General Election 2019

[Dr Nowt]

[Aventus]

9 minutes ago, Lizzie Birdsworths Wrinkled Chopper said:

Alexander? 

[Dr Nowt]

2 minutes ago, Aventus said:

Alexander? 

Either the full Alexander De Pfeffel Johnson, that cunt, the gibbering haystack of stale cum, the inside out polar bear caught wanking or something similarly reverential.
 

Never, ever, ever that fucking cosy nickname used to cover up what he is and who he’s for.

[Dr Arthur De Sabre]

13 minutes ago, Lizzie Birdsworths Wrinkled Chopper said:

Either the full Alexander De Pfeffel Johnson, that cunt, the gibbering haystack of stale cum, the inside out polar bear caught wanking or something similarly reverential.
 

Never, ever, ever that fucking cosy nickname used to cover up what he is and who he’s for.

 

15 minutes ago, Aventus said:

Alexander? 

Shithouse Johnson should be his only reference for the rest of the run up.

[Scooby Dudek]

Even the BBC are pointing out his lies;

 

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/election-2019-50624056

 

General Election 2019: Boris Johnson's interview with Andrew Marr fact-checked

 

Boris Johnson gave a wide-ranging interview to the BBC's Andrew Marr programme, focusing on security but also covering Brexit, and the NHS, as well as the plans of the Labour Party. Here are his most eye-catching claims fact-checked.

Claim 1:The government is putting extra money into counter-terrorist policing.

Discussing measures to tackle terrorism in the wake of Friday's London Bridge attacks, Mr Johnson said: "We've obviously invested a great deal in counter-terrorism in the Spending Review. We put another £160m into counter-terrorism."

In September Boris Johnson's government announced its spending plans for 2020-21. These only included increasing funding for counter-terrorism in line with inflation.

Those plans also include a pledge to continue for another year "the additional £160 million announced at Budget 2018."

In fact, Budget 2018 only increased counter-terrorism funding by £59m or 8% on the previous year, as this written answer in the House of Commons shows.

The £160m is the difference between spending plans announced in 2015 and the figure eventually spent in 2019-20.

Claim 2: "Jeremy Corbyn has said he would disband MI5"

BBC News has asked the Conservatives for the evidence behind this claim, and is still awaiting a response. Labour has denied that Jeremy Corbyn wants to disband MI5.

The claim may relate to a campaign in 2015, run by a group called Socialist Campaign for a Labour Victory, which issued a statement with a number of demands including "disband MI5".

Shadow Chancellor John McDonnell is still listed as a signatory on that website. He did admit to signing it according to press reports, though he claimed to have done so in error, and did not support disbanding MI5.

Current shadow Home Secretary Diane Abbott signed a parliamentary motion in 1989 calling for the abolition of MI5, but has since changed her views.

Claim 3: "We have a Queen's Speech that was blocked by Parliament."

In fact the Queen's Speech was passed by 16 votes on 24 October.

Claim 4: The government was already moving to stop automatic early release

Mr Johnson said: "I also said in August that we would no longer allow the automatic early release of serious and violent offenders. And what we are doing now, is there is a bill that was in the Queen's Speech to prevent automatic early release."

The Queen's Speech included a Sentencing Bill, which would change "the automatic release point from halfway to the two-thirds point for adult offenders serving sentences of four years or more for serious violent or sexual offences".

Offenders considered "dangerous" already receive a Extended Determinate Sentence, of which around 250 were imposed last year. They are not considered for release until they have served two-thirds of their sentences.

Claim 5: The largest NHS investments in modern memory

Boris Johnson said: "...we are so determined to make huge investments in the NHS. The largest in modern memory. £34bn."

The Conservatives' plans do involve increasing funding for the NHS in England in cash terms by £34bn. However, accounting for inflation, the real increase would be £20.5bn by 2023-24.

At a 3.2% annual increase, it is less than the 6% average achieved by Labour governments between 1997 and 2010, according to the Health Foundation.

And most of that extra spending was already announced by the government before the election. The Conservative manifesto only pledges to increase health spending in 2023-24 by £2.9bn - just a third of one per centage point more than was already planned, according to the Institute for Fiscal Studies.

 

 

 

 

So basically none of the claims he made are correct. 

Claim 3 - Queens speech being block - I was annoyed Marr didn't call him out for that. All of the others can be argued over semantics but that was a straight it got voted through not blocked you lying prick.

[Bjornebye]

8 minutes ago, Scooby Dudek said:

Even the BBC are pointing out his lies;

 

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/election-2019-50624056

 

General Election 2019: Boris Johnson's interview with Andrew Marr fact-checked

 

Boris Johnson gave a wide-ranging interview to the BBC's Andrew Marr programme, focusing on security but also covering Brexit, and the NHS, as well as the plans of the Labour Party. Here are his most eye-catching claims fact-checked.

Claim 1:The government is putting extra money into counter-terrorist policing.

Discussing measures to tackle terrorism in the wake of Friday's London Bridge attacks, Mr Johnson said: "We've obviously invested a great deal in counter-terrorism in the Spending Review. We put another £160m into counter-terrorism."

In September Boris Johnson's government announced its spending plans for 2020-21. These only included increasing funding for counter-terrorism in line with inflation.

Those plans also include a pledge to continue for another year "the additional £160 million announced at Budget 2018."

In fact, Budget 2018 only increased counter-terrorism funding by £59m or 8% on the previous year, as this written answer in the House of Commons shows.

The £160m is the difference between spending plans announced in 2015 and the figure eventually spent in 2019-20.

Claim 2: "Jeremy Corbyn has said he would disband MI5"

BBC News has asked the Conservatives for the evidence behind this claim, and is still awaiting a response. Labour has denied that Jeremy Corbyn wants to disband MI5.

The claim may relate to a campaign in 2015, run by a group called Socialist Campaign for a Labour Victory, which issued a statement with a number of demands including "disband MI5".

Shadow Chancellor John McDonnell is still listed as a signatory on that website. He did admit to signing it according to press reports, though he claimed to have done so in error, and did not support disbanding MI5.

Current shadow Home Secretary Diane Abbott signed a parliamentary motion in 1989 calling for the abolition of MI5, but has since changed her views.

Claim 3: "We have a Queen's Speech that was blocked by Parliament."

In fact the Queen's Speech was passed by 16 votes on 24 October.

Claim 4: The government was already moving to stop automatic early release

Mr Johnson said: "I also said in August that we would no longer allow the automatic early release of serious and violent offenders. And what we are doing now, is there is a bill that was in the Queen's Speech to prevent automatic early release."

The Queen's Speech included a Sentencing Bill, which would change "the automatic release point from halfway to the two-thirds point for adult offenders serving sentences of four years or more for serious violent or sexual offences".

Offenders considered "dangerous" already receive a Extended Determinate Sentence, of which around 250 were imposed last year. They are not considered for release until they have served two-thirds of their sentences.

Claim 5: The largest NHS investments in modern memory

Boris Johnson said: "...we are so determined to make huge investments in the NHS. The largest in modern memory. £34bn."

The Conservatives' plans do involve increasing funding for the NHS in England in cash terms by £34bn. However, accounting for inflation, the real increase would be £20.5bn by 2023-24.

At a 3.2% annual increase, it is less than the 6% average achieved by Labour governments between 1997 and 2010, according to the Health Foundation.

And most of that extra spending was already announced by the government before the election. The Conservative manifesto only pledges to increase health spending in 2023-24 by £2.9bn - just a third of one per centage point more than was already planned, according to the Institute for Fiscal Studies.

 

 

 

 

So basically none of the claims he made are correct. 

Claim 3 - Queens speech being block - I was annoyed Marr didn't call him out for that. All of the others can be argued over semantics but that was a straight it got voted through not blocked you lying prick.

The words of a lie reach a far bigger audience. They know it. Him, Gove the lot of them have been doing it all along. They know that 20% will question it or see the lie pointed out. "Tell a lie, apologise if we need to but people are thick etc etc" 

[Anubis]

6 hours ago, Lizzie Birdsworths Wrinkled Chopper said:

Get this watched and shared all over the shop

 

Superb

 

 

A very good introduction to the corrupt political system we have, but what is he proposing as a positive alternative? What does vote them out mean, because his target appears to be the entirety of the house. Who is he proposing we vote in?

[Captain Turdseye]

Just now, Anubis said:

A very good introduction to the corrupt political system we have, but what is he proposing as a positive alternative? What does vote them out mean, because his target appears to be the entirety of the house. Who is he proposing we vote in?

 

Northeners and Scottish people. It’s not rocket science. 

[Nelly-Szoboszlai]

[Anubis]

6 minutes ago, Captain Turdseye said:

 

Northeners and Scottish people. It’s not rocket science. 

Well it is, because he’s not offering an alternative.

If he was suggesting we start a new party prioritising social values, citizens first, proportional representation, and possibly regional assemblies, then great, where do I sign up?

 

But vote them out without saying how you want to replace the system is pointless.

[Barrington Womble]

16 minutes ago, Scooby Dudek said:

So basically none of the claims he made are correct. 

Claim 3 - Queens speech being block - I was annoyed Marr didn't call him out for that. All of the others can be argued over semantics but that was a straight it got voted through not blocked you lying prick.

I think it was easy for Marr to miss this as the interview was all over the place because Johnson just refuses to answer any questions and just spouts shit constantly. I thought Marr did as well as you could hope in this situation. 

[Bjornebye]

1 minute ago, Barry Wom said:

I think it was easy for Marr to miss this as the interview was all over the place because Johnson just refuses to answer any questions and just spouts shit constantly. I thought Marr did as well as you could hope in this situation. 

I think he missed a couple of opportunities to jump in and correct or question him but as you say it was a shouting match a lot of the time. The cunt knows what he is doing though, 30 minutes to fill, drag the first load of questions out as long as possible with waffle, brexit and bullshit knowing that as it draws to a close and the difficult questions come he can squirm out of them quicker. 

[Dr Nowt]

Pretty dispiriting at the moment let’s face it, but you can always rely on UKIP. They have a new interim manager who’s been brought into get the wage bill down by releasing some of the ethnics on overly generous contracts and promoting kids from the Hitler youth academy. 
 

I give you renowned intellect and wit - shitwit, to be precise - Pat Mountain. A Catherine Tate character come to life.

 

 

[Dr Nowt]

Apropos of absolutely nothing, if anyone who has photoshop skills fancies editing Pat’s face over Rafa’s, would really appreciate it.

 

[Anubis]

That’s not a face, it’s a mask covering up a being made out of living crawlies - like Mr Oogie Boogie.

[Dr Nowt]

At the UKIP manifesto launch, their campaign coordinator Freddy Vachha arrived back in haste from the 1930’s to deliver this compellingly coherent speech.

 

 

Pat then stood up to say “I’ve never met a racist in Ukip...well maybe a few people on the edge, but not *seriously* racist.”

 

The creators of Inside Number 9 couldn’t write a better pisstake of these people.

[M_B]

Dear god, somebody has been watching too many WW2 films.

[Guest Pistonbroke]

 

Was it held in a broom cupboard? Fucking hell, how could anybody take that shit seriously. 

[Stickman]

 

[Anubis]

What is the monstrous tyranny he speaks of? The EU? Johnson? Scotland? The Wombles?

[Bobby Hundreds]

I think he was on about Ru Paul.

[Dr Nowt]

It’s like an Oswald Mosley biopic starring Orson Welles in those Paul Masson advert outtakes where he’s pissed out of his head.

[Guest Pistonbroke]

Did they finish it before the rapturous applause at the end to hide the fact it was witnessed live by 6 members, a shit journalist or two and the cleaning lady eager to get to her broom? 

[Mudface]

41 minutes ago, Lizzie Birdsworths Wrinkled Chopper said:

It’s like an Oswald Mosley biopic starring Orson Welles in those Paul Masson advert outtakes where he’s pissed out of his head.

MWAAAAAAAH THE FRENCH

[Red Phoenix]

It's official, we can just ignore the polls we don't like now and pay attention to the ones we like the most. Game on, Get Johnson Gone, the reds will soon be under the bed, hail Communism, let's do this.