Middle Class Generalisation Thread

[Harry Squatter]

9 minutes ago, Elite said:

I have an uncle that thinks he's middle class, he has a nice house but isn't loaded, drives a basic car. I remember going around to his house for a party about 10 years ago, he gets the wine out and makes a point of how "I bet you've never had this." Which equates to a £7 bottle. He then starts bragging about how he only watches Blu-Ray DVDs as though no one else does, he shut up when I told him I have a 4K TV. His whole life is about one-upmanship.

My mate was a high jumper for Great Britain and him and his Mrs went out with this couple. The hadn't met the husband who turned out to be ultra competitive about everything bragging that he was "into sports". Turns out he played in a few badminton tournaments and played golf regularly. Kept going on about it to my mate, then asked him if he was into sports.

 

He shut up once my mate told him that he had represented GB and narrowly missed out on being GB high jumper at the Beijing Olympics. 

[Bjornebye]

11 minutes ago, Doctor Troy said:

My mate was a high jumper for Great Britain and him and his Mrs went out with this couple. The hadn't met the husband who turned out to be ultra competitive about everything bragging that he was "into sports". Turns out he played in a few badminton tournaments and played golf regularly. Kept going on about it to my mate, then asked him if he was into sports.

 

He shut up once my mate told him that he had represented GB and narrowly missed out on being GB high jumper at the Beijing Olympics. 

I bet he was fuming as well. Instead of genuinely being happy for him like most would I bet he was jealous as fuck and tried to find some way of outdoing him. Olympics eh? My goldfish can talk. 

[Rico1304]

14 minutes ago, lifetime fan said:

That’s a catholic school for you. 

Then there's the altar boy who got done for kiddy porn last year. I sat next to him.  To be fair we all saw it coming. 
 

https://www.google.co.uk/amp/s/www.manchestereveningnews.co.uk/news/greater-manchester-news/pharmacist-who-spent-12-years-17241375.amp

[lifetime fan]

2 minutes ago, Rico1304 said:

Then there's the altar boy who got done for kiddy porn last year. I sat next to him.  To be fair we all saw it coming. 
 

https://www.google.co.uk/amp/s/www.manchestereveningnews.co.uk/news/greater-manchester-news/pharmacist-who-spent-12-years-17241375.amp

My flat mate when I was working in NY turned out to be a massive paedo in the Catholic Church over there. 
 

 

https://www.childsexabuse.org/accused/dozia-wilson/

 

http://www.bishop-accountability.org/assign/Wilson_Dozia_J.htm

[Geoff Woade]

45 minutes ago, Bjornebye said:

I bet he was fuming as well. Instead of genuinely being happy for him like most would I bet he was jealous as fuck and tried to find some way of outdoing him. Olympics eh? My goldfish can talk. 

I’d have gone the other way. I wouldn’t have mentioned anything about sport whatsoever in the hope that he didn’t bring up anything about high jumping as it would have set me off ranting about pointless sports such as that.

I still don’t know how Greg Rutherford is carving out any kind of media career. Who gives a shit about someone who’s talent is jumping into a sandpit. I’m aware people could say similar about other sports but I can’t imagine anything worse than hearing him drone on about it over dinner.

[Rico1304]

24 minutes ago, Geoff Woade said:

I’d have gone the other way. I wouldn’t have mentioned anything about sport whatsoever in the hope that he didn’t bring up anything about high jumping as it would have set me off ranting about pointless sports such as that.

I still don’t know how Greg Rutherford is carving out any kind of media career. Who gives a shit about someone who’s talent is jumping into a sandpit. I’m aware people could say similar about other sports but I can’t imagine anything worse than hearing him drone on about it over dinner.

Say nothing and then casually jump over a bus on the way home. 

[RJ Fan club]

10 minutes ago, Rico1304 said:

Say nothing and then casually jump over a bus on the way home. 

I genuinely hope that the evening ended with his mate challenging him to throw his show over the pub roof

[RJ Fan club]

1 hour ago, RJ Fan club said:

I genuinely hope that the evening ended with his mate challenging him to throw his show over the pub roof

Or shoe even.

 

damn autocorrect 

[VladimirIlyich]

1 hour ago, Rico1304 said:

Say nothing and then casually jump over a bus on the way home. 

Sounds like a night out with Duncan Mckenzie.

[VERBAL DIARRHEA]

2 minutes ago, Colonel Kurtz said:

I think the key word in the title of the thread is “generalisation”. This means there will always be exceptions. Maybe start with understanding simple concepts before you move on to the big boys words. This sort of book will help. You will thank me one day.

Will it tell me you’re a cunt? Cunt.

[VERBAL DIARRHEA]

1 minute ago, Colonel Kurtz said:

We’re both cunts, the difference is you’re an illiterate cunt. 

Really? Getting a lot of pleasure from this beauty at the moment. I can heartily recommend it.

[VERBAL DIARRHEA]

6 minutes ago, Colonel Kurtz said:

They’ve spelt colouring wrong. That’s why you’re struggling, you’re reading the wrong books.?

I can’t read pictures? I do however eat crayons.

[Section_31]

Marks and Spencer is the only benchmark of quality. 

 

Space shuttle Challenger explodes on takeoff: "clearly not M&S". 

[Section_31]

They live on 'phase 1' of a new build estate constructed on greenfield land which has brought added pressure to local roads and infrastructure, but strongly oppose 'phase 2', due to impacet on local roads and infrastructure. Opposition includes a public meeting at the new hungry horse pub and a strongly worded statement read out at the planning meeting by the local Karen.

[YorkshireRed]

The Middle Classes are all cunts.

 

I accept this could be a generalisation. 
 

Although, I’m probably one of them. 
 

And I’m definitely a cunt. 

[Rico1304]

3 minutes ago, Section_31 said:

They live on 'phase 1' of a new build estate constructed on greenfield land which has brought added pressure to local roads and infrastructure, but strongly oppose 'phase 2', due to impacet on local roads and infrastructure. Opposition includes a public meeting at the new hungry horse pub and a strongly worded statement read out at the planning meeting by the local Karen.

That’s spot on!  Happening right here now.  I’ve probably mentioned that people here think the right level of development is exactly the level that allowed their house to be built. 

[Section_31]

2 minutes ago, Rico1304 said:

That’s spot on!  Happening right here now.  I’ve probably mentioned that people here think the right level of development is exactly the level that allowed their house to be built. 

Moaning about planning stuff is the most middle class thing there is. There's people on working class estates having quad bikes ridden through their gardens, but middle class people are on the blower to the Samaritans because a farmer is building a single wind turbine two miles away.

 

I don't think a lot of people understand the havoc Jenrick's planning reforms will cause on that score. 

[Captain Howdy]

1 hour ago, Section_31 said:

Moaning about planning stuff is the most middle class thing there is. 

I’ll see your planning permission and raise you centre parcs. It’s like a Waitrose customers convention

[YorkshireRed]

1 minute ago, Captain Howdy said:

I’ll see your planning permission and raise you centre parcs. It’s like a Waitrose customers convention

I see both of these and raise you Youth Hostels.
 

The places are crawling with the backpack wearing, pullover loving, nick nac buying, tupperware loving, rose drinking, deviants who guard the members kitchen like it’s their own ‘safe room’. 

[mattyq]

2 hours ago, Section_31 said:

They live on 'phase 1' of a new build estate constructed on greenfield land which has brought added pressure to local roads and infrastructure, but strongly oppose 'phase 2', due to impacet on local roads and infrastructure. Opposition includes a public meeting at the new hungry horse pub and a strongly worded statement read out at the planning meeting by the local Karen.

Only the lower orders frequent such places

 

[stringvest]

2 hours ago, Section_31 said:

They live on 'phase 1' of a new build estate constructed on greenfield land which has brought added pressure to local roads and infrastructure, but strongly oppose 'phase 2', due to impacet on local roads and infrastructure. Opposition includes a public meeting at the new hungry horse pub and a strongly worded statement read out at the planning meeting by the local Karen.

No way is anyone middle class eating in a Hungry Horse.  It's like saying they'd eat in a Harvester or one of those new steak house places.  Not a chance. They know their station.

[YorkshireRed]

8 minutes ago, stringvest said:

No way is anyone middle class eating in a Hungry Horse.  It's like saying they'd eat in a Harvester or one of those new steak house places.  Not a chance. They know their station.

Back in the day, however, you did used to find them in a Little Chef pretending to find the free lollipop for a clean plate some form witchcraft. 

[Mudface]

2 hours ago, Section_31 said:

They live on 'phase 1' of a new build estate constructed on greenfield land which has brought added pressure to local roads and infrastructure, but strongly oppose 'phase 2', due to impacet on local roads and infrastructure. Opposition includes a public meeting at the new hungry horse pub and a strongly worded statement read out at the planning meeting by the local Karen.

To be fair, what usually happens is the bare minimum of additional infrastructure is added to support the initial phase. By the time phase 2 rolls along, all the phase 1 houses are occupied and it's obvious that the initial infrastructure is woefully inadequate and things are just going to get worse and worse.

 

I had a similar situation on a new estate in East Yorks. It was fine when we first moved in, but within a couple of years, it'd take you 20 minutes just to get out of the estate onto the A63, which would then be gridlocked because of all the extra commuters going to Hull or west to Leeds. Trains were similarly completely rammed, it would take twice as long to see the GP, schools were over-subscribed etc etc. Small beer compared to other people's problems, but when they're adding hundreds more properties without addressing the problems they've already caused then you can see why people get pissed off. Oh, and a lot of the properties were very far from being your stereotypical 'middle class' dwellings. They were two bedroom starter houses and flats- although all the flats got bought up by an umbrella company before they were built and went straight to rent.

 

I did have to laugh at some of the 'early adopters' though. They were in these massive houses next to the school, with views down to the Humber. They didn't realise that phase 2 meant building 3 storey town houses right behind them- no more views and shady gardens...

[Mike D]

 

[sir roger]

4 hours ago, YorkshireRed said:

I see both of these and raise you Youth Hostels.
 

The places are crawling with the backpack wearing, pullover loving, nick nac buying, tupperware loving, rose drinking, deviants who guard the members kitchen like it’s their own ‘safe room’. 

We were contemplating a Lake District trip and went on Bookings.com at the weekend. Was completely flabbergasted to find lovely places for two nights at around £350 , while YHA places for two bunks in a room for 8 and a shared shower block were around the same price.