Joleon Lescott, Andrew Johnson and Alan Stubbs have been lined up by Bill Kenwright to star in his West End production of “Star Trek – The Musical”. Defender Lescott will play the part of Lietenant Worf, whilst striker Johnson will play Captain Jean-Luc Picard. It’s not known yet what part Stubbs has been earmarked for, although early rumours suggest one of his nostrils may be used as a black hole.
An excited Kenwright enthused: “Joleon is absolutely perfect for the role of Worf. Those smouldering dark eyes, those broad shoulders, that wonderful high hairline of his. . . when I saw him in his uniform, I gotta tell ya, I cried.” The blues chairman was quick to dismiss rumours that Lescott only landed the role because he wouldn’t need any make up work done to give him the distinctive Klingon forehead: “I’ve heard those stories, they’re nonsense, absolute poppycock” said an angry Bill.
Johnson’s involvement was slightly more of a surprise, but Kenwright insists he’s made the right choice: “AJ was born to play the role of Jean Luc” he said. “Just looking at the way the light refects of his beautiful shiny baldhead is a moving experience. Andrew is an absolutely fabulous actor, especially in plays. I guess you could say he’s a genuine playactor.”
Tony Hibbert had originally been pencilled in for a part in the play, but had trouble coming to terms with the language of the theatre. The full back was removed from the cast after an unfortunate incident in rehearsals when a 17 year old stage hand had to be taken to hospital after Hibbert misunderstood Kenwright’s request of ‘Break a leg, son!’ and lunged at the poor youngster from behind with both feet of the ground.