Forumite Limerick Time!

[Alan Sex]

A forumite called Alex Woo

Had to wank 'cos his balls had turned blue

Pulled his willy to shreds

Reading Alan Sex threads

'Til he covered his keyboard in goo.

 

Bloke from Nunavut - let's call him Pat

Brought an Inuit girl to his flat

Rammed her hard up the butt

Til he busted her gut

And all over his bedspread she shat.

 

One day SKI (we all know she's a diva)

Met a man with a dick like a cleaver

She said "In a push,

You can finger my tush

But you're not putting that in my beaver!"

[Fugitive]

One day SKI (we all know she's a diva)

Met a man with a dick like a cleaver

She said "In a push,

You can finger my tush

But you're not putting that in my beaver!"

 

Hahahahahaha

[Woo]

Bravo Sex, Bravo!

 

That's stale milk on my keyboard, I spilt a milkshake a few weeks back, honest!

[RobbieOR]

haha class.

[AVEEZ]

There once was a bloke called simonlfcgreen

Whose problems just werent as they seemed

He hid from his bills and wore skirts with lace frills

and cried like a girl in his dreams!!

 

There once a bird named gazelle

who was down in the dumps, nah in hell

she made me quite cross

but is actually rather boss (I know its weak)

I love her and think she is swell!!

[Alan Sex]

There once was a bird named Gazelle

Who was down in the dumps, nah in hell

I said "don't be glum

'Cos you've got a nice bum

When I look at it, it makes me swell!"

[aws]

A Canadian poster called Patrick

Had habits that'd make a cat sick

He fist fucked a seal

Then a walrus with zeal

And a decrepit old moose for his hat-trick

[gazelle]

awwww thanks guys!! love you lot...

[Alan Sex]

Once a really fat bird from Vancouver

Showed Neko a new sex maneuver

Her farts were a disgrace

As she sat on his face

He passed out before he could remove 'er.

[gazelle]

That boys got talent! (in the voice of samuel jackson)

[Woo]

That boys got talent! (in the voice of samuel jackson)

 

Just like the start of Eddie Murphy Raw?

[gazelle]

that's the bad boy...

[Flying Pig]

There once was a man called Lurtz,

Who liked the smell of men's turds,

He was tied to a bed,

My a man called Fred,

And bummed til his bum really hurts.

[Alan Sex]

Flying Pig met some bird while in France

And fucked her up the ass while they danced

She said "I'm a bloke"

Pig replied "yes, I'd hoped

When I saw the big bulge in your pants"

[Flying Pig]

Someone rep Sex. Insulting but superb.

[Ezekiel 25:17]

There once was a man called Rondeco

That wasn't actually his real name but a forum handle he had assigned himself

Someone once suggested he looked like Pete Price

I hope he hanged his head in shame.

 

 

There once was a forumite know as The Fugitive

He wasnt an actual Fugitive

He has 3'00 odd posts

 

 

 

There once was a guy called Nick Leeson

I fucking HATE him.

[Paulie Dangerously]

There once was a chap; Alan Sex

His obscene posting did not vex,

He posted big tits,

And pink womens bits,

Till most of GF cummed their kecks

[Guest TK-421]

There once was a kid called "Anito"

Who ate four hundred burritos

He puked them all up

Then shat in a cup

And fed it to Danny DeVito

[Thants]

There was an old poster called Momo

Who people declared a great homo

Depending on his liver

It failed to deliver

And so he ended up in a como

[Alan Sex]

I would like to title this one "That's Not The Roid We're Looking For".

 

TK421's bum felt quite sore

So he went to the doc to make sure

Doctor said "you've got piles"

But his knife missed by miles

TK's left bollock fell to the floor.

[Guest TK-421]

There once was a young dude called "Woo"

Surreptitiously he had a poo

He concealed it in lard

Until it went hard

And sold it as tiramisu

[Alan Sex]

Hamstrung took a lady to bed

"It's my first time in years" he said

She said "that sounds neat"

As she sucked on his meat

Hammy shot off the back of her head.

[Woo]

There once was a young dude called "Woo"

Surreptitiously he had a poo

He concealed it in lard

Until it went hard

And sold it as tiramisu

 

I've just had a poo in work aswell, in the disabled bogs. Wierd timing that.

[Guest TK-421]

There was a young cop called Chris Royle

Who discovered a nasty puss boil

He rubbed on the top

Until it went pop

And preserved the remains in tin foil

[Guest TK-421]

I've just had a poo in work aswell, in the disabled bogs. Wierd timing that.

 

Don't tell me you've concealed it in lard.