little things that annoy the shit out of you

[Remmie]

Is there anything as consistently unfunny as political humour?

 

Take this Brexit "sketch":

 

https://www.facebook.com/bbcthree/videos/2168932530015034/

 

I agree with sentiment behind it but it's about as funny as Michael McIntyre at an artificial lawn convention.

[Captain Turdseye]

1 hour ago, Remmie said:

Is there anything as consistently unfunny as political humour?

 

https://www.liverpoolway.co.uk/index.php?/profile/54122-bjornebye/

[Dougie Do'ins]

Fuck off. Just fuck off. And when you've fucked off, get a wash, a job and then fuck off again.

 

Clapping replaced with jazz hands over fears noise could trigger anxiety among students

 

https://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2018/10/02/clapping-replaced-jazz-hands-student-union-amid-fears-noise/

 

 

[Bobby Hundreds]

I've got a fitted kitchen there's a fitted dishwasher but no where to put a tumble dryer. Now the shitty weather is upon us having to dry clothes indoors is a ball ache the clothes dry with a smell of damp it's doing my head in.

[magicrat]

10 minutes ago, Bobby Hundreds said:

I've got a fitted kitchen there's a fitted dishwasher but no where to put a tumble dryer. Now the shitty weather is upon us having to dry clothes indoors is a ball ache the clothes dry with a smell of damp it's doing my head in.

Kitchen appliance hell 

[Dougie Do'ins]

16 minutes ago, Bobby Hundreds said:

I've got a fitted kitchen there's a fitted dishwasher but no where to put a tumble dryer. Now the shitty weather is upon us having to dry clothes indoors is a ball ache the clothes dry with a smell of damp it's doing my head in.

Bin the dishwasher off and do the dishes in the sink.

[Bjornebye]

4 minutes ago, Dougie Do'ins said:

Bin the dishwasher off and do the dishes in the sink.

Where will he wank?

[The Golden Eel]

When you're sitting at a junction and a big land rover-type car pulls up beside you to turn the other way and, as it sits there waiting to get out, you can no longer see the road to see whether you can pull out. 

[VERBAL DIARRHEA]

1 hour ago, Bobby Hundreds said:

I've got a fitted kitchen there's a fitted dishwasher but no where to put a tumble dryer. Now the shitty weather is upon us having to dry clothes indoors is a ball ache the clothes dry with a smell of damp it's doing my head in.

Wash your clothes in the dishwasher and gib the washing machine for a dryer.

Alternatively lose the dishwasher as it’s unnecessary unless you run a business and they’re shit anyway. Buy a washer dryer, they’re shitter than dishwashers.

[Dougie Do'ins]

2 hours ago, Dougie Do'ins said:

Bin the dishwasher off and do the dishes in the sink.

 

1 hour ago, VERBAL DIARRHEA said:

Wash your clothes in the dishwasher and gib the washing machine for a dryer.

Alternatively lose the dishwasher as it’s unnecessary unless you run a business and they’re shit anyway. Buy a washer dryer, they’re shitter than dishwashers.

So in short. Do the fuckin dishes yourself. 

[Bobby Hundreds]

10 hours ago, Dougie Do'ins said:

Bin the dishwasher off and do the dishes in the sink.

Fuck that I'll stick with damp.

[sir roger]

Did somebody say dishwashers are shit ?

 

I thought I’d seen everything on here , but that’s me taught.

[moof]

22 hours ago, Dougie Do'ins said:

Fuck off. Just fuck off. And when you've fucked off, get a wash, a job and then fuck off again.

 

Clapping replaced with jazz hands over fears noise could trigger anxiety among students

 

https://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2018/10/02/clapping-replaced-jazz-hands-student-union-amid-fears-noise/

 

 

That’s a brilliant idea. I love it

[Dr Arthur De Sabre]

On 10/4/2018 at 2:40 AM, Bobby Hundreds said:

I've got a fitted kitchen there's a fitted dishwasher but no where to put a tumble dryer. Now the shitty weather is upon us having to dry clothes indoors is a ball ache the clothes dry with a smell of damp it's doing my head in.

Make a drying room outside with a gazebo. Get one with telescopic legs that you can raise and lower.

ours cost about £60, plus no leccy bill, even if you replace every year it’s cheaper than a drier.

[Mook]

My Boss has been going out our office over the hallway to the kitchen, just leaving our door open, 'been going on for weeks & it does my fucking head in. This morning she went across & I got up & shut the door behind her, she comes back in, "Did you shut that door behind me?"

 

Me, "Yes, a client could call & anyone outside would hear me talking about confidential stuff."

Her, "I was only out for two seconds."

 

How the fuck am I meant to know that you fat bastard?

 

[Melchett]

8 minutes ago, Mook said:

My Boss has been going out our office over the hallway to the kitchen, just leaving our door open, 'been going on for weeks & it does my fucking head in. This morning she went across & I got up & shut the door behind her, she comes back in, "Did you shut that door behind me?"

 

Me, "Yes, a client could call & anyone outside would hear me talking about confidential stuff."

Her, "I was only out for two seconds."

 

How the fuck am I meant to know that you fat bastard?

 

Secret Santa her a flask, then you can get your work done more better.

[Mook]

If I partook in Secret Santa she would be getting a load of fucking cyanide in December.

[General Dryness]

31 minutes ago, Mook said:

If I partook in Secret Santa she would be getting me wearing fuck all but a ribbon round my tool in December.

Steady lad, the forum isn't ready for this kind of honesty. 

[stringvest]

On 10/3/2018 at 5:57 PM, Dougie Do'ins said:

Bin the dishwasher off and do the dishes in the sink.

No way.  She's good with the kids and she does all his ironing.

[Dougie Do'ins]

Barbers. Next time I'm in to get what's left of my hair cut, just get on and do your fucking job instead of going on and on about fucking shite I'm not interested in. 20 fucking minutes for something for something that should take no more than five at a stretch.

[Elite]

16 minutes ago, Dougie Do'ins said:

Barbers. Next time I'm in to get what's left of my hair cut, just get on and do your fucking job instead of going on and on about fucking shite I'm not interested in. 20 fucking minutes for something for something that should take no more than five at a stretch.

Go to a Turkish barbers they can only say 'Boss'.

[SammyAftershave]

Or save yourself a load of money and unnecessary earache and just leave it scruffy

[Redder Lurtz]

The fact that it seems to be a given that anyone who's been in the armed forces is some kind of "hero" or someone to admire and look up to. It's not particularly any kind of an achievement to have left school with fuck all qualifications, signed up for a minimum term in the army as cannon fodder because there's nothing else realistically available to do, then to leave again after said minimum term and end up in a minimum wage job, getting pissed and shoving coke up your nostrils on a weekend whilst spouting off about all the ace times you had with the lads in Germany or Cyprus or wherever.

 

Don't get me wrong, I've the highest admiration for those who sign up to the forces and put the effort in to their career, probably more than someone who signs up to be an accountant or whatever. I'm just not held in the type of awe society seems to expect I should be of some neanderthal meathead with nothing between the ears who did 3 years in the infantry who'll brag about "when I was in the army" until the day he dies.

[ZonkoVille77]

Attention seeking cunts. Especially on the internet. You know who you are, you cunt. 

[Trumo]

U Ok hun? xx