Getting Old

[Dr Nowt]

31 minutes ago, Rico1304 said:

I’m getting on a plane in...24 hours.  Thanks. 

As you’re pinned right back in your seat and the engines are screaming, just imagine I’m sat next to you and that’s what I’d be saying.

 

Hope it’s a relaxing flight.

[Bjornebye]

1 hour ago, Rico1304 said:

I’m getting on a plane in...24 hours.  Thanks. 

Alcohol is your friend. 

 

 

 

 

Last thing you want to be is sober when the pilot tells you that the next bump will be the sea, at 40'000 miles an hour 

 

 

Give my regards to Norris (My Hammerhead friend, she is lovely) 

[lifetime fan]

My ol fella is scared shitless of flying. He’ll have 2 Valium and 10 pints of Guinness before stepping foot on a plane. 

 

For his birthday his missus took him on holiday to Cyprus and bought him a hot air ballon ride. 

 

And told him next year she’s buying him a flight in a microlight plane! 

[VladimirIlyich]

49 minutes ago, lifetime fan said:

My ol fella is scared shitless of flying. He’ll have 2 Valium and 10 pints of Guinness before stepping foot on a plane. 

 

For his birthday his missus took him on holiday to Cyprus and bought him a hot air ballon ride. 

 

And told him next year she’s buying him a flight in a microlight plane! 

She is a seriously sick puppy. I like her.

[General Dryness]

3 hours ago, Jennings said:

When you think 45 is young.

I'm turning 45 in about 3 weeks. A mere baby.

[lifetime fan]

1 hour ago, VladimirIlyich said:

She is a seriously sick puppy. I like her.

 

She’s great. 

[Guest Pistonbroke]

When you get invited to parties and the nearer the date comes you just can't be arsed. 

[Guest]

11 hours ago, Rico1304 said:

I’m getting on a plane in...24 hours.  Thanks. 

I wouldn't worry at all about getting on a plane...so long as you get off at the other end.

[Guest]

11 hours ago, Rico1304 said:

I’m getting on a plane in...24 hours.  Thanks. 

I wouldn't worry at all about getting on a plane...so long as you get off at the other end.

[Guest]

 

[Ken Robber]

Turned 26 last week. 

 

Not arsed (yet) about ageing but having a receding hairline without being able to grow a beard is a ballache. Proper Benjamin Button head

[Dr Nowt]

26?

 

TWENTY SIX?

 

[cloggypop]

2 hours ago, Ken Robber said:

Turned 26 last week. 

 

Not arsed (yet) about ageing but having a receding hairline without being able to grow a beard is a ballache. Proper Benjamin Button head

Unless you are a rock star you're probably alright like. 

[Captain Turdseye]

Remember when 17/18 year olds used to post on here? Why doesn’t that happen anymore? People might start to think that posting on internet message boards isn’t a cool thing to do. 

[Rico1304]

22 hours ago, Lizzie Birdsworths Wrinkled Chopper said:

As you’re pinned right back in your seat and the engines are screaming, just imagine I’m sat next to you and that’s what I’d be saying.

 

Hope it’s a relaxing flight.

I’m struggling now, apparently this plane doesnt have a bar on board!  

[Rico1304]

We are taxiing now. When do I say it?  (For real)

[Dr Nowt]

Before the plane straightens out, when you’re still going up. About 3/4 of the way into the ascent.

[Guest Pistonbroke]

2 hours ago, Captain Turdseye said:

Remember when 17/18 year olds used to post on here? Why doesn’t that happen anymore? People might start to think that posting on internet message boards isn’t a cool thing to do. 

Operation Yewtree. 

[stringvest]

Dunno, haven’t got there yet.  

 

Oh, hang on, actually it was the other day when I was tagged on a Facebook picture with my other half, and that fat beardy twat Dan said she looked like my carer.  

 

[Davelfc]

Forums are like recording a TV show as opposed to playing to a live audience. The youth of today want instant gratification and attention. 

 

If you want attention on a forum then you have to be a nutter, or hold a radical opinion or both. Posting moderate and well thought out content will only get you so far. 

 

There is one exception. If I post something slightly inacurate on a forum then within seconds someone will have responded posting out my mistake. If however I request information concerning that subject then I could wait days for a reply. Which leads to the well known statement if you want to know something on a forum, don't ask, just make a post that you know is incorrect and someone will be along to correct you very quickly. 

 

People mumble on about political correctness and when you complain people accuse you of just wanting to post racist or sexist stuff. The truth is however we are losing the ability to say common sense things that may offend people's delicate disposition. We now have to tiptoe around and as a result we are breeding such delicate snowflakes that they are incapable of looking to take on a challenge the it faces them. 

 

The best part of getting old is that I will not be around when this handcart reaches hell. 

 

 

[VladimirIlyich]

1 hour ago, φαίνω said:

Forums are like recording a TV show as opposed to playing to a live audience. The youth of today want instant gratification and attention. 

 

If you want attention on a forum then you have to be a nutter, or hold a radical opinion or both. Posting moderate and well thought out content will only get you so far. 

 

There is one exception. If I post something slightly inacurate on a forum then within seconds someone will have responded posting out my mistake. If however I request information concerning that subject then I could wait days for a reply. Which leads to the well known statement if you want to know something on a forum, don't ask, just make a post that you know is incorrect and someone will be along to correct you very quickly. 

 

People mumble on about political correctness and when you complain people accuse you of just wanting to post racist or sexist stuff. The truth is however we are losing the ability to say common sense things that may offend people's delicate disposition. We now have to tiptoe around and as a result we are breeding such delicate snowflakes that they are incapable of looking to take on a challenge the it faces them. 

 

The best part of getting old is that I will not be around when this handcart reaches hell. 

 

 

The handcart's legs are already touching the flames.

[Guest Pistonbroke]

I rarely get a cold but have been bunged up with a nasty one for the last 10 days, head feels like exploding when I cough and it eventually became a bit chesty. That fuck this and went to the docs in case I needed antibiotics, turns out I have Bronchitis. Hope this shit isn't going to be a regular thing. 

[VladimirIlyich]

1 minute ago, Pistonbroke said:

I rarely get a cold but have been bunged up with a nasty one for the last 10 days, head feels like exploding when I cough and it eventually became a bit chesty. That fuck this and went to the docs in case I needed antibiotics, turns out I have Bronchitis. Hope this shit isn't going to be a regular thing. 

Do you smoke mate? Knock them on the head sharpish if you do.

[Guest Pistonbroke]

1 minute ago, VladimirIlyich said:

Do you smoke mate? Knock them on the head sharpish if you do.

 

Yeah, but I only smoke about 5 a day. The last 10 days I've hardly had any. I'm hoping it is only a one off, the whole family caught this cold, even the dog. If this bronchitis shit becomes a regular thing with each and every cold then I'll certainly be knocking them on the head, as it is I enjoy a tab now and again without it being a necessity. 

[VladimirIlyich]

1 hour ago, Pistonbroke said:

 

Yeah, but I only smoke about 5 a day. The last 10 days I've hardly had any. I'm hoping it is only a one off, the whole family caught this cold, even the dog. If this bronchitis shit becomes a regular thing with each and every cold then I'll certainly be knocking them on the head, as it is I enjoy a tab now and again without it being a necessity. 

You probably have been told it many times but quitting is best solution as even casual smoking can still cause problems. Not easy I know but its best solution.