week, the swab in the tonsils is a fucking git of a thing. But it only needs to be brief. The one up the nostril is OK, just like a socially permitted nose pick. 

 

My result was negative, which makes it sound really bad. 

[Guest]

1 hour ago, Mudface said:

Ugh, is that 5 to 10 secs, or 5 lots of 10 seconds each? A friend of my wife's vomited when they did her test, I was going to make a remark about practicing deep throat but thought it best not to. 

I did each tonsil for 5 seconds and then one nostril for 10-15 seconds. 

[Lario]

Well I got my tonsils out when I was a kid, so I obviously can't be tested!

 

*phew*

[Guest]

22 minutes ago, Lario said:

Well I got my tonsils out when I was a kid, so I obviously can't be tested!

 

*phew*

Yes you can, you put the swab where the tonsils used to be. In @Mook's case, that's up the arse. 

[TheHowieLama]

@cloggypop

Can you give us an idea of the sex shop traffic today for their re-opening? Heard the books are full.

[cloggypop]

5 minutes ago, TheHowieLama said:

@cloggypop

Can you give us an idea of the sex shop traffic today for their re-opening? Heard the books are full.

I don't think that shops had to shut. Brothels can open up again today though. 

[Stickman]

12 minutes ago, cloggypop said:

I don't think that shops had to shut. Brothels can open up again today though. 

So it’s ok for legs to open but not schools ?

[cloggypop]

9 minutes ago, Stickman said:

So it’s ok for legs to open but not schools ?

Schools have been back a while now. Pubs been open a month. 

[Elite]

3 hours ago, Captain Turdseye said:

I’ve just ordered a test. I’ve been feeling like absolute shit since Monday afternoon. 99% sure it’s just one of the bouts of fatigue I get from time to time but seeing as they’ve expanded the list of potential Covid symptoms to include absolutely fucking anything then I thought fuck it. It’s something to look forward to at least. 

If you've got it it's only fair that I become your forum spokesperson.

[Trumo]

40 minutes ago, Stickman said:

So it’s ok for legs to open but not schools ?

 

They have to be REALLY careful about how they get that message out. Nonces might be listening.

[JohnnyH]

4 hours ago, Spy Bee said:

Rumours around Wrexham that this Rowan Foods outbreak has led to an explosion in cases and we're heading for a local lockdown, akin to that of Leicester. I don't know how true it is, but that's the word around the campfire.

Any more on this?  My wifes mum lives in Wrexham. Very old and very doddery with no family close by.  

[YorkshireRed]

Borrowed this from the Guardian.

[Section_31]

24 minutes ago, JohnnyH said:

Any more on this?  My wifes mum lives in Wrexham. Very old and very doddery with no family close by.  

Send Adam around. Be class trying to explain that. 

 

 

 

[Colonel Bumcunt]

Chatting with out chief exec today and there is rumour of Devon also having a sort of lockdown, but they're basing it on figures they think are 3 weeks old. 

 

[BeefStroganoff]

3 hours ago, YorkshireRed said:

Borrowed this from the Guardian.

Load of old bollocks this. Its just posturing to appease. They want the country open but want to look like they are being responsible. It isn't enforceable in anyway, shape or form.

[Sugar Ape]

6 hours ago, JohnnyH said:

Any more on this?  My wifes mum lives in Wrexham. Very old and very doddery with no family close by.  

They have Wrexham third on this list.