Someone's having a real laugh - sperm of gollum to Utd.

[littletedwest]

He could be there ballotelli, fingers crossed 

[The Guest]

10 minutes ago, littletedwest said:

He could be there ballotelli, fingers crossed 

He could be anywhere to be fair.

[Chocoholic]

Fuck sake, what astronomic wages are they going to be paying Cavani? Not to mention the huge wedge for his agent. They do love a big name, regardless of how old they are.

2 hours ago, MegadriveMan said:

The comments on RedCafe are a sight to behold!

 

https://www.redcafe.net/threads/cavani-talks-ongoing-with-manutd.457783/page-14

Cavani shits all over Ighalo and can probably offer cover across all three front positions. Not a bad bit of business, not sure why we had to leave it so late.

Because he doesn’t want to come to England. He’s said in previous interviews that English women are dirty and don’t use a bidet. The only reason he wants to join us is because his first choices don’t want him and we are the only club desperate and can pay his high salary demands.

 

This is the level of discussion over there. Loads of them saying 'Pay him £150K a week' which is just ridiculous. Not a chance they're going to talk to Cavani's agent and then only offer £150K a week.

 

Others saying it's like Sanchez, or even Falcao mk2. To be honest, I'd forgotten that stroke of genius. Four goals for a total of £4M a piece and £600K every time he pulled the shirt on.

 

It's fuckin' beautiful!

[Megadrive Man]

If they had genuinely wanted Cavani they could have got him months ago, or they could have even waited until after the deadline to sign him as he's a free agent?

 

It's a definite case of Panic stations!

[Barrington Womble]

2 hours ago, Section_31 said:

I'm gonna go out on a limb here and say if he scores at some stage he'll be declared a masterstroke and their front three every bit the equal of ours, as they draw and lose the following matches despair will quickly return, Gary Neville will blame Edward Woodward and glazers out will trend on twitter.

I thought their front 3 was already better than ours? That was the narrative in the mini covid season. Surely that hasn't changed in 2 games? 

[Section_31]

3 minutes ago, Barrington Womble said:

I thought their front 3 was already better than ours? That was the narrative in the mini covid season. Surely that hasn't changed in 2 games? 

I think they're glum again, it's an evolving situation.

[Jairzinho]

They'll sign Cavani on a four year deal, £350k p/w. He'll score a couple of goals, then get injured, then the following season they'll loan him to Palermo while paying 97% of his wages. Meanwhile Edwards will sign Rashford for £750k, and Klopp will turn him into the next Mane.

[Ne Moe Imya]

4 hours ago, 3 Stacks said:

They're signing Cavani, which isn't a terrible short term move, but when the alternative was getting Sancho, it's pretty hilarious. 

4 league goals last season, will want huge wages and his legs have pretty much fallen off.

 

I'd say it's a pretty terrible move, short-term, medium-term, and especially long-term. I'm definitely going to laugh when the wage figures come out. Makes the Ighalo signing look sensible.

[Ne Moe Imya]

Oh my word, tracking along with that Redcafe link and they've posted this video of his performances last season.

 

It's hilarious, like someone made a well-meaning video of Ricky Lambert's time with us which only revealed how limited he was. I'm only 2:00 minutes in but it's pretty funny. He's scored one decent goal, a penalty and the rest of the "highlights" are just him being tackled or passing the ball to a fullback or something you'd expect any average player to be able to do.

 

 

[M_B]

He's like Ibrahimovic.

 

Only really, really shit.

[polymerpunkah]

But can he dive convincingly?

 

[JagSquared]

I’m on a WhatsApp football group with mates who support various teams. Some of the united fans are trying to make out Cavani will be a Zlatan-esque signing while others are pointing out he’s been playing in a farmers league for 7 years and is past it. The bickering amongst them is brilliant I can’t help but fan the flames every so often.

[Scott_M]

Can’t believe they are re-signing Falcao. 

[Leyton388]

Hahaha

 

Sancho>>>>>>>>>>>>Dembeĺe>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>Cavani

 

How the mighty have fallen  

[Numero Veinticinco]

The only reason to sign Cavani would be to give the fans a ‘big name signing’. It would sum up everything that’s wrong at United. 

[Elite]

It's like telling everyone you've got a Coronation Street star coming around for tea.

 

"Well we tried to get Jim McDonald and Ken Barlow but they just ignored our calls. We then asked Ashley Peacock but he said we aren't worth his while, so we ended up with that eco-warrior Spider who was great in the show about 20 years ago, he'll be brilliant."

[Anubis]

£200k a week rumour. They’ve learnt nothing from the Sanchez debacle.

[Pete]

6 minutes ago, Anubis said:

£200k a week rumour. They’ve learnt nothing from the Sanchez debacle.

Yeah but he’s also got to fight He-Man on a weekly basis too so that’s actually a pretty fair salary. 

[Ron B]

3 hours ago, JagSquared said:

I’m on a WhatsApp football group with mates who support various teams. Some of the united fans are trying to make out Cavani will be a Zlatan-esque signing

I am hearing the same. But... even if it’s a two-year deal, wages of £10m a year, plus £10m for his agent, that’s still an awful lot of money. Plus Ibrahimović’s second second was dreadful. Seven games, and a solitary goal during a League Cup defeat your Bristol City. If that’s your best case scenario, maybe it’s time to make different plans. 

[Barrington Womble]

2 hours ago, Elite said:

It's like telling everyone you've got a Coronation Street star coming around for tea.

 

"Well we tried to get Jim McDonald and Ken Barlow but they just ignored our calls. We then asked Ashley Peacock but he said we aren't worth his while, so we ended up with that eco-warrior Spider who was great in the show about 20 years ago, he'll be brilliant."

Negged for bringing coronation Street into a thread on the FF. In fact any thread. 

[clangers]

Is the £10m signing fee for Cavani true? That's completely insane for player so far past his best with a terrible recent injury record who has been passed around multiple European clubs this summer all of whom have declined.

 

A desperate move attempting to buy a big name to cover for another inept transfer window.

[Elite]

2 hours ago, Barrington Womble said:

Negged for bringing coronation Street into a thread on the FF. In fact any thread. 

Probably justified but very damaging to my self-esteem, I hope you can live with yourself.

[No2]

The idea of an experienced striker to add to the youthful front 3 is sound. Problem with Utd is they done this about 6 weeks ago. Whatever anout paying Cavani 200 grand a week, they will now be paying Igahlo 150 grand for absolutely zilch.

[Barrington Womble]

42 minutes ago, No2 said:

The idea of an experienced striker to add to the youthful front 3 is sound. Problem with Utd is they done this about 6 weeks ago. Whatever anout paying Cavani 200 grand a week, they will now be paying Igahlo 150 grand for absolutely zilch.

Fuck me, do they really pay that for igahlo?! Did they get him for free?

[Pidge]

They're covering the ridiculous money he was earning in China.