Strangest compliment you've been paid

[Anubis]

After the CL final, on the flight back from Minsk... a 60+ year old man wearing a red top was sat next to me.. was an old small plane, so the seating set up was four seats per row, two on either side of the aisle. He started the convo about football, and whether I was travelling with friends for it etc. Not long after out of the blue he told me dead straight “you have beautiful eyes”... That left me shocked. So I stupidly thanked him. Twenty seconds of silence... then he followed up with, “you must shag a lot of birds with those beautiful eyes”. I told him politely that unfortunately that wasn’t the case as I was a married man. I started feeling a bit uncomfortable, so I set up my iPad and my noise cancelling headphones... not ten seconds later, he followed up again with an even stranger comment... “Well if you get divorced, you could shag a lot of birds with those beautiful eyes.” That was the end of the conversation. I felt really weirded out and honestly a bit violated. I’ve been trying to convince myself that the guy might have had some learning disabilities, but I honestly wouldn’t bet on it.

 

You'll see him again at some point. Just as the rohypnol kicks in. Then those beautiful eyes will end up in one of his collection jars, and your eyeless preserved cadaver will be bummed nightly.

[TheHowieLama]

See Rico's otter comment above

[VladimirIlyich]

After the CL final, on the flight back from Minsk... a 60+ year old man wearing a red top was sat next to me.. was an old small plane, so the seating set up was four seats per row, two on either side of the aisle. He started the convo about football, and whether I was travelling with friends for it etc. Not long after out of the blue he told me dead straight “you have beautiful eyes”... That left me shocked. So I stupidly thanked him. Twenty seconds of silence... then he followed up with, “you must shag a lot of birds with those beautiful eyes”. I told him politely that unfortunately that wasn’t the case as I was a married man. I started feeling a bit uncomfortable, so I set up my iPad and my noise cancelling headphones... not ten seconds later, he followed up again with an even stranger comment... “Well if you get divorced, you could shag a lot of birds with those beautiful eyes.” That was the end of the conversation. I felt really weirded out and honestly a bit violated. I’ve been trying to convince myself that the guy might have had some learning disabilities, but I honestly wouldn’t bet on it.

This post has to go alongside Remmie's Brazilian? hostel 'friend.'

[Total Longo]

"you aren't that bad looking for an old, bald guy" said a 22 year old female colleague in work to me recently. 

 

I was gutted to be referred to as "old" 

 

Only my great-great grandchildren are allowed to refer me as old.   

[stringvest]

"you aren't that bad looking for an old, bald guy" said a 22 year old female colleague in work to me recently. 

 

I was gutted to be referred to as "old" 

 

Only my great-great grandchildren are allowed to refer me as old.   

 

 

welcome to my world.  Except I'm not bald and I'm really quite sprightly now I've lost a few pounds and have a gorgeous woman on my arm.

[Captain Turdseye]

welcome to my world. Except I'm not bald and I'm really quite sprightly now I've lost a few pounds and have a gorgeous woman on my arm.

Careful now. You’ll have Rico following you around the forum saying “Got a girlfriend, have you? Why haven’t you mentioned it?”

[lifetime fan]

Careful now. You’ll have Rico following you around the forum saying “Got a girlfriend, have you? Why haven’t you mentioned it?”

 

Hahahaha

 

Or Rico wanting selfies with him!

[General Dryness]

Or encouraging her to pay her subs.

[nimrod]

"Mr, are you George Best" ?   kids with autograph books on the old car park at Anfield.

[stringvest]

"Mr, are you George Best" ? kids with autograph books on the old car park at Anfield.

That’s because you were lying in the gutter in a pool of your own piss.

[Rico1304]

Careful now. You’ll have Rico following you around the forum saying “Got a girlfriend, have you? Why haven’t you mentioned it?”

I’m just waiting for him to move to Spain.

[tokyojoe]

welcome to my world.  Except I'm not bald and I'm really quite sprightly now I've lost a few pounds and have a gorgeous woman on my arm.

This isn't divorce no. 4 being lined up is it?

[A Red]

Careful now. You’ll have Rico following you around the forum saying “Got a girlfriend, have you? Why haven’t you mentioned it?”

 

To be fair he has a point about these 1 trick bragging bastards, they need to get over themselves. A break in one of my Cornish holiday cottages would probably help.

[Babb'sBurstNad]

Urban Dictionary[/size]

 

Otter[/size]

 

A gay man who is very hairy all over his body, but is smaller in frame and weighs considerably less than a bear.[/size]

 

Sorry BBN.[/size]

Hmm, it's the hairy line I don't care for. I'm well kept in all the right places and have a chest smoother than a baby's backside.

[Furmedge]

I was out with my then girlfriend (now wife) and she was told by some old boy that she reminded him of Claudia Schiffer after a week on the cheese.