It was another limited week of Premier League fixtures due to some clubs farting around in some Mickey Mouse cup competition.
Such was the lack of action that we were first on MOTD even though we played Friday night. Indeed, such was the lack of action that BBC gave Gary Lineker and all their regular pundits the night off and drafted in Gabby Logan, Alex Scott and Paul Ince.
Genuinely don’t know how Ince still gets any work you know. I mean, it’s ok to not be the brightest bulb in the box if you’re funny or a bit of a character (Paul Merson, Robbie Savage and Ian Wright immediately spring to mind), but Ince brings nothing to the table. And when he talks always seems like he’s terrified. Like a naughty kid in front of the headmaster. Still, at least he’s not Alan Shearer or Phil Neville, so that’s something.
Anyway, after the main course of us beating Southampton, it was pretty slim pickings and next up was Bournemouth losing at home to Burnley.
They took the lead when Ashley Barnes deflected the ball into his own net, but it was all downhill from there for Eddie Howe’s men.
Chris Wood equalised soon after when he took advantage of a howler from Begovic to head home. Westwood then side footed Burnley ahead and Barnes wrapped it up when he benefitted from another clanger by the hapless Begovic.
Begovic was dropped a few weeks back and apparently Boruc was told he’d be number one for the rest of the reason. That was until Begovic went in to see Eddie Howe and kicked off, and was promptly reinstated. He’s been shite since he came back in though.
Boruc should probably go knocking on Nice Guy Eddie’s door this week. Although he’s more likely to just kick the fucking thing in, the mad bastard. Putting Begovic back in was either a stroke of genius by Howe (proving he was right to drop him in the first place) or he's a bit of a jellyfish.
The home fans booed at the end and you can understand their frustration to a degree as their record since November is terrible. They started the season brilliantly but since then it’s been relegation form. They do this every year though, they’re right streaky bastards.
Burnley are almost safe now though and they can make it pretty much certain by beating Cardiff this weekend. I reckon they’ll give City all they can handle in a few weeks, regardless of whether they ‘need’ to win or not.
They love sticking it to the big boys and unlike most of the bottom feeders they’ll relish playing City. Especially Barnes.
It wasn’t so long ago that I couldn’t stand him, but much like my boy Troy (congrats on reaching the final, big man), he’s won me over. If he scores a winner against City I might even get a tattoo of his face. On my face.
Anyway, moving on. Newcastle were all over Wilfried Palace in the opening stages of their game at St James’. Rondon could have had a hat-trick and Richie also went close as the Geordies laid siege to the Palace goal.
Palace then thought they’d scored with their first attack when Tomkins fired in from a corner, but their celebrations were belatedly cut short by a linesman’s flag.
It was the correct decision as McArthur was stood in front of the keeper in an offside position, and he also stuck a leg out to try and get a touch on the ball (he didn’t touch it). The annoying thing though is the next time that happens there’s every chance a goal will be awarded because of how they’ve made a complete Jon Walters of the offside law.
Benteke had a great chance to break the deadlock but made a predictable dogs dinner out of it. Instead of getting a shot away he unintentionally trapped the ball and ended up nearly sitting on it. Jeez.
I’m struggling to think of any footballer whose form fell off a cliff as badly as Benteke’s has. I feel bad for the guy. He wasn’t brilliant, but he was pretty fucking good. Now he’s dreadful, and there’s no real explanation for it as it’s not like he’s old or ravaged by injuries. Has to be confidence really. Poor sod.
Newcastle continued to dominate but Palace were dangerous on the break with Zaha and Townsend, and then they got a penalty. Of course they did. Zaha won it. Of course he did. And Milovojevic converted it. Of course he did. I think I’ll just copy and paste that each week now.
Newcastle have got enough of a cushion over Cardiff for this to probably not matter. Seven points clear having played a game more. They’ll be fine.
Tell you what though, Zaha was fucking mesmerising at times. He’s second only to Jamie Vardy when it comes to opposing players I most enjoy watching. He’s fucking brilliant.
Speaking of Vardy, he’s loving life under Brendan isn’t he? Seven goals in six games now after he bagged two in a 4-1 win at Huddersfield on Saturday.
Tielemans fired in from the edge of the box to set them on their way, and Vardy converted a stunning cross from Ricardo (superb player him) to make it 2-0.
Mooy pulled one back from the spot but Vardy’s persistence won a free-kick that Maddison curled in to make it 3-1. Vardy then won and converted a penalty to wrap up a fourth straight win for Brendan’s boys.
Tell you one of the many things I like about Vardy. Even though he clearly wasn’t happy under Puel he always put a shift in and did things the right way.
He still gave everything he had for Puel, but the Frenchman not only didn’t play to Vardy’s strengths, he kept leaving him out. Fucking whispering weirdo.
You see some top players completely mail it in when they don’t like a manager *cough* Hazard *cough* Pogba. Not Vardy though. He’s like Charlie Sheen, he only has one speed, one gear - GO!
If Leicester buy well this summer they might make a run at the top six next year. If United, Arsenal or Chelsea were to take a little step backwards and Brendan continues the way he’s started, who knows. Same goes for Wolves.
Watching this game though I couldn’t help but wonder what Danny Ward must have been thinking on the Leicester bench. Huddersfield’s keepers are both crap, he’s way better than them and he’s loved at Huddersfield after his playoff final heroics. Now he’s sat on Leicester’s bench without a hope in hell of ever winning a place in the team. I have no idea why he made that move, it was just weird.
Onto Sunday now. Everton beat Arsenal but - full disclosure - I'm not watching MOTD2 just to write about that, so I skipped it. From what I hear, the Blues battered them and it should have been four or five.
That’s Arsenal though isn’t it? They take care of business against shite at home but any time they go away into a hostile environment or against a side that might make it a bit physical, they just fucking wilt.
Mesut Oil was back in the line up, so it’s no surprise how this game played out. He’s the living embodiment of modern day Arsenal. The ultimate fair weather player in a fair weather team.
They put themselves into a great position to get top four and maybe even finish above Spurs, and then they go and deliver a performance like this. Pure Arsenal.
Of course they then beat Napoli at the Emirates. What price them going over there and getting a proper hiding though? Massive fucking losers.
They’ve lost third spot to Chelsea who beat West Ham on Monday night. Eden Hazard was the difference between the two sides as he warmed up for his inevitable dazzling Anfield showing with a stunning display capped by both goals in a 2-0 win.
It might be the best individual performance by anyone all season, he was fucking ridiculous.
Roll on Sunday, eh?
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