Little Things That Brighten Your Day

[Captain Willard]

1 hour ago, YorkshireRed said:

Probably shouldn’t have posted that.

I’ve just noticed that the women behind her is wearing a floral calf length dress and a Marks and Spencer’s pink cardigan. Did they both get the same invitation? 

[Bjornebye]

3 hours ago, Captain Willard said:

Lordy. My neighbour doesn’t look like that. She’s 82 and a Jevohah Withess. Can we swap houses ? I’ll Chuck in the allotment to sweeten the deal. 

Nice tactic. Will you visit him in prison? 

[Bruce Spanner]

Started working with a real life Canadian and he says ‘aboot’ with flagrant disregard with how hilarious I find it.

 

‘What you laughing aboot there, Brooce?’ 
 

‘Please stop it, I’m going to laugh up a spleen you all too perfect stereotype’

 

 

[Rico1304]

On 22/08/2021 at 17:31, Captain Willard said:

I’ve just noticed that the women behind her is wearing a floral calf length dress and a Marks and Spencer’s pink cardigan. Did they both get the same invitation? 

M&S will have been slagging her off all day whilst her husband is storing images in his wank bank. 

[Bruce Spanner]

Doing my first solid shit for three day, the sense of relief is palpable. 

[Bjornebye]

49 minutes ago, Bruce Spanner said:

Doing my first solid shit for three day, the sense of relief is palpable. 

Whats the cuisine like over there? 

[Bruce Spanner]

4 minutes ago, Bjornebye said:

Whats the cuisine like over there? 

 

It's alright, nothing to really write home about.

 

Fuck knows what got me, maybe some unwashed veg, your body gets used to it apparently, a bit like 'Delhi belly'.

 

No fun though.

[janmolby]

Anyone seen the Marvel film Shang Chi yet? We're fucking massive.

[Bjornebye]

25 minutes ago, Bruce Spanner said:

 

It's alright, nothing to really write home about.

 

Fuck knows what got me, maybe some unwashed veg, your body gets used to it apparently, a bit like 'Delhi belly'.

 

No fun though.

It's usually the water they use to wash them when you're abroad isn't it? 

 

I had a surf & turf in Egypt once. The fish was shrimp. Woke up the next morning and thought I was going to die. 12 hours of hell, I couldn't even have a sip of water without either projectile vomiting or shitting like a mad man (or both at the same time). Despite people telling me I must have had some salad, it was definitely the shrimp. That was about 2014 and my shits still haven't been the same since. 

[Babb'sBurstNad]

Meeting someone in a service job who's helpful, friendly and for whom it seems a genuine vocation. 

 

Popped on the bus today, and first thing the driver does when he clocks my dog is to helpfully tell me someone else has one down the far end, just in case they don't get on. Then, a foreign student finds her ticket has expired, but he ushers her on anyway as the bus was only half full. At the end I ask if he knows when the bus returns, and he doles out the relevant info. Not a tut, moan or sigh to be heard, just a proper bus driver.

[AngryOfTuebrook]

The intro to Friday I'm In Love.

[Harry's Lad]

Stinking the bog out before someone does it to you.

[YorkshireRed]

Going through a car wash. Takes me back to the excitement I felt as a nipper when my Dad used to take his car through with me in the back.

 

It’s probably fucking my car up and I should really do it myself but it still brightens my day. 

[Bjornebye]

Complimentary tickets to see Nile Rodgers & Chic + The Zutons outside the Liver Building and its sunny 

[sir roger]

2 hours ago, Bjornebye said:

Complimentary tickets to see Nile Rodgers & Chic + The Zutons outside the Liver Building and its sunny 

Good times

[Bruce Spanner]

Thinking 'I'd love a cup of tea, but I'm too lazy' then having the eternal battle with apathy that is the curse of humans. 

 

Wrestles with self for five or so minutes before summoning up the energy to do it, I'm going to fucking do it!

 

Only to look at the table three feet from you, in your direct eye line to see a cup of tea you made about ten minutes back, forgot about and is at perfect drinking temprature.

 

Fuck you, world!

 

Today IS my day.

[Anubis]

 

George Bell, 89, and wife Joyce, 87, went to hospital separately due to ill health. After being discharged they moved to a care home, but Covid restrictions meant they couldn't see each other for 100 days. Heartwarming images captured moment the couple of 66 years were reunited.

[Harry's Lad]

11 minutes ago, Anubis said:

 

George Bell, 89, and wife Joyce, 87, went to hospital separately due to ill health. After being discharged they moved to a care home, but Covid restrictions meant they couldn't see each other for 100 days. Heartwarming images captured moment the couple of 66 years were reunited.

Proper lump in throat stuff. Bless them.

[AngryOfTuebrook]

[Bjornebye]

9 minutes ago, AngryOfTuebrook said:

Hahahahahaha thats superb 

[manwiththestick]

I went to my auntie and uncles house earlier this year, I was speaking to my uncle about going to work for his business, as I'm leaving I go in the kitchen to say goodbye to my aunt, she gives me a hug and passes me a tenner for "a couple of pints and some crisp" 

[Bruce Spanner]

Daily Mail headlines…

 

 

Go, on, just add more.

 

Glorious.

[Dr Nowt]

Had a new lass I’d been speaking to over on the weekend, having told her I’d provide 90 of the most mediocre seconds of her life. Following morning pottering about making myself some breakfast, suddenly remember I’d been wearing my Fitbit. Move over Sting, there’s a new kid in town.

 

As I said to her, ‘Under-promise and over-deliver, baby’.

She’ll not be returning any more calls.

[Bjornebye]

20 minutes ago, Dr Nowt said:

Had a new lass I’d been speaking to over on the weekend, having told her I’d provide 90 of the most mediocre seconds of her life. Following morning pottering about making myself some breakfast, suddenly remember I’d been wearing my Fitbit. Move over Sting, there’s a new kid in town.

 

As I said to her, ‘Under-promise and over-deliver, baby’.

She’ll not be returning any more calls.

Hahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!! She'll remember you, when the west wind moves 

[Ken Robber]

Shift got cancelled this morning, meaning I could get into the gym while it was quiet. 

 

I accepted an offer to go back on the cruise ships from January 1st til July 9th. They're sending me to Long Beach to join a ship that does voyages to Hawaii and Alaska. Gonna take at least 10 photos