Premier League Round Up (Mar 17 2018)

[tlw content]

With not too many Premier League games this week we got some extended coverage on MOTD, which should have been be a good thing seeing as how we won 5-0 and Mo scored four goals. I was really looking forward to sitting down to it and enjoying the analysis afterwards, but then I saw Shay Given and Martin Keown. 
 
Not great that, although I do enjoy Keown’s unusual style where he likes to tell us what players are thinking. “He’s thinking, I’m going to cut inside him and get a shot away”. He’s thinking “I’m going to take his legs away before he gets near the penalty area”. He’s thinking “I wonder if the cameras are picking up my new sleeve tattoo”. 
 
When Mo apologised to the Watford keeper after putting four past him, Keown knew what he was thinking. “He’s not sorry at all. He’s ruthless”. I like knowing what footballers are thinking so Martin is a valuable resource. 
 
Shay Given though? I’ll be honest, I don’t really give a fuck what he thinks about anything other than goalkeeping. Still, maybe he’d prove me wrong? Nope. Instead of focusing on Salah’s brilliance and the tactical set up that allowed him to thrive (such as Sadio repeatedly coming in off the wing and linking play), he was bleating on about how difficult it’s going to be for us to keep him. Fucks sake lad, you’re not on MUTV, turn it in you chip pissing on walloper. 
 
If Keown had been analysing me on Saturday night he’d have said “He's thinking: Fucking hell, bring back Jermaine Jenas, all is all forgiven.” 

 

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[Trumo]

"There are no pace goals in Cenk Tosun's armoury so he's already outscored the overhyped pace merchant over at the shite."

                                             - SteveO, GOT regular.

[Josef Svejk]

I saw Given on Match of the Day and immediately anticipated the shit he'd get here. Deservedly.

 

However, I feel obliged to say that Shay is one of the good guys. And there aren't many of them left in professional football.

 

Consider it his spitting moment.

[Trumo]

It's bizarre how so many people in the media all fall over themselves to claim the Premier League as the best in the world, but whenever there's a (mostly unfounded) rumour of interest in a Premier League player from one of Spain's big two, they are immediately geared towards saying the player would want to leave, as though there's nothing worthwhile here to make them want to stay.

[Josef Svejk]

It's bizarre how so many people in the media all fall over themselves to claim the Premier League as the best in the world, but whenever there's a (mostly unfounded) rumour of interest in a Premier League player from one of Spain's big two, they are immediately geared towards saying the player would want to leave, as though there's nothing worthwhile here to make them want to stay.

Ooo... Look at me and my capacity to expose contradictory bullshit!

 

Show off.

[dylstar]

Bet the blueshites are thinking if that Tosun jabroni had been signed by them at the start of the season he would be pushing Salah and Kane for top scorer in the league this season.

[sir roger]

Bet the blueshites are thinking if that Tosun jabroni had been signed by them at the start of the season he would be pushing Salah and Kane for top scorer in the league this season.

 

He'll have been hard pushed to outscore Niasse , never mind Mo.

[Tj hooker]

"There are no pace goals in Cenk Tosun's armoury so he's already outscored the overhyped pace merchant over at the shite."

- SteveO, GOT regular.

Dear God SteveO needs to take a day off

[William_Ulsterman]

I saw Given on Match of the Day and immediately anticipated the shit he'd get here. Deservedly.

 

However, I feel obliged to say that Shay is one of the good guys. And there aren't many of them left in professional football.

 

Consider it his spitting moment.

 

I agree, hes just a big dopey Cultchie from Donegal, i've met him a few times as the wife's uncle was besties with the R.O.I manager and drinking buddies with youth coach a few years back (he's dead now, probably alcohol poisoning from what i could see), and Shay is a decent lad, but like everyone from Donegal he has trouble expressing himself so id cut him a break on this occasion. They are all fucking Man U mad there so there's a huge element of bias of course.

 

You are right about the belfast lads, they would rather drag thier holes across a 100 yards of broken glass than show emotion, and no mercy for a gurn bag. They would probalby be over in the corner kicking the shit out of Gibbs for being such a fanny. Make him wear womens knickers for the next game as a punishment (instead of a kneecapping) or something. #GAWA!