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Featured: That was the week that was (April 13-19 2019)


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Saturday Apr 13:
 
After all their chest thumping last week when they beat Arsenal (who are shite away from home and had one win in their last nine on their travels), Everton lost at Fulham today. Ryan Babel made the first and scored the second, and they couldn’t get near him all day. I might shit a lung here. Imagine the fume in the away end as his bright red head was bearing down on their goal. Great stuff.

 

Klopp says it might be a while before we see Ox back in the team and regrets that he got a bit carried away and said he’d be back soon when Ox first returned to training. He saw Ox in training, looking boss, and completely went against all the advice the medical staff had given him and went and got everyone’s hopes up! He’s like a big kid sometimes isn’t he? Just so excitable. 

 

In other news, there are reports that Rafa Camacho has turned down a new contract and will be sold for £10m. Wolves are among several clubs showing an interest. He probably should turn down a new deal as he won’t make it here.

 

Demba Ba says he didn’t feel sorry for Gerrard after the slip. So fucking what? You think Stevie would want your sympathy? As if he’d even fucking care what you think. Gerrard is a legend of the game, Demba Ba was a journeyman famous for one lucky goal. Fuck Demba Ba, the prick.

 

Finally today, Paul Merson says Hudson-Odoi is the big threat to us tomorrow, and not Eden Hazard. “They will know all about Hazard and if he plays they will make sure he doesn’t get the ball. But they haven’t faced Hudson-Odoi before. They won’t know him as well and they will try and play him one v one. Good luck with that”.

 

I know he’s thick but even he can’t believe that? He has to be saying it just to be 'edgy' or to get attention. It’s like me saying that the best analysis of tomorrow’s game will come from Merson or Danny Murphy and not Carra or Neville. 

 

Hazard terrifies me. He could beat us single handedly if he's on it, as sometimes he's quite literally unstoppable. If Hudson-Odoi plays he won’t even get a kick as he’ll be up against Robbo.


Sunday Apr 14:

 

L 2 Chelsea 0. Massive win, especially as we had to play directly after City had won at Palace. The lads just aren’t letting any of that shit effect them so far. They just go out and do their thing irrespective of what City have done.

 

Chelsea weren’t great and we were fairly comfortable winners, but we had to wait until after half time to take the lead. It’d be nice if we could score in the first ten minutes of every game like City do. Ok, today they had to wait until 15 minutes, which must have seemed like an eternity to them.

 

We were great in that second half though. As soon as the whistle blew to kick things off, we were all over them and wouldn’t let them get out of their own half. No-one can live with us when we play like that. The boys were like a swarm of angry wasps. Look at the first goal. We scored that through intensity.

 

The second goal was different, that was just sheer quality from Mo. What a fucking strike. The noise after that went in was spine tingling. We deserve this title and we’d have been crowned Champions already if there wasn’t one team ignoring all the fucking rules that the rest of us are playing by. 

 

Sarri did us a favour by starting Hazard as a number nine, but when he switched to the left all hell broke loose and he could easily have dragged Chelsea back into it. As for Hudson-Odoi, yeah he didn’t get a kick.  

 

The u23s also had a big win today. 6-0 at Leicester. Could easily have been double that as they were sensational. Camacho scored three (should have had six), Brewster got one (should have had three), Jones got one (should have had two) and Woodburn slotted a pen. 

 

Brewster is looking sharp since he came back, he might even make the bench before the season is out. Ox had another run out and Gomez played an hour or so at right back.

 

Camacho’s future looks even more uncertain tonight though as he took to Instagram afterwards to have a moan. 

"I do not know whose idea it is, but I will prove that they are mistaken about my football. I'm not a right defender, I'm an attacker who scores goals. This is my DNA. Happy to score three goals and help the team in today’s win vs Leicester."

 

Bye then.

 

 

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That's is arse-puckeringly cringey stuff, and the announcer sounds like he's being told who each player is. Just like those newsreaders on the BBC who rely on the autocue whenever they have to do a sports round-up. You know the ones. If the story was about the royals or the Tory party, they know the entire family tree and the name and government role of every MP. Bring up sport, and it's all "Barcelona are through to the Champions...League semi finals after two goals from...Lionel (as in 'Richie')...uh...Messi set them on their way to a convincing...uh...four...goals to...nil...win on aggregate."

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Well i for one cannot wait for VAR. Anything that helps out the geriatric knob jockeys who are currently refereeing in the Premier League. Call me biased but i think it will be good for us as we have been on the wrong side of more shite (ok biased) decisions then i could throw a hat at.

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