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little things that annoy the shit out of you


boots123
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5 minutes ago, Babb'sBurstNad said:

Fag ends on the ground everywhere. Put it in the correct bin, take it home, or don't smoke it you dirty cunt.

I used to be a fairly heavy smoker (20-30 a day), and could never understand why some people are so inconsiderate. As well as littering, people smoking while driving or kicking off because they couldn't have a fag at the game used to piss me off too- if you can't go a couple of hours without a fag or wait until there's a service station or rest stop to smoke, then you've got a serious problem.

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On 25/08/2021 at 11:03, Mudface said:

I used to be a fairly heavy smoker (20-30 a day), and could never understand why some people are so inconsiderate. As well as littering, people smoking while driving or kicking off because they couldn't have a fag at the game used to piss me off too- if you can't go a couple of hours without a fag or wait until there's a service station or rest stop to smoke, then you've got a serious problem.

Father in law is the heaviest smoker I've ever known. He literally has to have a smoke at any opportunity. He came round this morning and walked outside to have a smoke after being here less than 30 seconds. 

 

Went on holiday to Turkey with him years ago and as soon as we off the plane he was shaking after going 4 hours without a smoke. When we got on the coach we were the penultimate hotel stop, he got off the coach at each stop to have a ciggy while the driver unloaded the cases for people. 

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11 minutes ago, Doctor Troy said:

Father in law is the heaviest smoker I've ever known. He literally has to have a smoke at any opportunity. He came round this morning and walked outside to have a smoke after being here less than 30 seconds. 

 

Went on holiday to Turkey with him years ago and as soon as we off the plane he was shaking after going 4 hours without a smoke. When we got on the coach we were the penultimate hotel stop, he got off the coach at each stop to have a ciggy while the driver unloaded the cases for people. 

My Father in law was like that. He was a coach driver and used to have a tin bucket that he'd drop his ciggies into when he'd finished them. That was after he'd lit a new one off the old one mind. How the fuck he lived til 75 is beyond me. 

He must have got through 50 or more a day.

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41 minutes ago, Doctor Troy said:

Father in law is the heaviest smoker I've ever known. He literally has to have a smoke at any opportunity. He came round this morning and walked outside to have a smoke after being here less than 30 seconds. 

 

Went on holiday to Turkey with him years ago and as soon as we off the plane he was shaking after going 4 hours without a smoke. When we got on the coach we were the penultimate hotel stop, he got off the coach at each stop to have a ciggy while the driver unloaded the cases for people. 

Sounds like my brother- he used to get up in the middle of the night to have a fag. 

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1 hour ago, Carvalho Diablo said:

In TV and movies when someone dies and someone else gently brushes a hand over the dead person's face to close their eyelids.

 

Fuck off, have you ever tried to do that? I have and needless to say, it doesn't fucking work.

Whenever someone does that during an overly sentimental death scene, I like to make a "parp" sound, and pretend the deceased has just voided their bowels.

 

I'm easily amused.

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1 hour ago, Babb'sBurstNad said:

Whenever someone does that during an overly sentimental death scene, I like to make a "parp" sound, and pretend the deceased has just voided their bowels.

 

I'm easily amused.

Was on a video conference call when I read this. Well played sir!

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I'd forgot this even existed but taking off a long sleeve shirt and the first hand coming out of the arm no problem but the second one needing a yank where you nearly pop the button. Same size shirt, same size hand holes, same buttons done up and unless you're injured, the same sized hand. What's going on here? I'm too lazy to unbutton the buttons on the wrists when I get in from work. Utter bastards. 

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5 minutes ago, Arniepie said:

Realising you are nearly 50 when you are clocking the fit 20 somethings in the office.

 

 

Disclaimer.. this may not be little but is doesmt half annoy you.

Not that I'd stand I chance of i was in my 20s bit still.

Bollocks mate, shoot your shot. 

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4 hours ago, Bjornebye said:

I'd forgot this even existed but taking off a long sleeve shirt and the first hand coming out of the arm no problem but the second one needing a yank where you nearly pop the button. Same size shirt, same size hand holes, same buttons done up and unless you're injured, the same sized hand. What's going on here? I'm too lazy to unbutton the buttons on the wrists when I get in from work. Utter bastards. 

Wanking hand is obviously more muscular.

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16 hours ago, Bjornebye said:

I'd forgot this even existed but taking off a long sleeve shirt and the first hand coming out of the arm no problem but the second one needing a yank where you nearly pop the button. Same size shirt, same size hand holes, same buttons done up and unless you're injured, the same sized hand. What's going on here? I'm too lazy to unbutton the buttons on the wrists when I get in from work. Utter bastards. 

Take your watch off

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Supposed Venn diagram jokes, which don't actually work as Venn diagrams.

 

This is a typical example. "Asks the same questions", "Frightens students" and "Will be around for years to come" are properties of the things shown in the groups and should be written as labels outside each circle; but this would expose the fact that the lazy bastards haven't bothered to come up with any examples of something that belongs in just one group.

Cunts.

 

IMG_20210905_144232.jpg

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Use of language is becoming increasingly infuriating to me. 
 

People talking about something being “a vibe”

 

Fucking women and their insistence on tagging “Sunday Funday” whenever they’re doing anything except sat on their fat fucking arses all day. 
 

Likewise with the term OutOut to describe one of their shitty fucking nights out where they drink Prosecco and cackle at each other. 

 

 

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5 minutes ago, Chris said:

Use of language is becoming increasingly infuriating to me. 
 

People talking about something being “a vibe”

 

Fucking women and their insistence on tagging “Sunday Funday” whenever they’re doing anything except sat on their fat fucking arses all day. 
 

Likewise with the term OutOut to describe one of their shitty fucking nights out where they drink Prosecco and cackle at each other. 

 

 

"we move" wait till you hear that fucker 

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