Christian Benteke

[Nolongerathletic]

Nah, you can easily get into the top four by twatting all the shit teams.

Shit teams like us!!

 

 

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[Jairzinho]

Well, quite.

[dennis tooth]

Im sure all the top managers will be frothing their lips:

Work with top talent like mignolet, lovren, allen, lallana, ings, day in day out.

Have a committee of know nothing about football fuckwit brownnoses headed by arch brownnose mike gordon an american hedgefunder, hes like that fella who followed mario around but mike sleeps in john henrys car, these fucks will oversee your transfer activity and make their suggestions.

Try and impress the owners who will never watch your team but will turn up at the end of the season for a review having never watched a fucking match all season with a notepad filled with the scrawled thoughts of fsg advisors who probably never watched a game either but simply filled the book with remarks about your appearance and marketability to the us back home audiences. If teeth performances dont improve you may be sent to that doctor in colorado who fixed redknapps knee to rub them with a goats placenta soaked in bleach.

Meanwhile the squad is packed to the rafters with AM type players or players who do nothing a cone on a skateboard cant do except one of them can at least crack the odd ankle.

And lest we forget the dopey smiling german horsefucker emre can who cant really and the last manager only got the job because he offered to do the job for less wage and promised to reduce the wage bill to tears and get his teeth bleached, oh and hes spent all the money and even tried to leave a gordon brown style note but its been used for toilet roll by sturridge whose been on the shitter for over a year now and youre in the toilet realising theres no bog roll and your about to go into the interview, jurgen klopp is gonna use his bills to wipe his arse and run back down to john lennon trying not to touch his oscar spincter on cloth to take the first plane back to dortmund isnt he?

[stringvest]

Except when it was

 

 

 

that's why I used the word tended instead of saying never, not once did it happen ;)

[El Dangerous]

Sounds like 5th place - maybe a cup run every few years.

 

So you agree it'd be an improvement?

[TheHowieLama]

Improvement yes.

 

Benteke may want CL footy though so alas maybe not enough to keep every Belgian striker on Merseyside.

[El Dangerous]

We'll have developed Origi in to the new Benteke by then and we'll be calling his strike partner Ingsinho. 

 

Even in this highly optimistic fantasy realm i cant see Sturridge being fit.

[TheHowieLama]

Where would we be without him?

 

Currently my favorite Belgian.

[VladimirIlyich]

I don't think he looks like a donkey at all. He looks like a very decent player who is getting no support whatsoever.

While I was being a bit sarcastic,hence the add on regarding the manager,I just feel that any club with ambition wouldnt be signing him. Were City,Chelski,Utd or Arsenal even a little bit interested?

I actually like the look of Origi,but he is unlikely to get game time and if he does will probably also be starved of any service.

[Horus]

Improvement yes.

 

Benteke may want CL footy though so alas maybe not enough to keep every Belgian striker on Merseyside.

iago alas?

[TheHowieLama]

Kevin Mir allas?

[Boss]

Im sure all the top managers will be frothing their lips:

Work with top talent like mignolet, lovren, allen, lallana, ings, day in day out.

Have a committee of know nothing about football fuckwit brownnoses headed by arch brownnose mike gordon an american hedgefunder, hes like that fella who followed mario around but mike sleeps in john henrys car, these fucks will oversee your transfer activity and make their suggestions.

Try and impress the owners who will never watch your team but will turn up at the end of the season for a review having never watched a fucking match all season with a notepad filled with the scrawled thoughts of fsg advisors who probably never watched a game either but simply filled the book with remarks about your appearance and marketability to the us back home audiences. If teeth performances dont improve you may be sent to that doctor in colorado who fixed redknapps knee to rub them with a goats placenta soaked in bleach.

Meanwhile the squad is packed to the rafters with AM type players or players who do nothing a cone on a skateboard cant do except one of them can at least crack the odd ankle.

And lest we forget the dopey smiling german horsefucker emre can who cant really and the last manager only got the job because he offered to do the job for less wage and promised to reduce the wage bill to tears and get his teeth bleached, oh and hes spent all the money and even tried to leave a gordon brown style note but its been used for toilet roll by sturridge whose been on the shitter for over a year now and youre in the toilet realising theres no bog roll and your about to go into the interview, jurgen klopp is gonna use his bills to wipe his arse and run back down to john lennon trying not to touch his oscar spincter on cloth to take the first plane back to dortmund isnt he?

 

Excellent rantage. 

[eeyore]

He's a massive turd and the main reason we started the season so shite. That's all on Rodgers of course

[Dr Nowt]

You don't rate him no?

[eeyore]

You don't rate him no?

I don't rate the way teams play with him.

 

He's capable of moments of brilliance, but generally makes the the team play shit football

[eeyore]

See Belgium and Aston villa

[Hades]

I don't rate the way teams play with him.

 

He's capable of moments of brilliance, but generally makes the the team play shit football

 

Is right. It took Rodgers £32.5M to figure this out.

 

Remember Kenny saying he was "surprised" by how good the £20M shithouse Downing was?

 

Monkeys throwing shit at a dartboard, from top to bottom.

[DirkDiggledinho]

It's going to be like watching a car crash in slow motion. Andy Carroll mark 2 and I'm sure we will all be shocked when he fails to perform and is sold back to Villa for 10M in a year's time.

 

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[JagSquared]

You just know he would be a beast for the likes of chelsea, utd and even Spurs because you know they would actually play a style to suit him. We have no width and leave him isolated. If he gets 10 league goals I'll be pleasantly surprised.

[skend04]

You just know he would be a beast for the likes of chelsea, utd and even Spurs because you know they would actually play a style to suit him. We have no width and leave him isolated. If he gets 10 league goals I'll be pleasantly surprised.

Next thing Rodgers will be blaming ACME for selling him a duff blueprint.

[kalasoma]

So is he carrying an injury? What's going on?

[eeyore]

There is no point playing him in home games at all. If he does have a use, it's in tough away games where we need an outlet to give respite to defence. Even then he's shit.

[Paulie Dangerously]

He's a big lummox

[s(k)aturation]

I actually think he's OK (Not 32.5m OK, but OK - just like Firminho might be OK, but not 28m OK).

 

He has 2 out of the 4 goals we've scored, including a screamer.

 

It's just that he's not suited to any of the 5-and-a-half thousand systems we deploy every 53 minutes.

[dickie mint]

Gary Neville was saying yesterday we never buy the really top players just the ones who are quite not there and might come good which is sadly true.