little things that annoy the shit out of you

[sir roger 8,856]

I'm guessing a certain Mr Johnson ?

 

[Rushies tash 2,817]

24 minutes ago, Le Duan said:

I returned to my car after the cinema on switch Island. The driver of the car in front reversed too far and nearly hit my car. The driver was then giving me the finger and shouting. I hadn’t actually started my car. It was stationary. Twat!

Don't get me started on the reactions of other drivers when they've fucked up. Had some cunt drift his van in front of me on a dual carriageway without indicating. When I beeped to let him know I was there and did the indicator motion with my hand, he hung out of his window calling me for all kinds. Our country in microcosm. 

[Bjornebye 33,849]

3 minutes ago, sir roger said:

I'm guessing a certain Mr Johnson ?

 

No, Kirsty Allsopp 

[manwiththestick 5,267]

9 minutes ago, sir roger said:

Calm Down. Lots of people don't like cheese

I heard worse to be fair but I did think it seemed a bit harsh.

[manwiththestick 5,267]

9 minutes ago, Tony Moanero said:

What?!

 

Most dairy products, they just don't agree with me.

[Chairman Meow 4,535]

3 hours ago, Bobby Hundreds said:

That would be annoying.

Certainly liable to put a bit of a downer on your day. 

[Furmedge 2,534]

The dog feigning a shit. He gets in position and nothing comes out, leaving me to do a pretend pick up just so I don't end up on some Facebook ma's news feed about letting my dog shit everywhere because she watched me from 100 yards away not pick anything up.

[Mike D 1,683]

The sound effects used for these speeded up Tik tok or Facebook type videos of someone cooking or generally fucking about with food or doing some woodwork or whatever. Load of fucking shite.

[Preston Red 924]

23 minutes ago, Mike D said:

The sound effects used for these speeded up Tik tok or Facebook type videos of someone cooking or generally fucking about with food or doing some woodwork or whatever. Load of fucking shite.

This, and that fucking stupid "Oh No!" song.

[Captain Turdseye 15,026]

Paper straws. Specifically the ones on these Tesco’s little cartons of orange and apple juice. Doesn’t matter how careful you are, the chance of it poking through the hole properly or it just crumpling into an unusable piece of flimsy rubbish is a genuine 50/50

 

 

 

So much is known about the shitness of paper straws that when we went to the cinema at the weekend, the bloke behind the counter gave us two extra straws each without us even asking. They must be totally pissed off with having to deal with customers that are totally pissed off that their straws have disintegrated before the fucking trailers have finished. 

[Trumo 16,205]

14 hours ago, Furmedge said:

The dog feigning a shit. He gets in position and nothing comes out, leaving me to do a pretend pick up just so I don't end up on some Facebook ma's news feed about letting my dog shit everywhere because she watched me from 100 yards away not pick anything up.

 

Harsh on Lifey that.

[VladimirIlyich 9,642]

17 hours ago, Le Duan said:

Bought a Katsu Chicken baguette. Took it on the train home from London. Bit into it only to find coleslaw on it. I fucking hate coleslaw. I’ll go so far as to say I am brassicamayaphobic. That was it - had to spit the first mouthful out and bin the rest. Was really looking forward to it as well. Who on God’s Green Earth puts fucking coleslaw on a Katsu Chicken baguette? Fumed all the way home - cunts!

Could have been worse. It could have been mayonnaise!

[Tj hooker 2,635]

Trying to get through to the doctors is a fucking nightmare I've been number 3 in the queue for nearly 20 mins now , I tried earlier and the queue was full wtf is that all about .

[Bjornebye 33,849]

31 minutes ago, Tj hooker said:

Trying to get through to the doctors is a fucking nightmare I've been number 3 in the queue for nearly 20 mins now , I tried earlier and the queue was full wtf is that all about .

You ok mate? They've probably fucked off for the night 

[Nelly-Matip 8,503]

I sometimes pop into the Heron Food shop by mine. Not for a big shop, but if I want a few bits like milk and other stuff that they have cheap/a different selection of like pop/biscuits etc. 

 

Anyway, the staff in there have been equipped with Bluetooth headsets so that they can communicate with each other. But, they don’t always do it to discuss work related matters. And, a few of them don’t stop talking on them while they’re serving you. 
 

The bloke was scanning my stuff the other day when he randomly said something like “if they broke into my house, the only thing worth robbing would be my Harry Potter DVDs.”

 

I was thinking what the fuck is he talking about before I clicked on that he was using the headset to chat to another staff member out in the back of the shop. 
 

It pissed me off, thinking about it later. Not only did I think he was a bit mad for striking up a random conversation with me but, after clicking on what was happening, I also thought that it was just very fucking rude to do that while serving customers. 

[Tj hooker 2,635]

18 minutes ago, Bjornebye said:

You ok mate? They've probably fucked off for the night 

I got through after 80 fucking minutes I only wanted to know if they had issued a sick note for this week and surprise surprise they hadn't 

[Tj hooker 2,635]

But yeah @Bjornebye im fine thanks finally over this fucking covid pal 

[Bjornebye 33,849]

2 minutes ago, Tj hooker said:

But yeah @Bjornebye im fine thanks finally over this fucking covid pal 

That's the main thing!  Lazy bastards. 

[Captain Willard 791]

1 night away in Brussels! 1 fucking night and I come back to this 

[Tony Moanero 17,282]

1 hour ago, Captain Willard said:

1 night away in Brussels! 1 fucking night and I come back to this 

You should start dumping your kids’ rubbish in their bedrooms.

[Captain Turdseye 15,026]

6 hours ago, Nelly-Matip said:

I sometimes pop into the Heron Food shop by mine. Not for a big shop, but if I want a few bits like milk and other stuff that they have cheap/a different selection of like pop/biscuits etc. 

 

Anyway, the staff in there have been equipped with Bluetooth headsets so that they can communicate with each other. But, they don’t always do it to discuss work related matters. And, a few of them don’t stop talking on them while they’re serving you. 
 

The bloke was scanning my stuff the other day when he randomly said something like “if they broke into my house, the only thing worth robbing would be my Harry Potter DVDs.”

 

I was thinking what the fuck is he talking about before I clicked on that he was using the headset to chat to another staff member out in the back of the shop. 
 

It pissed me off, thinking about it later. Not only did I think he was a bit mad for striking up a random conversation with me but, after clicking on what was happening, I also thought that it was just very fucking rude to do that while serving customers. 

You should follow him home so you know where he lives and then pay someone to break in and rob every single thing except the Harry Potter DVDs. Just leave the boxset sat there on the floor in the middle of the living room. 

[redinblack 340]

5 hours ago, Captain Willard said:

1 night away in Brussels! 1 fucking night and I come back to this 

Its the lack of respect. Frankly.....I wouldn't stand for it.......

[VladimirIlyich 9,642]

11 hours ago, Captain Willard said:

1 night away in Brussels! 1 fucking night and I come back to this 

I think the lyrics might need some work.

[Trumo 16,205]

7 hours ago, Captain Turdseye said:

You should follow him home so you know where he lives and then pay someone to break in and rob every single thing except the Harry Potter DVDs. Just leave the boxset sat there on the floor in the middle of the living room. 

 

If they're a real cunt, they'll swap the cases too.

[Rico1304 8,864]

I used to get the 7:45 train to Manchester, the station is 7 mins walk from my house and got me into Manchester in enough time for a leisurely 10 min stroll into work.  
 

The new timetable got rid of this train so it’s either 7:13 or 8:20. Too early, or late.  So I’m late.