Depression

[Guest]

Again mate I totally disagree.

I’ve just spent 3 moths in intensive one to one and group therapy. While it has undoubtedly helped me the main reason it has is not the exceptance of a diagnosis but the desire and discipline to change behaviour to change my mindset.

I have heard excuse after excuse after excuse for peoples behaviour. Be that medical diagnosis, history, trauma etc etc. The professionals I have been involved with are brilliant but without exception everyone I have encountered has been slotted into one classification or another. Be that depression, ADHD, PTSD or simple previous life trauma.

Not once have I heard anyone be advised to get up and face the problem, confront it, beat it.

 

Whilst I am in doubt conditions like depression exist and are a problem they are a lot less prevelant then they are portrayed. It is often convenient for the addict or sufferer to attach the symptoms to the illness and therefore deflect any personal responsibility that they have to getting out of the shitstorm they are no doubt in.

 

Plus it is of increasing importance to maintain the growing industry surrounding these diagnosis.

I'm not quite sure what is being disagreed with as interpretation is surely a behaviour which I completely agree takes commitment, determination, desire and self-discipline. I don't think I suggested that someone should take on their problems, simply to try and see them in a different light. 

[Oh Buoy]

That’s like going for a free brake test at kwik fit while having your exhaust done. Guess what you need new brakes.

 

It's designed to give an indication of where people are on a scale. 

 

Scales + presenting problem + historical episodes/events = a good overall assessment of whether step 2 intervention would be appropriate to reduce those symptoms. Sometimes you find people try step 2 and don't really get any recovery. We'd then look to step them up for step 3 for a higher intensity intervention. 

 

The point is, there's always support available. If you're wondering whether you're depressed, check in with you GP. 

 

They're only job is to look after you. 

 

And obviously know some medicine-related shit. 

[Anny Road]

Maybe we do agree but the thrust of being diagnosed with depression usual leads to meds not a kick up the arse.

[Guest]

Maybe we do agree but the thrust of being diagnosed with depression usual leads to meds not a kick up the arse.t

Medication is an absolute last resort and should certainly not be the only solution to a problem but a part of a longer term solution. Hopefully anyone who does feel like that can find a way to get the assistance needed to create that solution as there are ways to feel better and in control of your life that don't rely entirely on medication.

[Oh Buoy]

Maybe we do agree but the thrust of being diagnosed with depression usual leads to meds not a kick up the arse.

 

I think that's more your perception of medication than it is the rationale. 

 

GP's are giving medication to solve the issue - it's to stabilise your mood so you can either self-manage or seek therapy to develop coping strategies to maintain and control your mood. 

[Aventus]

There’s an app called the Depression test as well. It’s based on a recognised way of diagnosing depressive illness, in fact my doctor used it on me when I finally went.

 

One of these types of things was one of the main catalysts behind me finally going the docs and getting help.

 

Think it was at the end of a debt consolidation website, stepchange maybe and there was a small link to the test at the end, thought fuck it I'm bored and turns out I was more fucked than I first realised.

 

Worth a go for anybody on the fence, it's really quick, make a brew and the test will be done before you've finished drinking it.

[Roidster]

CALM stands for the Campaign Against Living Miserably. Mainly focused towards men and our tendency to bottle up issues which can affect our mental health. Their website has lots of information and a freecall helpline number. I'm struggling at the minute and phoned them a couple of nights ago. It's good to talk and have someone else listen to your problems and maybe offer a different perspective. Good luck to anyone struggling at the minute, I'd recommend this helpline.

 

Sent from my SM-A520F using Tapatalk

[Fowlers God]

According to Buoy questions im FUCKED

[Oh Buoy]

According to Buoy questions im FUCKED

 

Seek some support. 

 

It's perfectly fine to max out both of those sets of questions. I've had clients score the maximum and after 8 weeks score around 2 and 1 on each. Recovery is possible, it's just what you're willing to put in is what you'll get out. 

[Captain Turdseye]

 

Over the last 2 weeks, how often have you been bothered by any of the following problems?

 

You will need to score the following statements:

0 = Not at all

1 = Several days

2 = Most than half the days

3 = Nearly everyday

 

Set 1:

1 Little interest or pleasure in doing things? - 1

2 Feeling down, depressed or hopeless? - 0

3 Trouble falling or staying asleep or sleeping too much? - 3

4 Feeling tired or having little energy? - 2

5 Poor appetite or overeating? - 1

6 Feeling bad about yourself/that you are a failure or have let yourself or your family down? - 1

7 Trouble concentrating on things (e.g. reading the newspaper/watching TV)? - 2

8 Moving or speaking so slowly that other people could have noticed? Or the opposite, being so fidgety or restless that you have been moving around a lot more than usual? - 1

9 Thoughts that you would be better off dead or of hurting yourself in some way? - 0

Eleven! I need to speak to my neurologists. The bastards have been stringing me along for two and a half years.

[Anny Road]

Completely subjective and dependant and any number of variables. Not knocking the profession but reminds me of a PPI questionnaire.

[Bob]

I scored 20/27 on that, which apparently means severe depression, and to speak to s doctor. Think I’d best, though reality of it for me is of course I feel like that today. If I do I’m another weeks time I’m in bother but today, surely I’m supposed to feel like that

[Oh Buoy]

Completely subjective and dependant and any number of variables. Not knocking the profession but reminds me of a PPI questionnaire.

That's a flaw in all self-reported measures which is sadly what a lot of psychology defaults too. This scale however has been replicated with various populations and is utilised by most if not all IAPT services to benchmark the effectiveness of CBT. They are also done at weekly intervals to see any difference and an over average is applied to produce a recovery score.

[Anny Road]

That's a flaw in all self-reported measures which is sadly what a lot of psychology defaults too. This scale however has been replicated with various populations and is utilised by most if not all IAPT services to benchmark the effectiveness of CBT. They are also done at weekly intervals to see any difference and an over average is applied to produce a recovery score.

Yeah get it Buoy. It is difficult to get statistically significant data from a subjective illness. I did Psychology at Uni so understand the basics but only a basic understanding.

When we did psychometric questionnaires it may have been 40 questions many of which cross referenced each other to determine an element of objectivity.

[Ezekiel 25:17]

A lot of emphasis is made about seeking help, support and talking about things. Whilst I would not for one minute dismiss that, it is also important to work on your own strength. I found being too reliant upon others further weakened me. Over analysis of everything gave me tailor made excuses.

Do things to strengthen you.

Don’t put stuff off. Get up early despite how little you want to. Diet, exercise, don’t drink or use stuff. Set goals which you are likely to hit and reward yourself when you do.

 

 

I do think this forum leans heavily towards seeking professional help, I understand why, a lot of people don't get it when they need it to so people have a massively heightened sense towards it. I just think there's a lot of steps you can take before you delve into the prescription and professional treatment world. Bob has genuine reasons to feel stressed and the weight of the world at the moment, I'd be very surprised if he was suffering from depression, not to say it won't lead to it if things aren't addressed.

[Captain Turdseye]

Free drugs.

 

[Fowlers God]

A lot of clarity this morning with regards to home. I can’t make her love me or want to be with me. I don’t think she knows herself but my importance is myself and the kids. Unfortunately neither of us will be in a position to live separately for a few years financially so that will be difficult but I think I’m able to start moving on.

[Captain Turdseye]

A lot of clarity this morning with regards to home. I can’t make her love me or want to be with me. I don’t think she knows herself but my importance is myself and the kids. Unfortunately neither of us will be in a position to live separately for a few years financially so that will be difficult but I think I’m able to start moving on.

Bloody hell mate.

[Ezekiel 25:17]

A lot of clarity this morning with regards to home. I can’t make her love me or want to be with me. I don’t think she knows herself but my importance is myself and the kids. Unfortunately neither of us will be in a position to live separately for a few years financially so that will be difficult but I think I’m able to start moving on.

 

 

FG i've seen you write something very, very similar to this before on here, and all I mean by that is if it turned itself around that time it can again, if that's what you want. You don't need to make ANYONE want to love you or be with you, your self worth is much, much more than that, as you hopefully are seeing. You're at a low point now so it's natural to want to try and cling to her, but you're the one who's going to turn it arounf for yourself, not her.

[Anny Road]

A lot of clarity this morning with regards to home. I can’t make her love me or want to be with me. I don’t think she knows herself but my importance is myself and the kids. Unfortunately neither of us will be in a position to live separately for a few years financially so that will be difficult but I think I’m able to start moving on.

Good luck mate. Hope it works.

I was in a similar situation a while back and tearing my hair out with worry. In the=end I simply put all the responsibility back on to her as she was doing all the pushing. I simply asked her what does she want? What does she want to do? I did not want to be part of the descion, she needed to make up her mind and stop poking me with a stick in the hope I would make it for her.

[Fowlers God]

Bloody hell mate.

She says she loves me but feels really far away from me and nothing I do has drawn her closer to me. She wants to hope that it’s the tablets she was taking herself but my own mental health can’t wait around waiting for her to make her mind up whether or not she wants to be my wife.

 

There’s a conversation that is personal (or more personal than the above) that i had with her this morning and I already feel 100% better. Hopefully it’s the tablets working for me.

[Fowlers God]

FG i've seen you write something very, very similar to this before on here, and all I mean by that is if it turned itself around that time it can again, if that's what you want. You don't need to make ANYONE want to love you or be with you, your self worth is much, much more than that, as you hopefully are seeing. You're at a low point now so it's natural to want to try and cling to her, but you're the one who's going to turn it arounf for yourself, not her.

Thanks pal. And as I’ve said before everything that we as a couple have been through has usually been because I’ve been a dick or I’ve fucked up somehow and our relationship has taken a hit so I’ve been the one who has had to apologise. This time with her own admission I haven’t done anything and are perfect.

[Ezekiel 25:17]

Thanks pal. And as I’ve said before everything that we as a couple have been through has usually been because I’ve been a dick or I’ve fucked up somehow and our relationship has taken a hit so I’ve been the one who has had to apologise. This time with her own admission I haven’t done anything and are perfect.

 

Two people going through mental health issues would test the most harmonious relationship, sounds like you've had a bit of progress this morning in whatever capacity, build on that, focus on the kids together, put the relationship to the side and see what happens, it seems highly unlikely either of you are going to start looking elsewhere. Two people living together bringing up children together, for now.

[Fowlers God]

Two people going through mental health issues would test the most harmonious relationship, sounds like you've had a bit of progress this morning in whatever capacity, build on that, focus on the kids together, put the relationship to the side and see what happens, it seems highly unlikely either of you are going to start looking elsewhere. Two people living together bringing up children together, for now.

100%

[Bjornebye]

Thats shit Dan. Fingers crossed for you that it works out. Maybe give the beard a shave???