Quantcast
Who will replace her? NSFT - GF - General Forum - The Liverpool Way Jump to content
Sign in to follow this  
Bjornebye

Who will replace her? NSFT

Recommended Posts

(Not Safe For Tories)

 

Farewell ya dusty bing-bag! Now, which fucking pompous , self-serving evil cunt will fill her not so ruby slippers? 

 

Boris is bookies favourite. Eurgh just imagine that. In-fact dont. Britain is already a laughing stock as it is. I'd emigrate. 

 

Dominic Raab is next. Dont know much about him other than he is a lying fraudulant tory cunt. 

 

Michael Gove the fucking lying shifty shyster is next. 

 

Jeremy Hunt is next the absolute Jeremy Hunt

 

Fuck em all. We are all fucked

 

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

It’s going to be the inside out polar bear caught wanking.

 

As such, a good time to revisit the masterful takedown of his book on Churchill and with it his entire unctuous fucking lizard-like MO.

 

Formatting no doubt dreadful.

 

 
13 NOVEMBER 2014 

“One man who made history” by another who seems just to make it up: Boris on Churchill

The book reads as if it was dictated, not written. All the way through we hear Boris’s voice; it’s like being cornered in the Drones Club and harangued for hours by Bertie Wooster.

Looking to Europe: after the Second World War, Churchill became an advocate of the need to build European unity
LOOKING TO EUROPE: AFTER THE SECOND WORLD WAR, CHURCHILL BECAME AN ADVOCATE OF THE NEED TO BUILD EUROPEAN UNITY 

The Churchill Factor: How One Man Made History 

Boris Johnson 

Hodder & Stoughton, 408pp, £25

Boris Johnson, as the subtitle of this book proclaims, is a firm believer in the “great man” theory of history. Not for him the subtleties of the complex interplay of historical forces and individual personalities. Subtlety is not Boris’s strong point. Winston Churchill alone, he writes, “saved our civilisation”. He “invented the RAF and the tank”. He founded the welfare state (although Boris gives David Lloyd George a bit of credit for this, as well). All of this, he argues, confounds what he sees as the fashion of the past few decades to write off “so-called great men and women” as “meretricious bubbles on the vast tides of social history”. The story of Winston Churchill “is a pretty withering retort to all that malarkey. He, and he alone, made the difference.”

Marxists, he writes, go eat your words. Except that it’s not just Marxists who have argued for the impact of wider economic, social, cultural and even ideological forces on history. Anyone who has the time or energy to press a couple of keys on a computer to look up “tank”, “RAF”, “welfare state” or even “the Second World War” on Wikipedia will see Boris’s sweeping claims vanish in a cloud of inconvenient facts. Churchill did not, as Boris claims, invent the term “Iron Curtain” to describe the barrier between Soviet-dominated Europe and western Europe. It was first used by the Nazis – above all, by their propaganda minister Joseph Goebbels. Nor did he invent the term “Middle East”: it was coined by the American naval thinker Alfred T Mahan in 1902.

At many junctures in the book, the ability to think historically deserts its author. He describes men such as Hitler as “short” when their height (5ft 8in in his case) exactly matched the average height of European men at the time; and he describes Churchill as a “Victorian Whig”, though the Whigs’ attitude to the state in legislation such as the 1834 Poor Law was entirely different to Churchill’s. The contemporary references to television shows such as Downton Abbey are among the many factors that will ensure this book has a very brief shelf life. Boris writes disapprovingly of the extramarital affairs of Edith Aylesford, a society lady of the late-Victorian era. “That was how they carried on in those days, you see,” he comments. Not just in those days, Boris.

Johnson doesn’t weigh up policies and ideas with any care or penetration. If he doesn’t like them, he dismisses them as “rot”, “tripe”, “loopy”, “bonkers”, “barmy” or “nuts”; their advocates and practitioners as “loonies”, “plodders”, “Stilton-eating surrender monkeys”, and so on.

 

Let’s Get Hyper-Personal

Read more
Sponsored by Oracle
cksync.php?cs=3&type=ayl&ovsid=000000000
 
info-ayl.png

There are some truly cringe-making metaphors and wordplay in the book. Churchill, we learn, was “mustard keen on gas” as a weapon in the First World War. He was “the large protruding nail on which destiny snagged her coat”. Young Tories “think of him as the people of Parma think of the formaggio Parmigiano. He is their biggest cheese.” And Chamberlain’s “refusal to stand up to Hitler” was “spaghetti-like” (clearly Boris is rather fond of Italian food).

The book reads as if it was dictated, not written. All the way through we hear Boris’s voice; it’s like being cornered in the Drones Club and harangued for hours by Bertie Wooster. The gung-ho style inhibits thought instead of stimulating it. There’s huge condescension here. The Churchill Factor advertises itself as an attempt to educate “young people” who think that Churchill is a bulldog in a television advertisement rather than Britain’s greatest statesman but talking down to them is no way to achieve this aim.

In a book that involves a good deal of modern European history, Boris the Eurosceptic clearly doesn’t find it necessary to master the details. Croatia, he tells us casually, was ruled by “some Ustasha creep or other” in the interwar years (it was not), while in the same period there was a plague of “communist uprisings in eastern Europe” (there was not). The Cecilienhof Palace in Potsdam, he writes in his offhand way, was “originally intended for some minor offshoot of the Hohenzollern dynasty” (it was not – it was built for the crown prince, heir to the German throne). He thinks that German industrial relations before 1914 were characterised by “co-operation between bosses and workers” (they were not). Hitler did not plan to kill the disabled, as he claims: most of the disabled in Germany in the 1930s were war veterans. The Germans did not capture Stalingrad, though this book claims they did.

 

in-art-close-icon-128x128-16481b937f87b2
–– ADVERTISEMENT ––
 
unmiss-sound-button-muted-e74d67a0c85c35

Boris ties himself up in knots trying to distance Churchill from the idea of European unity, salvaging a mildly sceptical quote from the apogee of his imperialist enthusiasm in the 1930s to undermine his hero’s advocacy of European unity in the 1950s.

Present-day politics obtrude in other ways, too. Anyone who wonders why Boris has written this book need look no further than the general election that is due in a few months’ time. If the Conservatives lose, the leadership of the party will be up for grabs and Boris will be a candidate. Writing a book about Churchill might help people take him seriously. After all, Churchill, he writes, “spoke in short Anglo-Saxon zingers”. He was a “rogue elephant” in the Tory party. He made a career as a highly paid journalist. He was definitely not a “lefty-liberal Milquetoast”. “He was no party-pooper.” He was “incorrigibly cheerful” and his verbal style was both “demotic and verbally inventive”. He “incarnated something essential about the British character – and that was his continual and unselfconscious eccentricity”. Now, who is this meant to remind you of? 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I’d go for Mark Francois, so I could enjoy watching him be boiled alive but still drown first because he’d be out of his depth in a sink.

 

Obviously my first choice would be to see him raped by an angry boar, but I’m prepared to compromise in the spirit of national unity.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I hope Hunt gets it, because seeing him at PMQ would show him up for the incompetent, know nothing fuck that he is. 

 

If Boris gets on the ballot he will win, just be interesting to see if enough MPs hate him to nominate him. I believe they will for two reasons; 

1 The Tory membership will lynch them if they don't.

2 People seem to believe having Boris as PM will help MPs retain their seats. 

 

Again Tory MPs will doing something that they hope is best for them as opposed to what they actually believe in. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
16 minutes ago, Bjornebye said:

I swerved a poll because no-one would want to cast such a hideous vote. It would like voting for how you wish to die. 

Can we have a poll on how we wish for them to die?

  • Upvote 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

They're all utterly hideous prospects. I can't ever before remember looking at the House of Commons and thinking that there's not one jot of prime ministerial quality about any of them. Absolute bunch of cunts. Sack the fucking lot of them and start again.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
3 minutes ago, Spy Bee said:

A bit left field, but judging by Game of Thrones, I am opting for Oscar Pistorious.

Just had to try and explain what I am laughing at to some lad in-front of me. He now thinks I am a weird unfunny forum nerd. Cheers cunt. 

  • Upvote 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

If Boris gets to the final two he’ll walk it, no question. If he doesn’t - and let’s face it most of the Tory MPs hate him - then it’ll be whoever is seen as the most pro brexit of the two. 

 

I don't think they’ll make the mistake of voting for a former remainer like Hunt after the mess May has left behind, no matter how much they say they’re behind brexit now.

 

Whoever it is, I’m sure they’ll be a damn sight worse than May. I actually think it being Boris might be a good thing. He’s a incompetent bullshitter playing at being a populist and he’ll soon have terrible approval ratings across the country (though I’m not sure how much that will affect him, after all Corbyn has had historic lows for an opposition leader for a while now but seems to be going nowhere).

 

There are worse, more extreme right wing MPs than say Boris and Jarvid out there though. Leadsom for example or McVey but I’d hope they won’t make it to the run off.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
29 minutes ago, Bjornebye said:

I swerved a poll because no-one would want to cast such a hideous vote. It would like voting for how you wish to die. 

 

Deadpool - The Tories edition? 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
55 minutes ago, Bjornebye said:

(Not Safe For Tories)

 

Farewell ya dusty bing-bag! Now, which fucking pompous , self-serving evil cunt will fill her not so ruby slippers? 

 

Boris is bookies favourite. Eurgh just imagine that. In-fact dont. Britain is already a laughing stock as it is. I'd emigrate. 

 

Dominic Raab is next. Dont know much about him other than he is a lying fraudulant tory cunt. 

 

Michael Gove the fucking lying shifty shyster is next. 

 

Jeremy Hunt is next the absolute Jeremy Hunt

 

Fuck em all. We are all fucked

 

 

Johnson shortly followed by riots. Not directly related to his appointment, but the sheer pointlessness of it all will lead to a level of general despair leading to rage that won't be easily contained. 

 

Darkest just before the dawn and all that, but none of this stuff on either side of the Atlantic is going down well with the kids.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
Sign in to follow this  

×