Featured: World Cup Round Up - Final

[tlw content]

So that’s that then, all over for another four years and the Germans are worthy World Champions. Good luck to them, they were the best team and they had some of the best individuals too. And as I said in the semi final round up, they’re proper footballers and there’s not a tattoo or shit haircut in sight with those boys.

For a couple of their players it was a bittersweet experience. Sami Khedira injured himself in the warm up and missed the opportunity to play in a World Cup final. That’s got to be hard to take that is. I haven’t decided if I feel sorry for him or not yet, I’m waiting to see if he signs for Arsenal or not. If he does then fuck him. He wasn't in the oh so predictable 'selfies' with the three German Gooners, so there's hope for Sami yet.

His replacement didn’t fare too well either and didn’t seem to be too popular with his team-mates. Christoph Kramer got absolutely clobbered in an accidental clash with Garay. He was almost knocked out and was left in a dazed, crumpled heap. The German players carried on playing for about 30 seconds while the Argies yelled and gesticulated for them to put it out and get the poor lad some treatment. Eventually they did but they couldn’t have seemed any more reluctant about it. Maybe he’s a bit of a Samir Nasri?
 
Or maybe the German players milk injuries so much it's difficult to tell when it's genuine? Take Schweinsteiger for example, who was awesome on the night but seemed to be down injured every couple of minutes. Finally my patience snapped and I ended up yelling "get up you shithouse, there's fuck all wrong with you!!" just as the camera showed blood streaming down his face. Er yeah, sorry Bastian, my bad.

Anyway, ten minutes or so after being steamrollered by Garay, Kramer was subbed. He could barely even walk and had to be helped off by two physios. Why did they leave him on for so long when he was obviously away with the mixer? Some seriously irresponsible antics from the German docs there. Just because Mascherano shook off a concussion in the semis and was the best player on the pitch for the rest of the game doesn’t mean just anybody can. I’m not sure Mascherano is even human, he’s at least part machine. Brilliant again in the final, just a shame most of his team-mates weren’t.

It was a cagey affair early on with Germany hogging the ball but not looking especially threatening. Then Kroos had a brainfart and presented the ball to Higuain who went clean through but dragged a shot well wide. To be fair it’s difficult to bury a chance like that whilst shitting your shorts, as Higuain clearly was. Complete bottle job that, it will probably haunt him for the rest of his life too.

He then finished one quite well but it was ruled out for offside. Strangely, he ran off celebrating without even looking at the lino. That also reflects badly on him for me, as he ran in behind the last defender and was a couple of yards offside, so how the hell did he not know? A complete lack of awareness that. Do they not have offside in Serie A?

 

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[RazorBack]

You meant Christoph Kramer, no? Or is there a pun I didn't get?

[Trumo]

Do they not have offside in Serie A?

 

If they didn't, Inzaghi would have been scoring 2000 goals every year.

[Trumo]

Palacios' lob wasn't 'inches wide', it was a few feet wide. Ronaldo had that shit haircut in 2002 and it didn't do him any harm. He scored twice in the final to win the World Cup.

[The Guest]

I just don't know how people can dislike Lawrenson.  The guy is fucking comedy gold.  I don't think he commentates enough.

[Skidfingers McGonical]

Agree about Mascherano, he was a beast. Would love him back in our midfield.

[Frank Dacey]

Can't go wrong with a John Fogerty song.

[dave u]

Who the fuck is Martin Kramer then?

[dave u]

Palacios' lob wasn't 'inches wide', it was a few feet wide. Ronaldo had that shit haircut in 2002 and it didn't do him any harm. He scored twice in the final to win the World Cup.

 

Looked inches wide on the replay I saw. If it was a few feet wide then it's as bad a miss as Higuain.

 

I meant this haircut, I thought it was France 98. How the fuck can you remember that it wasn't? Are you Rainman or something??

 

[UnwelcomeinPeru]

Who the fuck is Martin Kramer then?

 

Was he in Seinfeld?

[deiseach]

Who the fuck is Martin Kramer then?

Most of a very good golfer.

[Kurt]

There's only one Kramer...