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Premier League Round Up (Nov 2-3 2019)


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Saturday was almost a great day for Man City, but not quite. At half time they were losing at home to Southampton while we also trailed at Villa Park.

 

They came back to lead 2-1 late on, while we were still losing. The gap was three points with them coming to Anfield this weekend knowing a win would put them top. Then in the blink of an eye we’d scored twice and the gap was back to six. We’ve been on the other end of that and it’s fucking soul destroying. 

 

No wonder Baldiola was so salty afterwards. Instead of worrying about what we’re doing, he should probably be asking himself how come his side made such hard work out of beating a team that had lost 9-0 at home in their previous game. I usually expect to City win regardless of who they’re playing, but at least in some cases I can talk myself into why the other side might have a chance (Wolves recently is a good example). Southampton though? I gave them a zero percent chance of winning and only a tiny percentage chance of not losing by at least three.

 

Yet but for shite goalkeeping from the recalled Alex McCarthy, they’d have won. Both City goals were easily preventable with a half decent keeper. Actually that’s unfair as I reckon McCarthy is alright usually, but he fucked up on both goals in this one. Mind you, Ederson was even more culpable for the Southampton goal when he fumbled a shot and then almost got kicked in the face by Ward-Prowse as he unsuccessfully tried to retrieve the situation.

 

Some would call that brave, but it doesn’t impress me as he looks like he’s spent his entire life putting his face into situations where it gets booted to fuck. If I had a face like I’d be the same, as what does he have to lose? He’s the only player I’ve ever seen who can get booted in the face by Mané, have a shitload of stitches and somehow end up looking less brutal did he did before. 

 

He was subbed at half time in City’s midweek draw with Atalanta with a minor injury. Hopefully he misses the game on Sunday, not because I see him as being much better than Claudio Bravo, but just so I don’t have to look at him. Don’t get me wrong, I know I’m no Brad Pitt, but he’s just painful to look at and a lot of it is self inflicted. The horrible tatts and the Jaws from James Bond braces, just why??

 

I’m not reading anything into that Atalanta result though as it’s tough going to Italy and winning, especially when you have to play the final 15 minutes with ten men and Kyle Walker in goal. I was hoping that would provide some comic relief and it almost did when he made a pig’s arse out of a free-kick, but after that Atalanta just went backwards and never got near him. Fucking shitbags, a draw was no good to them whatsoever but instead of throwing everything forward, they spent the rest of the game trying to get City players booked and sent off. Normally I’d be all in on that, but not in a Champions League group game as there’s no benefit to us in that.

 

City come to Anfield this week and we’re supposed to believe that David Silva won’t be available. Not buying it. He’ll play. So will his racially insensitive namesake Bernardo, who has somehow managed to get his punished delayed until after this game. Fucking stinks that. If there’s any justice he’ll get a red card, the snide little shitbag.

 

This is just a teaser, click to view the full article

 

Please note that PL Round Ups are only available to website subscribers. Subscriptions cost just £2 a month (you need to register first) and can be purchased here. 

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  • dave u pinned this topic

Highly entertaining roundup as always Dave. I particularly like your Emery observations. He's definitely a bit of a strange fish alright. Like a bastard child of Al Pacino and Robert De Niro

As for Scotland, Tierney's been injured a lot recently so I guess that's a partial excuse as to why they've been so bad

 

Finally as regards excessively tall wide players, I can think of Ian Ormondroyd and Jostein Flo (both for long ball teams) but after that I'm struggling. Surely Pulis had a few at one stage too

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2 hours ago, buster69 said:

Finally as regards excessively tall wide players, I can think of Ian Ormondroyd and Jostein Flo (both for long ball teams) but after that I'm struggling. Surely Pulis had a few at one stage too

 

Flo only played wide so they could launch high diagonal balls at him, so I don't count him. Ormondroyd is a good one though. He was in a long ball team but was more a dribbler wasn't he? Wasn't a physical player, more like Crouch than Flo.

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28 minutes ago, dave u said:

 

Flo only played wide so they could launch high diagonal balls at him, so I don't count him. Ormondroyd is a good one though. He was in a long ball team but was more a dribbler wasn't he? Wasn't a physical player, more like Crouch than Flo.

How about Klas Ingesson of Sweden and Sheff Wed? Seem to remember him as a tall right winger (not lanky, though). 

 

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Your mum knows what's right.  Trust your mum.

Bernardo is a snide little cunt. No two ways about it.  I hope Lovren has a swing and a miss at the ball,  slips and boots that prick in his teeth. 

Superb summary. Really enjoyed it.  Probably shouldn't read it during monotonous meetings at work.  Tough to explain why I'm chuckling away when everyone else is losing the will to live. 

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On 08/11/2019 at 21:13, DaveTucker said:

Great report Dave. Out of interest who annoys you more Newcastle or Villa fans? 

 

Have you or your Mum seen Son's ice cream advert? If not Google it. Proper cringeworthy stuff. 

I'd say Villa fans but it can vary week to week.

 

Haven't seen it, will google it and send it to her to wind her up.

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  • dave u unpinned this topic

Oh my life. Dye? Hardly sweetie. That was 120 knickers worth of London's finest hydrogen peroxide. And, dicko, it was BACK IN THE DAY. As well you know, I've not "dyed" (my arse) it for two years now. And you fancy me even more. You were undressing me with your eyes outside the ground this afternoon. As was Joolz.

 

It was embarrassing. 

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