Captions for new issue

[Jairzinho]

 

Christ sake, I only asked him if he liked the idea of partnering Victor Anichebe.

[Barney_Rubble]

That's me and my missus on our European Night at El Madrigal - magnificent, isn't it?

[Strontium]

Martinez finds strange gold ring in Everton home dressing room

 

 

"It came to me, my own, my love... my... preciousssss."

[Strontium]

Moyes struggles to impose his authority at Old Trafford

 

 

Look, your man Sir Alex might have won 13 league titles and 2 European Cups, but he disnae have a mural at Taffs Tavern does he?

[Babb'sBurstNad]

 

Suarez prepares for life at Arsenal by lifting non existant trophy.

[Dante]

 

 

BR: E-bay, Eye-b, E-Bee, Eyeb? How the fuck do you say it again?

[Stickman]

 

 

Moysie introduces RVP to another new signing......

[Carvalho Diablo]

Mourinho in race row.

 

[Carvalho Diablo]

"It's a merkin."

 

[House of Dirk]

 

'See that la, Leighton gave us a lift here like'

[Russ Atmosphere]

Everytime I click my fingers... John Cross writes another piece of Arsenal propaganda in the Mirror.

 

[Russ Atmosphere]

No I'm sorry I can't promise you we'll win a single trophy whilst I'm the manager but we'll definitely finish above Liverpool at least once.

 

[Jack the Sipper]

Martinez discovers the truth of the old Evertonian claim that you can 'smell the atmosphere' at Goodison Park

[Trumo]

 

MM: Enough's enough. You got us to wear the shorts, but the gloves are a step too far.

 

 

Mourinho wanted to make his press conferences a lot more cryptic and interesting.

 

 

JM: (signing) We're putting in a cheeky bid for Bale.

 

 

Suarez's teammates pranked him in order to prevent him from signing any contracts elsewhere.

 

 

LS: Damn, I can't write left handed.

[Babb'sBurstNad]

 

Either the drains have gone or we're signing Darren Fletcher!

[The Golden Eel]

Old guy: OK, so it's Rimmer next, then Lister, then Kryten.

[Simbo]

 

Come on, Fernando....it would be the closest you'll ever get to playing for Liverpool again.

[Fowlersleftfoot]

 

"........then Roberto said that they were top four material"

[Trumo]

Van Persie was sceptical about Moyes' tactical plans.

 

 

DM: Robin, I need you to run the channels and also look for the knock downs.

 

 

DM: (thinking) I thought these Dutch were tactically very receptive to new ideas.

 

 

 

Old bloke: Why does that fella have rose bearers walking in front of him?

[Stu Monty]

 

SG: We're going to really miss him for those six games this season"

MH: *It'll be more than that if I get to ref you, trust me*

 

 

 

 

 

Colin Pascoe: Fashion Pioneer

 

CP: *I knew they'd all come round to the shorts look*

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Three week of training and Martinez still didn't understand how Hibbert was a professional footballer

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Martinez drops tantalising hints to Everton Fans

 

Fan: "Who are we signing then Roberto?"

RM: "How does the greatest African striker of his generation sound? The big Ivorian legend?"

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Awkward moment at Goodison as reality hits home

RM: "...so I said 'I've heard I'll be buying players with buttons and IOUs!"

BK: "..and I said 'I've heard you're after Kone and Alcaraz so we'll be fine with buttons won't we!"

 

 

 

RM & BK: *I've made a huge mistake*

[Guest LFD]

 

Dave Usher gets some graphics drawn up while he considers re branding TLW.

[Stu Monty]

Wellbeck pranks from sponsors on Asian tour

 

"Haha, you're Danny Wellbeck; this guy, always with the ironic MoM jokes!"

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

As Rooney turns up for the first session of Pre-Season Moyes sees he has his work cut out

[Stu Monty]

Wilshire not convinced by Arsenal's ambition

 

 

SG: "He texted me to say he's well depressed this summer. I said, you think this is grim; wait till next summer in Rio!"

[Russ Atmosphere]

I'm positive Sir Alex said to me the role was manager but aye this does make more sense the more I think about it.

 

[Stu Monty]

Rare appearance from Utd Starlet hints as to why Phil swerved punditry

 

 

PN: "Janjuzz....Zanjujaj....Najuzaz....ah bollocks; the fuckin' Belgian one!"