Christian Benteke

[therevivalist]

Well come aboard, once you're here. Wish you/us all the success cause we need it.

[Dr. J]

Has he been training with Villa? Hope he's fit for Stoke.

[Harry Squatter]

Let's hope he isn't a shithouse, we need some utter bastards playing for us, hope he is a top snide and bullies everyone he plays against.

[Mathewbet1]

Cant wait for him to go into full beast mode and start tearing shit up 

[smilezzz]

Hope the big bastard does us proud this season. His head isn't proportionate to his body though, worrying signs...

[Mathewbet1]

old big ed is back in town

[magicrat]

A vey good signing, let's hope that Rodgers makes it work.

 

I think 90 % will be down to Benteke making it work, Rodgers will do no more than wind him up and let him go

[Russ Atmosphere]

Hope the big bastard does us proud this season. His head isn't proportionate to his body though, worrying signs...

I'm more concerned about Ings, his head's not right. It's not on top of his shoulders when he runs, it's in front of him constantly staring at the ball. Seems to work for him though.

 

[Jose Jones]

His head looks slightly out of proportion (bigger) to the rest of his body. Like Hoggle.

 

Oh my god, we've signed Hoggle.

 

If he isn't very good Rodgers will be made a prince.

 

 

 

 

A prince of the land of stench!

[Pureblood]

Sturridge, Benteke, Ings, Origi > Sturridge, Balotelli, Borini, Lambert

 

We hope.  

[magicrat]

Hope the big bastard does us proud this season. His head isn't proportionate to his body though, worrying signs...

It's worrying that a 2 day medical failed to pick this up 

[Mil-ing Around]

Glad they finally got it done, I'm excited by this signing. Every new clip i see of him seems to show the variety of goals he scores. Free kicks, headers, wrong footing the keeper, clinical finishes, power shots from outside the area. I hope he rips the shit out of many a defence for years to come. 

 

Welcome to the club!!

[Hades]

I despise him already.

[Dicko]

£32.5m!

They actually paid that?

[Redder Lurtz]

Just been reading the thread on villatalk. Bizarre set of people on there. They're mainly wishing him all the best but they don't half hate us. Why?

[Redder Lurtz]

"Me too, but mainly because he's signed for the club I despise the most...and this hasn't helped."

 

The bloke who posted that has Daniel Craig as Bond as his avatar. I'd love to be the one who tells him.

[Pureblood]

Just been reading the thread on villatalk. Bizarre set of people on there. They're mainly wishing him all the best but they don't half hate us. Why?

 

Everyone hates us.  

[Josef Svejk]

Everyone hates us.  

 

The royal "us"?

[Pureblood]

Definitely.

 

Christian Benteke - what are you?

[Kevin D]

Just been reading the thread on villatalk. Bizarre set of people on there. They're mainly wishing him all the best but they don't half hate us. Why?

You're using your free time to seek out and read an Aston Villa forum, and you reckon it's them who are bizarre?

[Mojo]

I reckon he can do really well, but it will be interesting to see if Brendan can get the best out of him when he usually likes short, slight players such as Allen, Borini and Coutinho, of which only the last has been an undisputed success. In a way we need Benteke because of this -- so teams get scared of us rather than thinking they can bully us.

[billypilgrimnz]

Welcome. Hope he goes well. Not sure if he is worth the price, but we certainly are shit negotiators.

 

 

Us: One Benteke, please.

Villa: That'll be 32.5 m pounds.

Us: What? We'll give you 20.

Villa: The price is 32.5 m.

Us: There is no way we are paying that! We're taking our business elsewhere.

 

We go outside and half-heartedly look on craigslist on our phone. We mutter loudly so Villa can hear:

 

Us: Oh yeah, that Lacazette looks alright, doesn't he? Oooh, a Llorente. I've always wanted one of those! Much better than a Benteke....

 

Silence. We walk back in.

 

Us: Yes, one Benteke please.

Villa: That'll be 32.5 m pounds.

Us: Do you take American Express?

[Anubis]

Definitely.

 

Christian Benteke - what are you?

An enigma, wrapped in a riddle, wrapped in a sleightly oversized head.

[aRdja]

He's excited.

 

 

How much are you looking forward to meeting up with your teammates in the final few weeks of pre-season?

 

I'm very excited. I want to meet them and work with them, of course.

 

From his first interview;

 

http://www.liverpoolfc.com/news/latest-news/189481-christian-benteke-the-first-interview

[Jhinge Machha]

have a good feeling about this signing. Looking at all of his goals at villa, i do like the variety of goals he scores. If only we could get a proper fuck off dm in as well