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Shit things people do on their hols.


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9 minutes ago, Seasons said:

People who ask you how much you paid for your holiday.

 

Usually some old twats who got a last minute deal and got another week for a cheaper cost yet say it in a way thats "oh we must have been lucky" rather than acknowledge you have to book the fucking week off for it months in advance. Blerts. 

My missus's work is full of these. 'Ooh, you want to go to Shit Tours R Us in the town, they did us a great deal'. They fucking didn't, and even if they did, it means driving 300 miles to fucking Manchester, taking the kids out of school and coming back via Gatwick.

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Bad cunts who bag the window seat on the plane, get on last minute* and close the blind for the whole flight. Fucking subhuman scum..

 

* And then 'manspread' like Luciano Pavarotti.

 

And don't get me started on parents who let their beshitted spawn kick the arse out of the seat in front of them the whole fucking flight.

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4 hours ago, Chip Butty said:

Engage or embrace other British people as 'if' we're all in it together. Fuck off with your national flag tatt wearing cunt, you massive malignant cancer on my holiday. 

 

Just fuck off you twat from Reading, Carlisle, Newcastle, Exeter, Croydon - to name but a few. Fuck off and drown. 

 

 

The last thing I want to meet on my break from you fucking lot, is you fucking lot. 

Close thread 

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3 hours ago, Nelly-Torres said:

I'm contemplating doing a bit of a mini tour of European cities. On a budget. So all self booked, rather than an organised tour. 

 

Not a gripe about travellers, but airlines. In particular, flight times. There's hardly any in between. It's mainly a choice of having to be at the airport stupid early, or getting to your destination late so you have to pay for an extra nights accommodation without getting any time in your chosen destination on that particular first day. 

 

A nice 11 o'clock flight getting you to your destination at about 1 to 3 o'clock would be just fine. 

 

Awkward fucks! 

Destinations? 

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2 hours ago, Seasons said:

People who tell you about a place they've stayed at. Bang on about it likes it's absolutely amazing, perfect location, boss rooms, breakfast ace and easy to get to. 

 

Then you arrive in some shite 2* equivalent to a Blackpool hotel complete with Tony Jones tribute bands singing until 3am in the morning. 

Doctor Troy and Liverpool Lad have lost a lot of mates through that tactic.

 

I admire that ingenuity to get rid of annoying cunts who you sometime get stuck with. 

 

Liverpool Lad recently recommended Haiti for me. Said its boss weather this time of year. can't wait. 

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Guest Pistonbroke

I once spoke to a bloke on holiday quite a few years ago who brought his own portable TV with him thinking it would automatically get UK TV on it. 

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2 minutes ago, Elite said:

Tell him take his aerial next time

 

I was tempted to buy a cheap one and flog it to him for an extortionate price. 

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People who take photographs of every fucking thing. "heres our John swimming up to the pool bar" "here is Hector, such a nice man, said he can't wait to see us next year AND he wants to come to England how cute" "This is me having a shit" 

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Was in a hotel in Benidorm about 3 years ago and some twat was moaning to me about our hotel and how shit it was. It was basic but perfectly adequate for the £300 a week to the daft get was paying, dont really know what he was expecting.

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2 hours ago, Bjornebye said:

People who take photographs of every fucking thing. "heres our John swimming up to the pool bar" "here is Hector, such a nice man, said he can't wait to see us next year AND he wants to come to England how cute" "This is me having a shit" 

 

That one's aimed at Turdzy, isn't it?

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20 hours ago, Bjornebye said:

Doctor Troy and Liverpool Lad have lost a lot of mates through that tactic.

 

I admire that ingenuity to get rid of annoying cunts who you sometime get stuck with. 

 

Liverpool Lad recently recommended Haiti for me. Said its boss weather this time of year. can't wait. 

No. These people make out they are going to do allkinds on holiday but end up just wandering aimlessly or doing nothing. 

 

I recommended a load of places to eat in Sorrento to a woman in work but as she was a bad mingebag she wouldn't go to any of them once she saw the price of the menu. 

 

The place is already expensive so it shouldn't have come as a surprise that she had to pay a little bit more than 4 euros for a main course.

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23 hours ago, Seasons said:

People who tell you about a place they've stayed at. Bang on about it likes it's absolutely amazing, perfect location, boss rooms, breakfast ace and easy to get to. 

 

Then you arrive in some shite 2* equivalent to a Blackpool hotel complete with Tony Jones tribute bands singing until 3am in the morning. 

A fella in work goes the same place in Greece every year. Goes on about it like it's the best place in the world. As he's been there more than 10 years on the run he says "cant wait to meet my mates back in Greece". This fella is a total knob who most people cannot tolerate so the staff and bar owners must dread him turning up every year. He pays about a grand to stay in these apartments that have a small pool below. It looks like the apartment blocks that the Beastie boys chase Sir Stewart Wallace into the pool in the video Sabotage.

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2 hours ago, A Red said:

Was in a hotel in Benidorm about 3 years ago and some twat was moaning to me about our hotel and how shit it was. It was basic but perfectly adequate for the £300 a week to the daft get was paying, dont really know what he was expecting.

Went to Kusadasi ages ago and we went out to some show in the night as a tour. Got on the bus and some woman said our hotel looked nice then proceeded to rant about her hotel for 20 minutes. Turns out she only paid 200 quid for a week all inclusive. And she wondered why her hotel looked like the prison from.Midnight Express and the beer was weak as piss.

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2 hours ago, Doctor Troy said:

A fella in work goes the same place in Greece every year. Goes on about it like it's the best place in the world. As he's been there more than 10 years on the run he says "cant wait to meet my mates back in Greece". This fella is a total knob who most people cannot tolerate so the staff and bar owners must dread him turning up every year. He pays about a grand to stay in these apartments that have a small pool below. It looks like the apartment blocks that the Beastie boys chase Sir Stewart Wallace into the pool in the video Sabotage.

Husband of a girl I worked with isn't a bad lad, but every time I see him as soon as he has a few scoops in him he keeps going on about how he has found a place in Turkey where the all-inclusive drinks go on until 2am rather than the usual midnight. I have gone from feigning interest, to politely deflecting, to threatening to kill him if he mentions it again but he won't let it go.

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On 28/08/2019 at 20:51, Trumo said:

This is more about types of irritants than what they do:

 

I just can't get my head around people who go to all-inclusive resorts and spend all day lounging round the pool, and all night in the bar, never once bothering to see anything outside that resort.

 

People who just want to drink. Shit phrases like "larging it" and "living my one life" make a frequent appearance with these people. If you need to get pissed before you can enjoy something, it was already shit to begin with, so why bother?

 

People who have loads of kids and take them all on holiday, clearly annoyed that they'll have to spend any time with the kids at all.

 

People who can't wait to start slagging places off on the likes of Trip Advisor because of some (very) minor issue that was probably caused by ther own ineptitude in the first place.

 

The bit about drinking is always an issue for me. I drank my fair share (and probably a few other peoples share) from about the age of 16 as I could get served in pubs no problem but was generally bored of it by the time I was around 19 or 20 years old. People look at me like I've said I fuck kids in response to me saying that I have at most a couple of drinks every few months.

 

Like I'm the one who has the problem because I don't get shit faced every weekend. 

 

On 28/08/2019 at 21:39, General Dryness said:

Needless to say, you had the last laugh. 

Precisely the reason for the valium and librium I would have thought.

 

I wouldn't go back there without a nice big bag of crack swishing around my system.

I've only ever been to the Isle of Man for motorsport reasons but I always really liked it. We used to rent a house in Foxdale just down from Costains srap yard. I'm fairly certain the pub not far from it was the inspiration for deliverance. 

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4 hours ago, chevettehs said:

I've only ever been to the Isle of Man for motorsport reasons but I always really liked it. We used to rent a house in Foxdale just down from Costains srap yard. I'm fairly certain the pub not far from it was the inspiration for deliverance. 

Aye the old place isn't so bad. Bit dull when the races aren't on, but no worse than any other seaside town in england. Definitely not as shite as Morecambe though.

 

Bit of trivia, Foxdale is like the equivalent of how Kerry is to the rest of Ireland. People in the rest of Britain take the piss out of the manx for being inbred, the manx take the piss out of people from Foxdale. The pub you're talking about is probably The Baltic. Rough old joint that.

 

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