little things that annoy the shit out of you

[Alan Sex]

The missus will doubtless join in after I've had a tantrum and threatened divorce.

The evening might put a strain on your marriage, but after the thing is built I'm sure you'll bounce back.

[General Dryness]

The evening might put a strain on your marriage, but after the thing is built I'm sure you'll bounce back.

Or she might tell me to take a running jump.

[Bjornebye]

I know its an obscure ballet by a composer no-one has ever heard of, but its the 'Nutcracker' by Tchaikovsky, not the bloody Home Alone theme!

Yep. Just like when people hear you'll never walk alone they all go "ooh that's that lovely song from carousel"

 

You've done me there though

 

 

Anyway. The b c sport gossip pages. At the bottom.they always go "and finally..." then come out with a load more stories. What's the sodding point

Exams that have questions actually designed to trip you up. Not content with having you research, retain and answer something you've only just learnt, they want to fuck you over and call you a loser.

 

Yes, I have an exam this afternoon. I'm gonna fail big time. Sat there in a revision group and Mr Fucking Know It All is shouting out all the answers and I've now reverted to putting bets on, on my phone.

[Bjornebye]

Don't know why I've managed to quote furmedge there as well

[Remmie]

Yep. Just like when people hear you'll never walk alone they all go "ooh that's that lovely song from carousel"

 

You've done me there though

 

 

Anyway. The b c sport gossip pages. At the bottom.they always go "and finally..." then come out with a load more stories. What's the sodding point

 

I find that "and finally" heading quite useful as a signpost that all subsequent stories are incredibly dull. Some Wigan douchebag playing Xbox with his brother and decided to Instagram it. Thank fuck I know that

[Alan Sex]

It's bloody cold today. I don't like it when it's dangerous to go outside.

 

[Guest Pistonbroke]

Looking after a dog for friends whilst they are in Bulgaria for the next 11 days and it's farting all the time and fucking stinks. Our dog keeps fucking off into the other living room to get away from her. 

[VladimirIlyich]

Looking after a dog for friends whilst they are in Bulgaria for the next 11 days and it's farting all the time and fucking stinks. Our dog keeps fucking off into the other living room to get away from her. 

Maybe its actually your dog doing it and its leaving the friends dog to take the blame?

[Guest Pistonbroke]

Maybe its actually your dog doing it and its leaving the friends dog to take the blame?

 

Nope, the smell returns soon after our dog has scarpered. It's an Italian Spinone, not sure if that is something that breed is renowned for or if it is down to missing them type thing. Hopefully her guts will be sorted soon as it really is annoying. 

[Anny Road]

Wife and children who think it is on putting half full cans of coke in the waste paper bins in their room. Not only do they never empty the fucking things and would rather balanced stuff on top but then they moan when upon lifting the bin me and the carpet get covered in juice. 

[General Dryness]

Wife and children who think it is on putting half full cans of coke in the waste paper bins in their room. Not only do they never empty the fucking things and would rather balanced stuff on top but then they moan when upon lifting the bin me and the carpet get covered in juice. 

 

Alan will address this at some stage.

[Mook]

How do you block phone numbers on your mobile?

 

I'm getting about three 'accident/compensation' calls a day from 0151, 0141, 0131 & 0161 numbers as well as mobile numbers & I have a Samsung phone.

 

If I catch up with the cunts, it won't be me having a fucking accident.

[Dougie Do'ins]

How do you block phone numbers on your mobile?

 

I'm getting about three 'accident/compensation' calls a day from 0151, 0141, 0131 & 0161 numbers as well as mobile numbers & I have a Samsung phone.

 

If I catch up with the cunts, it won't be me having a fucking accident.

Go into your phone log and select the number you want to bar. Top right there's a 'more' option. Click on that and you should get the option to block the number. If you go into settings you can opt to block unknown numbers but that could prevent a legitimate call getting through.

[Mook]

Cheers, Dougie - you're a legend.

[cloggypop]

Have a look at Truecaller, Mook. Could be exactly what you want.

[RedKnight]

I just tell them the person they're looking for is dead, that usually stops the calls.

[Furmedge]

Have a look at Truecaller, Mook. Could be exactly what you want.

Another vote for truecaller here. They show the number and how many times its been reported as spam before you answer it.

[Bobby Hundreds]

Going to work when the missus is off. The smugness is tangible.

[Scottish Steve]

When you take a parcel in for one of your neighbours & even tho the delivery boy has put a card thru their door they can't be arsed coming round & expect you to lug it round to theirs. Fuck off you lazy, self-entitled piss-takers

[Guest Pistonbroke]

When you take a parcel in for one of your neighbours & even tho the delivery boy has put a card thru their door they can't be arsed coming round & expect you to lug it round to theirs. Fuck off you lazy, self-entitled piss-takers

 

We took one in this year for a neighbour who actually lives about 3 doors down, fuck knows why they asked us, probably have some sort of list from Amazon of trusted mugs. This bloke is actually Scottish and a truck driver although apart from the  odd hello we haven't had a lot to do with each other. 2 fucking months we had the package for, as well as the card which DHL had obviously left him I must have attempted to contact him about 10 fucking times and even left a note of my own for him. Eventually I just contacted Amazon, printed off the return forms they sent me via an e-mail and sent the fucking package back. No lies, the very next day he rang our doorbell and whinged about me returning his package to Amazon, I just laughed and told him to fuck off. Cheeky bastard. 

[Champ]

Bloody women drivers who drive as if there's not another soul on the road

[SasaS]

All those scenes now with people urinating in almost every American TV drama which are supposed to persuade me they are oh so gritty. It really pisses me off.

[Rick Sanchez C-137]

Women

 

I hear ya, Champ.

[skend04]

Splitting eggs for a custard recipe on Saturday Kitchen, John Tories has just wasted 6 egg whites. Cunt!

[VladimirIlyich]

All those scenes now with people urinating in almost every American TV drama which are supposed to persuade me they are oh so gritty. It really pisses me off.

I saw what you did there. They always seem to piss but nobody ever needs a shite,especially first thing in the morning.