I’ll start this week at the Emirates as Arsenal conceded a hilarious late equaliser against Leicester. They’ve had a mini revival recently and they started well against Brendan’s side, but that just makes what happened later even funnier.
Saka teed up Aubamayeng for the opener and Lacazette thought he’d made it 2-0 only to be denied by a stunning Schmeichel save. The keeper then denied Bellerin as Arsenal piled on the pressure. And then…. Arsenal happened.
Nketiah came off the bench and within seconds he’d been sent off. Initially the ref gave him a yellow but he went to look at the screen and changed it to red. It wasn’t intentional but he was late and high and didn’t get the ball, so it’s the right decision, regardless of what Arteta thinks.
Leicester dominated the second half and deserved Vardy’s late equaliser but what made this so much funnier was that Arsenal were fuming about it because they wanted offside against that loser Ayoze Perez.
Only one problem, he didn’t touch the ball. Just look at the reaction of the Arsenal Fan TV crew after that goal though…..
Every game post-lockdown, when Arsenal have conceded a key goal, I’ve searched out the ArsenalFanTV reaction. I’m not proud of it but I can’t stop myself.
— HLTCO (@HLTCO) July 8, 2020
pic.twitter.com/gGYRyej7th
It’s easy to be cynical and say they’re doing this for the cameras but if they are then they deserve Oscars for this performance. I’d say the truth is more likely that DT and Troopz are just not particularly well balanced individuals and both have severe anger management issues.
What baffles me is how they are even still arsed. I’d have long been beaten into submission if that was my team. I mean yeah, I’d be that angry if we were relevant and the result actually had implications, but what stakes are Arsenal playing for?
How has indifference and then apathy not set in yet?
It’s just weird. You’ve got Troopz and DT kicking off like they’d just been screwed out of a place in the Champions League Final. Fucking weirdos.
Seriously, how can you get that worked up about watching THAT group of players? It’s not healthy. It’s poor little Ty I feel sorry for, he never gets angry (unless you question his fanbase), he just looks sad.
Arteta showed his true colours afterwards when he went the “Full Pep”, claiming Vardy should have been sent off for what was a clearly accidental clash with Mustafi.
Actually, he didn’t even say that specifically, he was a complete arse about it and kept talking about “a challenge that happened between 40 and 45 minutes”.
Geoff Shreeves had no idea what he was referring to (which in fairness you wouldn’t do, as it was never a red card in a million years) and had to ask him which incident specifically did he mean. Arteta wouldn’t say, he just kept saying “it happened between 40-45 minutes”.
Just fucking say it you silly playmobil headed cunt. No-one has time for any of this cryptic bullshit and there was no reason whatsoever to not specify which incident he was on about. It’s not often I’ll ever side with Shreeves as he’s a dick, but for once he wasn’t the biggest arsewipe in the conversation. As I say, proper spoilt brat Guardiola behaviour that.
Anyway, moving swiftly on. Big handsome Giroud put Chelsea in front against Palace when he converted a Willian cutback. Harsh on Roy’s boys as Willian only got in because Cahill’s hamstring snapped and gave him a free run on goal.
Giroud might be one of the most under-appreciated strikers I can remember you know. He’s generally been regarded as a back up or a Plan B off the bench (like a French Peter Crouch) but he’s fucking boss. He’s been so much better than he’s ever given credit for and he’s always given us problems when we’ve faced him. Fucking good player him. If his choice of clubs had been more palatable he might have earned ‘my boy’ status by now.
The in form Pulisic made it 2-0 with another nice goal and Willian almost made it 3-0 following more good play by Pulisic. Chelsea looked like they’d run up a cricket score at this point. Then out of nowhere Zaha hit a screamer to bring Palace back into it (shite from Kepa again though). Rack up another assist for me there as I slated Wilf in the last round up for the poor season he’s having.
Substitute Abraham made it 3-1 with a nice finish. Brilliant play by Loftus-Cheek to set that one up. Palace hit back straight away though when Van Aanholt cut it back to give Benteke a chance even he couldn’t miss.
Joel Ward thought he’d equalised right at the death with a header that came back off the inside of the post, and even after that Palace had a chance but Benteke took too long to get his shot away and was blocked by Zouma.
That Gilmour kid started for Chelsea with Jorginho still not getting a sniff. Looks like he’s been bombed out since the restart as he hasn’t featured at all. Probably wishes he’d signed for City when he had the chance. Maybe they’ll go back in for him, who knows. He’s a good player, brilliant on the ball and a great passer but he’s not physical enough and can’t defend to save his life. He’d fit right in there.
Watford picked up a vital home win over doomed Norwich. Buendia put the Canaries ahead with a lovely strike. He always looks good whenever I see him play, but that was his first goal of the season so that’s obviously not good enough for an attacking player.
Craig Dawson equalised with a back post header. He does that far more than someone of his size has a right to. He’s not a big commanding centre half, but he’s a sneaky bastard and gets his share of goals.
Not something you can say about Danny Welcrap but he managed a rare moment of quality when he won it with a stunning overhead kick. There won’t be a better strike in July but that’s no guarantee of winning goal of the month, as if there’s any Liverpool goal in the mix then that will win because BBC stupidly opened it up to fans, and we’re the internet fan poll kings. I mean shit, we even decided who went in Spurs’ Team of the Decade, so when it comes to goal of the month no-one else stands a chance.
West Ham’s little mini-run is over after they lost 1-0 at home to Burnley. The only goal of the game came via the head of Jay Rodriguez and it was a cracker. West Ham played pretty well and had the better chances but they didn’t take any of them. The closest they came was when Antonio hit the post.
Substitute Haller almost scored with his first touch but was denied by a brilliant save from Pope. He shouldn’t be playing at all as West Ham stopped paying the instalments on his transfer and Frankfurt lodged a complaint. I’ve got no sympathy for the German club here. If you deal with Tories then you’ve got to be prepared to get shafted.
More refereeing mistakes in this one. Tarkowski was booked for a thigh high rake of the studs on Bowen. How the fuck is that not being given as a red by VAR? Unbelievable that.
Got to hand it to Sean Dyche’s side though, they’re proper resolute fuckers aren’t they? They’re 9th and might actually sneak a Europa League spot. I hope they do.
It wasn’t so long ago I was pretty sneering about them but I’ve had one of my trademark changes of heart. When you see what everyone else is spending it’s staggering that Burnley are able to do what they do.
It might not be pretty and you don’t have to like watching them (I certainly don’t) but you have to respect the job Dyche has done. It’s a bit of a Tony Pulis at Stoke situation I guess, although Stoke seemed to have far more resources than Burnley.
Sheffield United had a dramatic late win over Wolves as John Egan headed in the winner three minutes into stoppage time. Two goals in two for him now, which is funny because his manager ripped him after his winner last week by saying “he should be on ten goals by now, he misses too many chances”. To his credit Egan actually agreed with him.
I’d compare the Blades with Burnley in some ways except they’ve actually sneakily spent big, mainly on forwards who are struggling to reach double figures between them.
Chris Wilder is boss though, I’m happy to see them picking up points again after the ropey start they made after footy came back. I’m a bit pissed off with Wolves though as I was looking to them to finish above United and they’re letting me down now with these defeats.
They can have no complaints. Wolves were a bit shit and the Blades deserved the points. My boy Adama was subbed having made no impact whatsoever, and I’ve come to the conclusion that Wolves just don’t really know how to use him. He doesn’t fit into their 3-5-2 which is why he doesn’t start all the time. Sometimes he plays wing back, other times he’s centre forward. Stick him in our 4-3-3 and he’d be unstoppable. Shame we can’t afford him.
Elsewhere, David Silva was the star of the show as City destroyed Newcastle at the Etihad. Good luck replacing him.
It ended up 5-0 because no-one piles it on quite like City. When they go a couple of goals up it’s amazing how many late goals they get to run up the score. Enough about them though, I have nothing to say about them this week. First is first, second is nowhere. Fuck off City.
Tell you what though, I quite like Micah Richards. He seems to be on virtually every footy show on the BBC currently and I’ve seen him trending on Twitter a few times, mainly because loads of people are slagging him off. Not me.
Like most MOTD pundits he’s not going to do much in terms of breaking down a game tactically (in fairness that kind of analysis isn’t really MOTD’s style as it’s more of an informal type chat) but he just seems like a good lad who loves his job. Some pundits show virtually no enthusiasm whatsoever but he always seems like he’s having a whale of a time.
Onto Thursday night’s games now and I’ll start at the Pit where in form Southampton were held to a draw by plucky Everton.
The Saints were awarded a dodgy penalty after Ward-Prowse took a tumble in the box. It wouldn’t have even been a pen if he hadn’t already committed to falling over before Gomes got near him. He was already on his way down though so for me that’s no pen. He missed anyway so it was moot.
Ings broke the deadlock with another lovely goal. He’s just dynamite at the moment. The lead didn’t last long though as Richarlison levelled against the run of play. Fantastic team goal that actually.
And that’s how it finished despite Southampton having several chances to win it.
I saw something the other day saying that in the Premier League era Everton are the only side to have been an ever present but never finished in the top three or the bottom three. It was highlighting just how pointless they are.
I feel like that’s harsh. If there had been hawkeye goal-line technology at Bolton or if Hans Segers hadn’t taken a bribe Everton would have been in the bottom three at least once.
Spurs and Bournemouth played out a dire 0-0 draw. Bournemouth thought they’d won it at the death with an overhead kick from Callum Wilson. They had music playing and the players were all celebrating but VAR cut it short as it came off the hand of Josh King.
Even then they still could have won it but sub Harry Wilson was denied by a stunning save from Lloris.
It’s just dead funny seeing how boring Spurs have become as the season has progressed. Mourinho has stamped his image all over them now and they’re just brutal to watch. Kane must hate it as he used to get loads of chances and now he’ feeding on scraps/
Mourinho is blaming refs now too, so it’s all very much par for the course. Spurs should have had a pen when Kane was shoved. Mourinho reckons they didn’t get it because he criticised VAR last week. “People in power do not like to be criticised”.
He’s not wrong, but his beef shouldn’t be with Michael Oliver (the VAR ref who disallowed Kane’s goal last week for a Lucas Moura ‘handball’) as he was only doing his job by enforcing a shit rule. He didn’t make the shit rule.
Still, Jose deflects. It’s what he does. He’s always been the same. Get people talking about other reasons why his team is failing. He’s really good at it to be fair. You could even call him ‘special’.
Tell you something else, Deli Alli’s revival didn’t last long did it? About three games to be exact. Done fuck all since.
Oh by the way, I asked my mum the other day what she thought of the Lloris / Son dust up. Needless to say she was firmly on the side of the keeper because she reckons Son has been shite lately.
Her exact words were “he’s not been the same since he came back from the war”. I assume she meant national service unless there’s something I don’t know about what South Korea have been up to. It was only three fucking weeks though!
That one’s right up there with her not being surprised about Jack Grealish drink driving during lockdown because “you can tell by the way he wears his socks he has no respect for the law”.
One week I might just have her sit with me while I watch MOTD and I’ll just write down all of the random shit she comes out with.
Speaking of Grealish though, Villa’s relegation worries intensified this week after a loss to next season’s Champions elect.
Villa were always going to be up against it given their horrendous record against United over the years, especially at home. They’ve suffered more beatings than an Evertonian wife on derby day. An already tough task was made almost impossible though by Fat Jon Moss and his infatuation with Bruno Fernandez.
Maybe him and Martin Tyler should have a celebrity death match for charity with the winner getting to tongue the balls of the Portuguese Sigurdsson?
Villa were doing alright until Fernandez jumped into a defender and hit the deck, only for Moss to award a penalty. He did the exact same thing at Spurs too if you remember. Fernandez jumped into Eric Dier that night and Moss awarded a pen only for VAR to tell him “behave yourself fatso”.
Unfortunately for Villa this time the VAR official didn’t correct his mistake. It was scandalous really. Such a bad decision that even Peter Schmeichel was posting the angry face emoji about it on Twitter.
Not only is it not a penalty, it’s a free-kick to Villa because he stamped on the shin of the defender. I just don’t know how you can see that incident and judge it the way Moss did, but what makes it worse is the VAR gimp being afraid to over-rule him.
Fernandez had tried to do a Zidane pirouette but he forgot to take the ball with him. Giving a penalty for that is a crime against football.
United went on to win comfortably enough but when you’re being handed presents like that on a weekly basis it makes winning much easier. Let’s see how they do on a level fucking playing field.
He’s a cheating cunt that Fernandez. I’m sick of all the fawning over him but I’m even more bothered by the lack of calling him out over his fucking diving. You know the only person I’ve heard do it? Mourinho, and he was almost admiring in the way he did it, smiling as he said “Let’s just say he’s from a country I know very well”.
The amount of pens they’re getting is a fucking joke now. Over the last couple of years it probably matches us and City combined. I saw a stat that had them being responsible for over 10% of all the penalties awarded in the Premier League.
It’s not normal, there’s something not right about it. I don’t know why they’re getting so many pens but I don’t buy into any of these “they want United to get into the top four” conspiracy theories. That’s just complete bollocks.
Nevertheless, it’s not just ‘one of those things’. There is a reason they are getting far more pens than anyone else and we can’t put it down to Ferguson’s influence anymore either.
It’s probably just a combination of terrible refereeing and them having more diving bastards than most other teams. It’s helping them out massively though so from that point of view it’s fucking annoying.
There’s actually talk in the manc press about United showing “title winning form” now. Hilarious. They’ve beaten a load of shit teams since lockdown (they couldn’t beat Spurs though) and people are calling this “title winning form”.
Quick reminder. Three years ago City won the title with 100 points. Last year they won it with 98 points (we’d shown ‘title winning form’ by picking up 97 points but that wasn’t actually enough to, y’know, win the title) and this year it’s looking like we’ll be around or above the 100 point mark.
Yet United beat up on Bournemouth, Brighton and Villa and suddenly they’ve been catapulted into our bracket. Pleeeeease. Do me a fucking favour.
You’ve even got Paul fucking Scholes saying we’re worried about United. He doesn’t talk much but when he does he tends to come out with some real shite doesn’t he? Silly ginger bollocks. File this one away with Michael Ball saying we were running scared after the Divock Derby.
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