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People who decline the opportunity to contribute to a polite ripple of applause, instead adopting the persona of a deranged penguin. 

 

Almost always this comes across as said deranged penguin considering themselves more worthy of being looked at than the person, or persons, being celebrated. 

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2 minutes ago, YorkshireRed said:

People who decline the opportunity to contribute to a polite ripple of applause, instead adopting the persona of a deranged penguin. 

 

Almost always this comes across as said deranged penguin considering themselves more worthy of being looked at than the person, or persons, being celebrated. 

Like this shit?

 

 

giphy.gif

 

 

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6 minutes ago, YorkshireRed said:

That is a very good example.

 

Still would. 

I would as well but I get the feeling she'd be a right boring bastard in the bedroom. I'm all for absolute beauty but a leg over with Leanne Battersby after 10 pints and a kebab would be far better than being frightened of creasing Kidmans sheets. Anyway, you were talking about penguins sorry 

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Nigella just made buttered toast on her cooking show. I mean she is insanely lazy anyway, opens packets doesn't peel or chop shit, mashes banana in a big fucking mixer all because she probably doesn't do the washing up but to have your own prime time TV cooking show and you just make toast to the sounds of Sam fucking Cooke or something, you are witnessing a person that's not had to make much fucking effort probably ever for huge success.

 

And yes I would.

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3 minutes ago, Bobby Hundreds said:

Nigella just made buttered toast on her cooking show. I mean she is insanely lazy anyway, opens packets doesn't peel or chop shit, mashes banana in a big fucking mixer all because she probably doesn't do the washing up but to have your own prime time TV cooking show and you just make toast to the sounds of Sam fucking Cooke or something, you are witnessing a person that's not had to make much fucking effort probably ever for huge success.

 

And yes I would.

You owe me a new cock 

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2 minutes ago, Bjornebye said:

You owe me a new cock 

She doesn't use salted butter so she buttered her toast and then sprinkled sea salt on top.

 

                                                                 Skip Ad in 5

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2 hours ago, Bjornebye said:

I would as well but I get the feeling she'd be a right boring bastard in the bedroom. I'm all for absolute beauty but a leg over with Leanne Battersby after 10 pints and a kebab would be far better than being frightened of creasing Kidmans sheets. Anyway, you were talking about penguins sorry 

If I had 10 pints and a kebab, I’d be asleep within seconds. I’m a bit sleepy after a glass of wine these days. Anyway, penguins, where we we ? 

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Gambling ads. Really dissapointed to see Carragher and Souness in the latest ad for Sky betting. The misery that this industry causes in this country is well documented, rips families apart, condemns millions  of kids to a life of poverty and causes countless suicides. There may be as many 2.4 million gambling addicts in the UK.

 

  Why these already highly paid presenters are willing to associate with this industry is a mystery to me. Just greed really,  they don’t care about the social impacts of the industry. 

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11 minutes ago, Captain Willard said:

If I had 10 pints and a kebab, I’d be asleep within seconds. I’m a bit sleepy after a glass of wine these days. Anyway, penguins, where we we ? 

If I had ten pints and a kebab, I’d want another kebab.

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38 minutes ago, Captain Willard said:

If I had 10 pints and a kebab, I’d be asleep within seconds. I’m a bit sleepy after a glass of wine these days. Anyway, penguins, where we we ? 

The mint ones are ace.

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4 hours ago, chrisbonnie said:

dont get me wrong, i love dogs, ive had in the past 12 years. But between picking up shite from a stinky dog and changing a shitty arse, ive had enough. 

 

then there's the burden of finding someone to look after the dog when you go away. they really are a lot of work. 

 

I see where you're coming from. At stages in your childrens life you eventually get some resemblance of normality back, be it getting rid of the buggy, taking the stair gate down. But then you get a puppy and those things are back in  

 

Oh I love her alright- but as you say, its like going back to a house when the kids were toddlers. Although they were far better behaved!

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Just watching Greast British Menu now and Andi Oliver asked one of the contestants how long he would be. He answered with '2 mins, chef'. Im not having Andi Oliver as a chef. I dont care what anyone says. This then reminds me of a previous episode where they asked a Chinese chef something and he answered  'Oui, Chef'.

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7 hours ago, John102 said:

Just watching Greast British Menu now and Andi Oliver asked one of the contestants how long he would be. He answered with '2 mins, chef'. Im not having Andi Oliver as a chef. I dont care what anyone says. This then reminds me of a previous episode where they asked a Chinese chef something and he answered  'Oui, Chef'.

Even that whole "2 minutes chef" 

 

Then they skip over to the judges who are looking at their watches. 

 

As if anyone ever worried about their meal being an 120 second wait in a fucking restaurant before. 

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On 06/03/2022 at 22:06, Bjornebye said:

You haven't read the Cheshire Oaks handbook. 

 

1. Go alone

2. Park in the left hand side car park

3. Go to the Yo Sushi and have a scran and a hot sake. 

4. Leave 

Mine is;

1. Dont Go.

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2 hours ago, chrisbonnie said:

Even that whole "2 minutes chef" 

 

Then they skip over to the judges who are looking at their watches. 

 

As if anyone ever worried about their meal being an 120 second wait in a fucking restaurant before. 

I suppose when you're dealing with the likes of that twat Ramsey that "2 minutes you shouty arrogant cunt!' wouldn't pass muster?

Edited by Creator Supreme
Unnecessary slandering of the Scots

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9 minutes ago, Captain Willard said:

Sold my car on e bay. Bloke says he has to travel 300 miles so wants a reduced price. Post code was in the ad. 

Hope you told him to fuck off

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57 minutes ago, Bjornebye said:

Hope you told him to fuck off

No, I’m desperate to get rid of it before Mrs Willard torches the fucking thing with me in it.  Cost me £2k to limp it through its mot then it broke down on the way home from the garage. He’s welcome to it even with a discount. 

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The supposedly easy open strip of perforated cardboard on the R White's Lemonade Lolly box. Every time I hope it'll work, and every time it rips off halfway. The disappointment is crushing.

 

The lollies are smaller now too. Life is hard.

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10 minutes ago, Babb'sBurstNad said:

The supposedly easy open strip of perforated cardboard on the R White's Lemonade Lolly box. Every time I hope it'll work, and every time it rips off halfway. The disappointment is crushing.

 

The lollies are smaller now too. Life is hard.

Last time I had one of them it felt like it was cutting my mouth to ribbons 

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3 hours ago, Bjornebye said:

Last time I had one of them it felt like it was cutting my mouth to ribbons 

Remember those Sparkle Lemonade ones (I think they also did orangeade)? They were lovely but also felt like death by a thousand sweet, fizzy, icy cuts to the mouth.

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