Jump to content
  • Sign up for free and receive a month's subscription

    You are viewing this page as a guest. That means you are either a member who has not logged in, or you have not yet registered with us. Signing up for an account only takes a minute and it means you will no longer see this annoying box! It will also allow you to get involved with our friendly(ish!) community and take part in the discussions on our forums. And because we're feeling generous, if you sign up for a free account we will give you a month's free trial access to our subscriber only content with no obligation to commit. Register an account and then send a private message to @dave u and he'll hook you up with a subscription.

little things that annoy the shit out of you


boots123
 Share

Recommended Posts

Cooking sausages.

Granted i am fucking ace at it, as you all will testify. Esp with beans.

I can never decide if they are done right. Its that bendy bit. I end up coking just two sides. Admittedly perfect but it pisses me off.

Steak. Chicken New Borns no problem. Sausages, which are probably my favorite food, fuck off.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Old men in the gym. They always look at your bollocks when you're naked, and always spread out on any seating area in the changing room so you can't sit, chatting shit to another old cunt on the other side of the changing room.

Add to that impossibly insecure gym prefect twats in their mid-late twenties, who spend 3 hours there at a time, scrutinise everything everyone else does, are desperate to make eye contact with anyone they can talk at about their training and use mate twice a sentence every sentence.

 

I want to get in and get away as quickly as possible, fuck off sitting on a weights machine for an hour.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Cooking sausages.

Granted i am fucking ace at it, as you all will testify. Esp with beans.

I can never decide if they are done right. Its that bendy bit. I end up coking just two sides. Admittedly perfect but it pisses me off.

Steak. Chicken New Borns no problem. Sausages, which are probably my favorite food, fuck off.

You’re obviously not cooking them in the oven, which brings into question whether you have any idea what you’re doing.

 

“Perfect” sausages do not have bits of skin that haven’t crisped up.

  • Downvote 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Add to that impossibly insecure gym prefect twats in their mid-late twenties, who spend 3 hours there at a time, scrutinise everything everyone else does, are desperate to make eye contact with anyone they can talk at about their training and use mate twice a sentence every sentence.

 

I want to get in and get away as quickly as possible, fuck off sitting on a weights machine for an hour.

Stick your headphones on and turn the music on before you enter the gym and don't remove them until you've left. Works for me every time. I'm sure they call me the 'fat old bastard who never talks to anybody.' I don't look at anybody's bollocks either,but do cast admiring glances at the nice young ladies in their tight lycra gear while pretending to be looking elsewhere.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Oven cooked sausages on a fry-up? What is this lunacy?!

Stop taking the word fry up so literally and your life will improve. Start to say “cooked breakfast” maybe, to expand your horizons.

 

Fry your black pudding and mushrooms, oven cook your bacon, sausages and tomatoes, do you eggs however you like them best, and shove some toast on the side, and you’re away.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Stop taking the word fry up so literally and your life will improve. Start to say “cooked breakfast” maybe, to expand your horizons.

 

Fry your black pudding and mushrooms, oven cook your bacon, sausages and tomatoes, do you eggs however you like them best, and shove some toast on the side, and you’re away.

I spent years grilling bacon, sausages and tomatoes, as I’d convinced myself less grease was better. One day, I decided to fry them, for a change, and have never looked back. You need a bit of grease when you have a cooked breakfast.

  • Upvote 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

When you buy an energy drink in Tesco or sainsbury's at the self checkout and you have to wait ages for someone to put a code in after an age check.

 

Didn't even know this was a thing. 

 

You sure you didn't just make this up?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

 Share


×
×
  • Create New...