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little things that annoy the shit out of you

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On 02/05/2021 at 00:26, Mook said:

Aye, it does seem pointless when they're still taking cash. I've not used cash for over a year tbh apart from £50 my missus gave me the other week.

 

On 02/05/2021 at 00:31, Bjornebye said:

What for.... come on 

Pick up some heroin for the wains.

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1 hour ago, General Dryness said:

 

Pick up some heroin for the wains.

They're called bairns on this side of the country.

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Probably been mentioned, possibly by me, but people who brag about never watching an episode of something. 

 

You're not some crazy maverick for never watching an episode of friends. We all have things we like and thinks we don't like, you cunt. 

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People who ignore traffic lights, which seems to be on the increase. Amber? I'll floor it and accelerate through. Just turning to red? I'll hammer through it like Mad Max.

 

Thing is, you usually end up pulling behind them at the next set of lights. 

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3 hours ago, John102 said:

Probably been mentioned, possibly by me, but people who brag about never watching an episode of something. 

 

You're not some crazy maverick for never watching an episode of friends. We all have things we like and thinks we don't like, you cunt. 

They are usually lying as well. 

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4 hours ago, johnsusername said:

People who ignore traffic lights, which seems to be on the increase. Amber? I'll floor it and accelerate through. Just turning to red? I'll hammer through it like Mad Max.

 

Thing is, you usually end up pulling behind them at the next set of lights. 

In south london, amber means speed up and red is proceed with caution. 

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Mrs Kurtz drove my car today which is tiptronic so can be driven as an automtic or a manual. She bought it back saying it was making a lot of noise but wouldn't go above 30. She was of course driving it around in manual and 1st gear all the way home. She's used about £30 of petrol driving 5 miles.  

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On 03/05/2021 at 15:32, VladimirIlyich said:

I love the way you've printed it all in capital letters too. 

Better yet bring back the birch, one guy who had it said, after 6 strokes you will never ever return for another dose.

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13 hours ago, Colonel Kurtz said:

Mrs Kurtz drove my car today which is tiptronic so can be driven as an automtic or a manual. She bought it back saying it was making a lot of noise but wouldn't go above 30. She was of course driving it around in manual and 1st gear all the way home. She's used about £30 of petrol driving 5 miles.  

She hates you. I’d be on the look out for wife no.12 if I was you. 

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Colds that won't fuck off. Had this bastard for nearly a week now and it has been here way past it's welcome.

 

Typical that my first days off from shift I get nailed with this after having the gravelly throat through the last two days at work. Cunt of a thing.

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18 hours ago, John102 said:

Probably been mentioned, possibly by me, but people who brag about never watching an episode of something. 

 

You're not some crazy maverick for never watching an episode of friends. We all have things we like and thinks we don't like, you cunt. 

Yeah it's the same about people who brag about not using Facebook, like I am supposed to look at them in some kind of awe that they manage to survive without this in a modern technological world. Or even better - they do a facebook cull, oooh such a badass.

 

I'd tweet about this of course but *takes off sunglasses* I don't use twitter.

 

 

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There is lots that annoys me recently.

 

The thing that i noticed today is when people in their 40's/50's comment on clubbing videos and moan about kids having their phones out or how its not as good as it was in their day. These might all be valid points, but who cares.

 

Its the kids turn to rave now. Let them do it however they want. We all had our time, let them have theirs. 

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And another thing too. People who say things like 'I was born in the wrong decade'. You like a bit of doo wop music do you and now you think you want to live in the 1950's. Fuck off will you. Winds me up if this comes from teenagers in particular.

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Hayfever can fuck right off. I’d never had it, then last year i’m sneezing like a twat and constantly rubbing my eyes. i’m a middle aged bloke, i’m not supposed to just develop a fucking allergy to tree pollen. 

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10 hours ago, markcd said:

Hayfever can fuck right off. I’d never had it, then last year i’m sneezing like a twat and constantly rubbing my eyes. i’m a middle aged bloke, i’m not supposed to just develop a fucking allergy to tree pollen. 

Yeah I started getting it a few years back. It's a bastard. Weird how it just comes on when you've never had it?! 

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Plastic dustbin liners that dont fit over the lip of the bin. To make it fit you have to tear a bit down the seam which inevitably splits too far. 

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Just now, Harry's Lad said:

Doctors receptionists. Enough said.

"Do you have experience in public relations and administrative duties?"

 

"No."

 

"Not to worry. Are you a complete cunt?"

 

"Yes."

 

"Wonderful! When can you start?"

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10 minutes ago, Elite said:

"Do you have experience in public relations and administrative duties?"

 

"No."

 

"Not to worry. Are you a complete cunt?"

 

"Yes."

 

"Wonderful! When can you start?"

They certainly seem to be the necessary qualifications.

They walk around wearing white coats in our practice being all officious. 

Fucking delusions of grandeur.

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Been out leafleting for weeks for Mrs Kurtz in the local election. Delivered1000s of the fucking things now but to named targeted addresses so it’s not every house. Things I have learned to hate;

 

1. Stiff letterboxes with a draft lining so thick that you cant get a letter through. What is the fucking point ? 

 

2. Low level letterboxes at the bottom of the door.

 

3. Houses with no letterbox. There are quite of few of these surprisingly 
 

4. Blocks of flats that you can’t get into to deliver. 
 

5. Houses that don’t have a number just a poncey name. 
 

6. Houses with a long flight of slippery steps.

 

7. Dogs

 

8. Houses with long drives 

 

9. Streets with no names 

 

10. Rude cunts who think they have a right to insult you just becuase you are delivering a leaflet for a political party they don’t like. 

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People who turn up late on conference calls so everybody else has to make awkward small talk whilst waiting, then give up and start the call then start again and repeat everything becuase the fucker turns up 5 minutes in. 

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