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World Cup 2018 Round Up (Days 11-13)


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England looked impressive in their second match, albeit against arguably the worst World Cup team I’ve ever seen. Fucking Panama. *shakes head* Utterly hopeless they were, they were more concerned with sniding it up than defending. Proper dirty bastards they were, although I need to temper any criticism of that given how much of a hypocrite it would make me. 
 
I mean how can I have a go at someone for smashing Jesse Lingard in the gob considering I’ve spent the last two years harping on about how punchable his face is? Diego Torres just lived my dream. 
Harry Kane might be the spawniest footballer of all time. Don’t get me wrong, he’s a great centre forward, but fucking hell, he’s had two tap ins, two pens and a total fluke and now he’s the leading scorer. Such a jammy twat.
 
I can’t be doing with all the over the top praise he’s getting for 1) being lucky and 2) being able to take a boss pen. Even Trent was at it, tweeting “Harry Kane is on (insert flame emojis)”. Unless he was just fantasising about setting fire to him. Yeah, I’ll go with that. 
 
If defenders want to try and belly to belly duplex him on every fucking corner then Kane will not only win the Golden Boot, he’ll smash every tournament record in the process. What the fuck are these knob heads doing? Tunisia got away with it a few times in the first game and the Swiss completely mugged Mitrovic without being punished, but VAR got hammered because of those and refs are going to be on the lookout for them a lot more now (as we’ve seen since). 
 
The ref in this game could easily have awarded another two or three pens because Kane was being bear hugged on every single set-piece. Maguire too sometimes. It’s difficult for the smaller nations to outplay the bigger ones, I get that as there’s a gulf in talent. It’s not too much to ask for them to defend a fucking corner without slapping people in bear hugs though. 
 
Credit where it’s due though, England are doing well but let’s see how they fare when they come up against a team that can defend set-pieces. Eight goals so far and only two from open play. People might want to think about that before getting too carried away. 
 
Hendo played well again, as did Trippier. I want to dislike him because he’s keeping Trent out of the team but it’s hard when he is asked who his favourite Neville is, Gary or Phil, and he says “Tracy”. Fair play. Credit to Sterling too for still managing to look shite even against such hopeless opposition. Takes some doing that, as Panama were so bad that Loftus-Cheek looked like Ruud Gullit. 
 
England against Belgium should be interesting though, particularly as finishing second in the group might be better than winning it. One game I won’t be paying any interest to is Panama against Tunisia though. Doubt if I’ll even bother watching the goals, let alone the highlights. Pair of shit bastards, wasting everybody’s time. Let Phil Neville commentate on that one. 
 
Senegal / Japan was entertaining but the draw didn’t really do Senegal much good because they’ll probably need to beat Colombia now to go through. Sadio opened his account for the tournament with a brilliant finish, cleverly anticipating that the keeper was going to parry a shot and getting himself into the perfect position to place it into the corner with a first time strike with his shin. Great goal. “He does get a bit of luck, Sadio Mané” said Kevin Kilbane. Fucking bitter blueshite bastard. 
 

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Credit where it’s due though, England are doing well but let’s see how they fare when they come up against a team that can defend set-pieces. Eight goals so far and only two from open play. People might want to think about that before getting too carried away.

I heard something the other day, that a massive percentage of goals in World Cups come from set pieces.

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Aye, always loved Argentina. That has only increased since spending plenty of time over there and meeting tons of cool Argies, which it appears the majority of their populace are. Their football gear has always been class, just bought their new track top and it’s tidy.

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 - I’d happily have seen England, Brazil, France, Spain and Portugal all go out in the group stages, but Germany and Argentina are the exceptions to that.- 

Nice work there Kreskin.

 

The heart wants what the heart wants.

 

 

Are you over Paul Walsh going short yet Dave?

 

Maybe one day, far off into the future. Maybe.

 

It's hardly a club of few members. He's fucking shite.

 

He's worse than Cavani and Zlatan. 

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