Definitely true things you've heard about Footballers

[Megadrive Man]

Danny Drinkwater refuses to eat or drink in public for fear of somebody taking a photo of him and writing a witty caption based around his surname. 

[VERBAL DIARRHEA]

Jordan Henderson once entered a Jordan Henderson lookalike completion and finish 4th.

Which is not too bad except Flava Flav won it.

 

 

Seamus Coleman is allergic to mayonnaise but likes mustard.

 

Dirk Kuyt washes his hair in Lemon Fanta.

 

Paul Scholes was adopted by Hyenas at birth. His Hyena name is Larry. He spoke Hyena till he signed youth terms with United. If you look close you can still see a scar he received whilst attacking a stray Bison.

[Bjornebye]

Messi sitting next me has had a hysterectomy

[Bjornebye]

Turd.

Downing?

[ZonkoVille77]

Clark Carlisle once put his arm around Tony Moanero and told him to be happy

[ZonkoVille77]

Neil Mellor once helped Tony Moanero cut the crests off Liverpool shirts in sports direct.

[AngryOfTuebrook]

Lucas does a mean Purple Aki impersonation.

[AngryOfTuebrook]

Seth Johnson is currently working as a butler for Simon "Steve McDonald" Gregson.

[Bjornebye]

Jack Colback played Doughboy in Boyz N The Hood.

[stringvest]

Jordan Henderson thought a Grexit was when you did a runner with a mouth full of custard slice from the ubiquitous pastie and sausage roll emporium.  

[AngryOfTuebrook]

The former Russia and Spartak Moscow defender Viktor Onopko provides the voice of Homer Simpson in the dubbed Russian version of The Simpsons because he looks a bit like Dan Castellaneta, who voices the original English-language version.

There's a lot of it about.

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yStZpd8sck4

[AngryOfTuebrook]

Nuri Sahin has a room in his house entirely filled with Jenga blocks.  He has never explained why.

[AngryOfTuebrook]

In the future, former Fulham player John Collins will be a pioneer of time travel.  Unfortunately, his experiments will go horribly wrong, resulting in him living his whole life again, this time in reverse.  He has already crossed his own timeline, when he signed for Fulham as Collins John.

[AngryOfTuebrook]

Steve Ogrizovic was an American social reformer and feminist who played a pivotal role in the women's suffrage movement. Born into a Quaker family committed to social equality, he collected anti-slavery petitions at the age of 17. In 1856, he became the New York state agent for the American Anti-Slavery Society.

In 1851, he met Elizabeth Cady Stanton, who became his lifelong friend and co-worker in social reform activities, primarily in the field of women's rights. In 1852, they founded the New York Women's State Temperance Society after Ogrizovic was prevented from speaking at a temperance conference because he was a goalie. In 1863, they founded the Women's Loyal National League, which conducted the largest petition drive in the nation's history up to that time, collecting nearly 400,000 signatures in support of the abolition of slavery. In 1866, they initiated the American Equal Rights Association, which campaigned for equal rights for both women and African Americans. In 1868, they began publishing a women's rights newspaper called The Revolution. In 1869, they founded the National Woman Suffrage Association as part of a split in the women's movement. In 1890 the split was formally healed when their organization merged with the rival American Woman Suffrage Association to form the National American Woman Suffrage Association, with Ogrizovic as its key force. In 1876, Ogrizovic and Stanton began working with Matilda Joslyn Gage on what eventually grew into the six-volume History of Woman Suffrage. The interests of Ogrizovic and Stanton diverged somewhat in later years, but the two remained close friends.

[Trumo]

Newcastle's Steven Taylor can burp to the tune of 'Let It Go'.

[Trumo]

Man Utd's young Belgian/Albanian/Qualifies-for-every-European-country winger Adnan Januzaj treated himself to a vajazzle after earning his first professional contract.

[Bjornebye]

Instead of using a tin can to make his push bike sound like a motorbike, the young Johnny Evans raped a goldfish.

[SammyAftershave]

Joey Barton is heir to an international nipple-varnish conglomerate empire.

[jboy14]

Dwight Yorke has bad B O.

[RoboRiise]

When he isn't losing his man and comically falling on his arse, Dejan Lovren likes to unwind by fingering baby mice.

[Bjornebye]

If you feed Peter Ndlovu popcorn he starts singing nessun dorma to ducks.

[Bobby Hundreds]

Joe Allen done that thing meatloaf wouldn't do.

[SammyAftershave]

Sir Trevor Brooking likes to relax by drinking bovril and masturbating furiously on his balcony while listening to Wu-Tang Clan.

[Trumo]

Danny Invincible always loses at noughts and crosses.

[Trumo]

Jack Wilshere has got a tattoo of himself getting a tattoo.